Bill Johnson - Relationships That Bring Out Your Best and Cover Your Blind Spots
If I’m not administrative, then I’m going to make sure I bring administrative people into this organization. If I’m not good at foresight, then I’m going to have those who are very intuitive around me. The point is that we want to make up for what we’re lacking. In the body of Christ, we are connected to people who will not only bring our strengths to the surface but also help us see our blind spots.
Hey there, welcome back! I’m glad you’re able to join us in this pursuit of wisdom—the lifestyle of wisdom—not just insight for specific problems, but actually partnering with Christ. The mind of Christ becomes revealed in and through us until it actually impacts the course of history for everyone under our influence. That’s my prayer. That’s a mouthful right there, but it truly reflects the heart of God for each of us.
I have an interesting verse, and I’m trying to pull a verse or two from a particular chapter that we look at every week. We’re going to start with just one and then create the context. It’s in Proverbs Chapter 5, verse 14—a very sobering verse: «I was on the verge of total ruin in the midst of the assembly and congregation.» Think about that: I was on the verge of total ruin, at the point of collapse, loss, death, despairing of life itself, in the middle of the congregation. This is a huge subject and certainly bigger than we have time for today.
Let me say this: there really is safety in numbers, and it’s not just being in the room with people; it’s being connected to people. In this context, we have someone who hated correction. If you look at the preceding verses, he says in verse 12, «How I have hated instruction! My heart despised correction. I have not obeyed the voice of my teachers nor inclined my ear to those who instructed me.» It is in that context of being resistant to input that enables someone to die alone in the middle of a crowd.
There is a very unusual warning regarding the relational component that exists in each of our lives. This warning illustrates how you can be associated in a sense of being in the right church, the right small group, or the right business with all the right people. However, if you have that mindset in your heart where you hate correction and don’t want to receive things that will adjust your life for the better, if that’s your posture, you can die alone in a crowd. You can run out of gas right in the middle of a fuel station, not knowing how to draw from the life of the people put into your life to make you stronger, healthier, and better.
We are made much more complete. The scripture makes it clear: we are individually members of one another, members of a body. There’s a seamless connection from my finger to my hand to my wrist to my arm to my shoulder—my torso. The whole point is that there’s a seamless connection of every part of the body, and it’s the same in the church. By design, we have been created to have meaningful relationships that make us better. I’m better because I have certain people in my life, and it’s not just those who flatter; it’s also those who challenge me.
One of the most amazing things I’ve seen in the Bible is when it talks about a husband or wife, saying, «I will make a help meet for her.» I used to think that the Lord created a wife to be a helper to the husband, assisting him in what he was designed to do. There’s certainly that element for both of us going in both directions, where we have a role of support for each other. But that word is different than what I thought. «Helpmeet» is a word God uses to describe himself in relation to Israel; He is not one who comes under control and influence but one who completes Israel.
What this word actually means is that a wife who is a help meet is fully equipped to stand with her husband face to face, making up for what he lacks. That’s the essence of relationships—we connect with people who are strong where we are weak. Any president of a country, any CEO of a corporation, or any person with a club or gathering attracts people who are strong where they are weak. If I’m not administrative, I’m going to ensure I bring in administrative people. If I’m not good at foresight, I’ll surround myself with those who are intuitive and see things that someone like me might miss. The point is that we want to make up for what we’re lacking.
In the body of Christ, we are connected to people who will not only bring our strengths to the forefront but help us see our blind spots. Here we have a dangerous warning: «I was in total ruin in the middle of the crowd, in the assembly, the congregation.» I remember hearing a quote from the late comic genius Robin Williams. I won’t get it exactly right, but it was something like this: «The worst thing in the world is not to be alone, but actually to be with people who make you feel alone.»
It’s easy to have surface-level interactions—shake a hand, high-five, and go our way—without any meaningful exchange. I’m naturally shy and must purposefully engage by making eye contact when I ask someone how they’re doing. I wait to hear and ensure I understand what they’re saying. Yesterday, a good friend said she was doing okay. I asked, «Just okay?» She then went on to tell me about a close friend who had just lost their baby.
There’s the opportunity to connect and partner at that moment. We don’t get the chance to connect meaningfully with every person, but we can find someone. I remember years ago, a group of people visited the church, and one man had a severe back issue. I barely knew him, but we prayed for him, talked, and ministered to him. I saw him again about two years later, and I recalled his back issue. I wasn’t trying to impress him; I was genuinely interested. When I asked, «How’s that back issue?» he was shocked anyone remembered. That’s what meaningful connection is about—eye-to-eye connection and concern.
We can’t fix everything, but we’re connected to a Father who has all the answers. While I may not be able to give you the $100,000 you need or fix the cancer in your body, I can pray, and I’m connected to a Father who has unlimited resources. Yes, He can, and together we will pray. Being in the middle of the congregation is meant to mean something. I encourage you to ensure you’re connected to people in a meaningful way. I bless you with that in Jesus' wonderful name. In our next session, we’re going to look at Chapter 6 and take a quick look at how wisdom affects our entire well-being. It should be fun, so join us!