Joyce Meyer - How Can I Live With This Shame? (08/17/2019)
In Revelation 12:10-11, Satan is called the accuser of the brethren, but through Christ's blood and our testimony we overcome him. The preacher shares how guilt from childhood abuse and perfectionism robbed her of joy in salvation, until she learned to separate her identity in Christ from her performance and make peace with herself.
Overcoming the Accuser's Voice
The Bible says in Revelation 12, 10 and 11, that the accuser of the brethren—talking about Satan, that is his name, the accuser of the brethren. And I'll still go through periods of time because that was such a major weakness in my life. That was such an area where Satan had such a stronghold. I felt so bad about myself because my father had sexually abused me. And so I felt guilty. I could never keep my father happy no matter what I did, so I carried that into my relationship with God.
Carrying Childhood Wounds into Faith
And I got into this mindset: I got to do everything just right, got to do it right. And I went through all that—you know, if I'm not reading the Bible through every year, and if I'm not this, and if I'm not that, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not—and looking at everybody else and what I thought I should do because that's what they were doing. And all I was, I was a mess before salvation, then I was just a saved mess.
The Danger of "Christian Misery"
And I don't, you know, the worst thing in the world is to not be saved, but the second worst thing is to be saved and not enjoy it. Did you hear me? God doesn't want you just to trade some worldly misery for a new misery called Christian misery. Jesus said, I came that you might have and enjoy your life and have it in abundance to the full until it overflows.
How can you enjoy life if you don't even like yourself? Some of you need to make peace with yourself. And it's something that only you can do. God created you and you need to learn to love what He created. That doesn't mean you don't have things wrong with you—we all do. But you got to learn to separate your who from your do.
Finding Freedom from Religious Stress
This is the stuff that I found in the word of God that set me free. I would have died from stress, from religious stress, many years ago. Because I loved God and because of my love for God, I wanted so much to please Him. And I tried so hard to do everything right and I just kept messing up.
I could lay in bed and make my plans for holiness, but the moment I put my feet on the floor, my plan ended, and I was like super aware of every little thing that I did wrong. You know what? I'm sure I've done a few things wrong already this morning, but the good news is, I don't know what they were. Because if I was aware of it, I asked for forgiveness right away. I received it and I went on.
Trusting God's View of Your Heart
And then I also just say, "God, forgive me for all that stuff I don't even know that I did." See, God knows your heart. He knows your heart. And if you want to do what's right and you're pressing on, you're doing everything you can to grow, then God sees your heart and He's going to help you get from where you are to where you need to be.
But if you don't get rid of the guilt and the shame and the blame, it weakens you and you can't make any progress.
Changing Your Attitude Toward Mistakes
Some of you are stuck somewhere in some old mistakes, some old things that you ruined or messed up. I want you to have a different attitude today toward your mistakes. Not that we want to get up and make mistakes, not that we're delighted when we make mistakes, but we must understand that Jesus came and dealt with the sin problem.
Sin is not dead, but we are dead to it. There's a part of us, the renewed part of us, that does not want to sin. If you were looking for an excuse to sin, you surely would not have come here today.
You Already Care—That's a Big Deal
So you could at least compliment yourself with this: I at least want to do what's right. Because there is a world full of people who just flat out don't care. But at least you care, and that puts a smile on God's face.
It's really, really important that we don't walk around with this vague sense of failure. Because the devil will start on you from the moment you open your eyes in the morning—and actually before they're opened, if your mind is awake—telling you and rehearsing to you what you're not. You're not, you're not, you're not, you didn't, you're not, you're not.
Learning to Talk Back to the Accuser
And I want to teach you today how to talk back to him and say, I am, I am, I am, I am, I am. I'll be honest with you, if you don't learn how to talk back to the devil, it's going to be rough.
You can talk out loud, you can talk in your head, but you've got to learn how to not just sit around and put up with his lies.
How wonderful it is that when we make mistakes, we can ask God to forgive us, and He does. Why? Just because He wants to. He wants to have relationship with us, and the only way He can do that is to keep forgiving us and forgiving us and forgiving us.
From Guilt to Freedom Through Forgiveness
Now, this was a real eye-opener to me many years ago when I saw this, because I had a huge problem with guilt. I mean, that possibly was one of my biggest problems.
I was abused in my childhood. Any child who's being mistreated normally thinks that there's something they're doing that's causing that. What's wrong with me? What's wrong with me? What's wrong with me? That record played over and over and over in my head for years and years and years.
Breaking Free from Rooted Shame
It was so deeply embedded in me that I was rooted in shame. I did not like myself. I didn't like who I was.
It's a totally different thing to not like what you do than it is to not like who you are.
Adopting a Mature Attitude Every Day
So let those of us who are spiritually mature have this attitude and mindset. I'm going to get up every day and do the best I can. I love God. You love God, you wouldn't be here. If you're still watching this television program, maybe even though you turned it on accidentally, you've got enough of something going on in there—if you've listened to me this long—to want to get to know God better, or you do know God and you want to change.
So just quit persecuting yourself with your inventory of everything that's wrong with you. You're no surprise to God. He knew what He was getting when He got you. And that doesn't mean we don't want to change. I want to change. You're here because you want to change.
