Philip Anthony Mitchell - How Should we Honor (01/25/2026)
Introduction and Welcome
Jesus has no rival, and He has no equal. There is nothing that’s any match for His name. For those of us who belong to Him, no matter what we endure, no matter what we go through—Jesus has no rival. No trial in this life, no problem, no circumstance—not even death—there’s no match for Jesus. He will receive glory in all things.
Man, if you’re here for the very first time, if you’re visiting us, or if you’re watching me or listening right now on podcast—we want to welcome all of you to Victory Church and welcome you to what is the last installment of our series called With Honor.
This is a series that has been born out of just a personal concern of mine for the gradual erosion of what I think is a very important virtue. It’s a virtue that affects all of our relationships—it affects our relationship with God. It’s a virtue that I see is dying and being lost in our generation, our society.
And when that virtue does not operate—the opposite of that virtue, dishonor—is very painful, and it causes us a lot of loss and grief and heartache and pain. And I know that I’m not the only one that’s been on the opposite end of dishonor and knows what that disrespect feels like.
And it’s something that I will fight for, and that I will teach my children about, and I will die doing all that I can, growing to be a man of honor, man of integrity.
Series Recap
In week one, we taught a message called Where Is the Honor? You can go back and listen to that message on our podcast, where we defined what honor is and talked about the blessings of honor.
In week two, last week, we talked about who deserves honor—that the Scripture tells us that there are eight categories of people, eight individuals who specifically deserve honor. And when we dishonor those individuals, we dishonor God.
And I want to close out this series with the final message, the final installment: How should we honor God? Where is the honor? Where has it gone? Why is it lost in our generation?
Last week we talked about eight people who deserve honor. And I want to land the plane or close out this sermon series with this final message: How should we show honor? What does that look like practically?
Prayer
Eternal God and ever-wise Father in heaven, we your sons and daughters—and those who are still far from you—have gathered here in this moment to open your Word and to hear from your Spirit concerning this final thought about this powerful virtue.
That is laced as a theme from the beginning of the record of what you have done in the earth—from the days of Genesis until the record of the return of your Son in the Book of Revelation. God, this theme is laced throughout the entire Scripture—how important, how valuable it is.
God, I pray now just in this moment that the weight and the gravity of this subject matter would just rest on our hearts as we prepare to walk out of this series. I pray that we will not leave this teaching, but that in wisdom, with attentiveness, we would grab hold and that we would apply and that we would see the fruit thereof of this teaching.
Father, I pray even as the people leaned forward as Ezra the priest stood on a wooden platform and read the Book of the Law—I pray your people will lean forward, attentive now, God, to hear what you want to say to them.
And I pray, God, for my brothers and sisters—and those who are still far from you—that we will be transformed in this moment. Minister to us, God, in Jesus' mighty name we pray, amen.
That is laced as a theme from the beginning of the record of what you have done in the earth—from the days of Genesis until the record of the return of your Son in the Book of Revelation. God, this theme is laced throughout the entire Scripture—how important, how valuable it is.
God, I pray now just in this moment that the weight and the gravity of this subject matter would just rest on our hearts as we prepare to walk out of this series. I pray that we will not leave this teaching, but that in wisdom, with attentiveness, we would grab hold and that we would apply and that we would see the fruit thereof of this teaching.
Father, I pray even as the people leaned forward as Ezra the priest stood on a wooden platform and read the Book of the Law—I pray your people will lean forward, attentive now, God, to hear what you want to say to them.
And I pray, God, for my brothers and sisters—and those who are still far from you—that we will be transformed in this moment. Minister to us, God, in Jesus' mighty name we pray, amen.
How should we show honor? Thank you, Frank. Thank you, George. Thank you, Lawrence. Thank you, Gent.
The Greatest Blessing
I am 38 years old at the time of this recording. And as I am growing in wisdom and growing in age, I’m learning in life that while there are a lot of things that we label as blessings—we label houses as blessings and we label a lot of tangible things as blessings—as I’m growing in age, I’m learning that perhaps the greatest blessing that we would ever have in this life is when God would providentially allow our path to cross paths with those who would go on to have a great impact in our lives.
