Mensa Otabil - Restrain Your Lips
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Proverbs chapter 10, verse 19: In the multitude of words, sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise. One of the ways in which we make mistakes in life is in what we say, and the passage appropriately states that where there are so many words, there is much talking; sin is not lacking and is very easy to come our way. But if we’re able to control what we say, we are seen as wise. People evaluate us on three main levels. When people see you, they’re going to make a judgment of who you are based on your appearance, what you’re wearing, how you carry yourself — just your physical appearance.
That’s the first way. Then, when you start speaking, they evaluate you by your words, whether your words are wise or not. Lastly, they evaluate you by your actions. Of the three, I think your words make the deepest impression on people because when people see your appearance, they know that appearances can be deceptive. However, when people listen to you and hear you speak, they can weigh you and determine whether you are wise or not before you even have the chance to act. So, words are very important; they will indicate whether you are diligent or lazy. If you give a job to somebody, the way they respond will tell you whether they are diligent or lazy, whether they are trustworthy or deceitful. All of these are evaluated by our words. Therefore, the way we use our words is very important to our wisdom.
I want to encourage each one of us in three ways. First, we must make intelligent contributions when we are speaking. We don’t just have to speak because words have to be used; we have to speak because something important has to be said. I know that there are people who are temperamentally more outgoing and express themselves more freely than others who are quieter; I understand that. If you are a temperamentally expressive person, then you need to be very wise. You need to pack a lot of wisdom into what you say so that people don’t dismiss you or sideline you simply because they feel your words do not carry weight. So, when we make contributions, let’s make intelligent contributions. Think through the processes that are required for you to make the right intervention.
Secondly, the wise person does not speak rashly. We don’t just jump to conclusions. There are people who jump to conclusions very easily; they believe very quickly, doubt very quickly, and get angry very quickly. Everything is very swift, and if that is your temperament, then let’s put in the effort to slow down the process of our reactions so we don’t react too rashly without consideration. Our mouths must be restrained, as the proverb says.
Thirdly, we must speak with discretion. This is particularly important, especially for those who are tailbearers. You meet with one person and relay the same conversation you had with that person to another who was not there. You enter someone’s presence, and everyone knows what was discussed. When you behave this way, the Bible calls you a tailbearer, and soon nobody will trust you with anything precious because you will spill it immediately after leaving their presence. Therefore, we must speak with discretion. We have to safeguard what people tell us and hold it in trust so that we don’t betray their confidences or misreport them, as these actions are not wise.
To provide you with practical guidance: let us speak with wisdom, make intelligent contributions, avoid speaking rashly, and exercise discretion. I trust that if we can control our tongues, we can control our whole bodies and our entire lives. I hope these messages on wisdom have provided you with insights on how we can improve our lives and make them better than they are now.
Let us pray. Say with me, «Heavenly Father, help me to speak wisely at all times. Teach my tongue the words of wisdom. In Jesus' name, Amen.»