Don't Let Yesterday's Mistakes Drag You Back
But I've got to get you to understand that you cannot change if you're going to constantly be drugged back into the past by guilty feelings of everything that you did wrong yesterday. You can't make any progress today if you're going to be stuck in the mistakes of yesterday.
So do you understand that if you're going to have a spiritually mature attitude towards sin and forgiveness, then you must recognize your sin, ask God to forgive you, and then don't spend the next three days feeling guilty. Guilt is a dead work.
Hebrews 5: Time to Grow Beyond Milk
Go to Hebrews 5. For even though by this time you ought to be teaching others... How many of you have been around long enough that really by now you could be a little further down the road than you are?
You say, well, wait a minute. You just told me not to feel guilty. Now you're making me feel guilty. No. See, that's the problem. If you've got to feel guilty because I say that, it's not because I said it, it's because something is off in you.
Respond to Truth Without Self-Condemnation
Why not just say, yeah, man, that's true. I've been doing this already 30 years and I still act like a big baby sometimes. So, you know, yes, I should be further along. Let's help me find out today why I'm not. Not this, oh my God, I'm so terrible. I'm so terrible. That doesn't do one bit of good.
For even though by this time you ought to be teaching others, you actually need someone to teach you over again the very first principles of God's Word. You have come to need milk and not solid food.
The Difference Between Milk and Solid Food
For everyone who continues to feed on milk—and this is talking about the only kind of messages you can take are little, you know, God loves you, you're sweet, you're going to get everything you want, let me give you a word of knowledge, a word of prophecy—God's, you know, you can't take the straighten up, grow up, stop acting like a baby, it's time to get yourself off your mind, think about somebody else.
Then when we hear that kind of stuff, we get mad at the vessel that God is trying to use. We all need encouragement, but we also need correction.
Unskilled in the Doctrine of Righteousness
For everyone who continues to feed on milk is obviously inexperienced and unskilled in the doctrine of righteousness. Lord, mercy, I love that.
In other words, the doctrine of righteousness says, he that knew no sin became sin, that we might be made the righteousness of God in Jesus Christ. He is my standard, not the world. I don't have to please everybody else. I need to live to please God. And I hope they get pleased in the process, but if they don't, I can't let them run my life.
Maturity Means Handling Correction
If you can't handle the meat of the word, if you can't handle correction from the Holy Spirit, if you can't handle correction from some other authority that God has placed over your life, if you have to fall apart every time somebody in a loving way says, you know, you really shouldn't do that or you really shouldn't say that, then the Bible says we just flat out don't know who we are.
And that everything we feel about ourselves is based on how everybody views us and sees us and our own perfection. And it's just a big mess.
How many of you are tired of living in that mess?
Believing God More Than Your Feelings
This is the work that God requires of you, that you believe on the one. Do you have any idea how it delights God when you just believe what He said more than you believe how you feel? How much longer are you going to let your feelings be the God of your life?
Are you going to keep bowing down to how you feel? Or are you going to say, it really doesn't matter how I feel because feelings come and go. They're there when you don't want them. They go away when you do want them. You never know what they're going to do from one day to the next.
Feelings Don't Determine Righteousness
I mean, there's a lot of people out there that are just an absolute unbelievable mess. And they don't see anybody's faults—they see everybody's faults but their own. So just because they feel smug and self-righteous, that doesn't mean that they're right with God.
And just because you feel guilty, that doesn't mean that you are. I'm trying to tell you today that if you feel guilty, but you have sincerely repented for your sins, then that feeling that you have is an outright lie from the pit of hell. Because it does not agree with the Word of God.
Choosing God's Word as Your Standard
And we're either going to let this be the standard for our life or we are going to stay miserable. Well, Joyce, how long will it take me to get over feeling this way? You know, a while. I don't know. A while. Some longer than others. You don't even need to be worrying about that.
Well, how long is this going to take and how hard is it going to be? It's not going to be any harder than what you're doing now. And at least if we start doing the right thing, we're making some kind of progress.
Progress From Glory to Glory
From glory to glory, little by little, He delivers us from our enemies. Don't be so upset about how far you have to go. Be excited about how far you've come. My gosh, I've come a long way. Whoo! Hallelujah!
Now, the Bible teaches us that the Word of God is the sword of the Spirit. And this is your weapon against the devil. The Word of God is like a two-edged sword dividing soul and spirit.
Wielding the Sword in Spiritual Warfare
In Ephesians 6, a chapter in the Bible about spiritual warfare, it talks about wielding, using the sword of the Spirit. So, the devil says, you're not, you're not, you're not.
And you're either going to agree with him and say, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. And then to make it worse, sometimes then we even go to lunch with somebody and say, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. Just agreeing with the devil, everything he says, just agreeing with him. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. I'm not, I'm not.
Declaring Who You Are in Christ
But a spiritually mature person will say, let me tell you what I am. You don't need to waste your time anymore telling me what I'm not, because I know what I'm not in the flesh, but I know who I am in the Spirit.
And here's what I am. I am the righteousness of God in Christ. I am forgiven. I am anointed. I am a child of God. I am forgiven.