And when God in His providence will allow people to come into your life or to cross your path who will have some impact on the story of your life—that when you look back over your life, whatever age you are, you will be able to mark certain individuals who came into your life, whether for a moment or whether for a season or whether for a particular reason.
You will mark certain individuals who came into your life, and when you look at the impact that person has had in your life, you realize how God used them to further something in your life.
And for all it’s worth, I think oftentimes we tend to either dishonor those relationships or not value or appreciate those relationships or to take for granted the men and women, the people that God providentially allows to enter into our lives.
That some sister, some brother came into your life, and as a result they changed the trajectory of your life, or they changed the way that you thought about a particular thing, or they helped further you in Christian maturity.
And it’s so easy for us to take those relationships for granted or to either disrespect them or dishonor them. And I’m realizing that those are one of the greatest blessings we will ever have in this life.
Honoring Richard and Charity
And in this final message of this series, I want to take time to close out this series and at the same time honor someone who has had a great impact in my life.
Last year, my wife and I had the awesome privilege, the honor, of walking into Josiah—my youngest son—walking into school. And in his class was a little girl—her name was Abigail, her name was Abby.
Her parents came in, and my wife and I had the awesome honor and privilege of meeting her parents in that classroom and conversing with her parents.
And for us, it was a great honor and a privilege because what we did not know—that the people we were talking to were missionaries. And for my wife and I, they were the very first missionaries we had ever met in our entire lives.
And not missions in the sense of just take a trip to Jamaica and feed people and come back—but missionaries in the sense that they knew they were born to give their lives for the good of other people.
And we began to build a relationship with this couple—Richard and Charity Gerber are their names. And we would talk to them on the phone, and we would communicate with them across text, and we would spend time with them.
And we began to build this awesome relationship with Richard and Charity Gerber—the first missionaries my wife and I had ever met.
And as we began to sit down and talk to them and listen to them tell us their story—that they were not just missionaries to a comfortable place like maybe a beautiful tropical island—but they were missionaries to the distant island of Madagascar off the coast of Africa.
And not just missionaries to a civilized city in Madagascar—Madagascar is on the other side of the world, at the bottom of the world, just off the coast of Africa.
And not just missionaries to a city in Madagascar—but missionaries to an unreached people group on the island of Madagascar. That is a group of people living in a bush who had never even heard the name of Jesus, had never even seen a Christian church.
Had not had the privilege of us very prideful and arrogant Americans who have the liberty of walking into Christian churches and sitting down in comfortable chairs with air conditioning—who hear the name of Jesus on podcasts, on YouTube, in books, in conferences—and still dishonor Him and still don’t appreciate Him.
But a people sent to a people who had never even heard the name of Jesus, had never even seen a Christian church. Men and women living like heathens in a bush far away—in fact, 24 hours from the closest civilized town—in a bush, living off the land.
And it’s to that place that they went to spread the glorious Gospel of Jesus. It took 24 hours by plane to get to the town where they went to reach this unreached people group—24 hours by plane—in a place where there’s no medicine, no modern structures, no modern anything, no electricity—24 hours from the closest civilized town.
And they flew into a bush and landed there with his wife and gave birth to four children there and began to spread the Gospel there and won people to Jesus there. And one by one they kept winning people to Jesus there and gave birth to a Christian church in a bush.
We’re fighting people over here to just come to church—and they’re in the middle of a bush risking their lives amongst a hedonistic people—having to learn the Malagasy language to communicate with them who Jesus was—Jesus we’ve never heard of.
And they built a church there and did not have the resources in themselves to support the continuing mission of that church—and was aligned with a Baptist mission organization and began to raise missionary support to continue their work in Madagascar.
My wife and I have been spending time—my wife and I, by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, will now enter into partnership with them to help them further the work of the Gospel in Madagascar.
And so a percentage of everything—a percentage of every dollar that comes into this church—goes out to the missions work that is happening in that bush in Madagascar.
I said a percentage of every dollar that comes into this church goes into the work of saving souls and winning people to Jesus on the other side of the world in Madagascar.
That when we say we’re serious about the spread of the Gospel—we’re not just talking about preaching inside of a high school to people who already know the name of Jesus—but we’re talking about putting our money where our mouth is to make sure those who have never even heard His name have an opportunity to hear about the cross and a Man who died on that cross.
And that if you would put your trust in Him, you will not only suffer in this bush but you can live with purpose now and enter into a place called eternal life.
That we’re not going to just bring in money and hoard that for ourselves. And so thank you for every tither and thank you for every person that gives and thank you for every person that generously gives into this church—because your money is not just going to what we’re doing here—but man, every dollar that comes in, a percentage goes out to what’s happening in Madagascar.
And Charity, while they’re out there, would fall sick to cancer—felt a lump in her breast—her lymph nodes got swollen—and there was no modern medicine out there in the bush.
And so her husband Richard packed up his family—flew 24 hours to the nearest town—and they hopped a three-hour flight to the United States—and she came here for cancer treatment at Emory University.
Reflecting on Loss
So this week—this week my wife and I—my wife and I lost a friend this week. My wife and I lost a friend who was only 36 years old and was survived by her husband and five children—all under the age of 10.
And you know, I wrestle with that because you know—as a pastor—how do you explain that to someone who may not even believe in God? You got people who blaspheme God living into long ages—the grace of God, I had to understand, keeping them alive long enough to give them an opportunity to repent.
I said God, how could you—how could you take a 36-year-old woman who was in the middle of a bush giving her life to spread the Gospel to an unreached people group?
How does a pastor of a church with five little children—how does he pick up the pieces from that now? His wife—the primary translator of the language—the homeschooler of these children—she homeschools these children—and she is the primary translator of the Malagasy language in their ministry.
And I say to myself—and I sit there when I heard the news this week—in my car—my wife and I sat in the garage and we wept. And I wrestle with God—how do you call someone like that home now? Why not let her stay longer to continue to reach more people?
Like what do you tell these children—that their mother who was sacrificing her life for the good of the Gospel is now gone? What do you tell them?
What do we tell someone who doesn’t believe that God is loving and that He is just? Like how do you reconcile the death of a 36-year-old?
Like when a person is old—like my father died on a Saturday and I had to get up and preach on a Sunday morning—led my sister Mary—I had to get up and lead worship on a Sunday—but he was at a ripe old age, well into his 70s.
And when a person in old age dies, we almost can accept that a little bit easier than when a child dies or when a young person dies—it’s a very difficult thing to accept.
We think man, how was this person’s life cut short? Why couldn’t they live to get their three score and 10? Why couldn’t they live into their 70s? How was this life cut short?
And I wrestle with that this week—Lord, how could you take this person at 36 years of age? God, like what happened?
And knowing that some way, somehow God will get the glory out of her life. And as I sat and thought about that—a 36-year-old was cut off from the earth—a 36-year-old died, was transitioned to heaven—man, that thing gave me pause.
It gave me pause like man, she was 36—and it gave me pause to think about what am I doing and what am I worried about that’s not going to matter—and what are you worried about that’s not going to matter.
And what am I doing with the days that God has given me—and how many things am I involved in that’s not going to matter—and where am I giving myself to things that’s not going to matter—and what am I stepping over right now today that matters right now.
And I wrestled with that for days—even this morning in my prayer—man, wrestling with the death of my friend.
And Charity was such an honorable woman—one of the most honorable women I’ve ever known.
And what I want to do with this last sermon—with the few moments that we have left—what I want to do—because I’m hurting—I want to take nuances of Charity’s life and glimpses from the Scriptures—and I want to weave in glimpses of Charity’s life into this final talk about how you show honor to other people.
That I want to do two things at the same time—I want to preach a sermon to my church and I want to honor my friend who died this week at the exact same time.
Scripture Foundation
And so the Scripture says in 1 Peter 2:17—Peter the apostle of Jesus wrote: Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, and honor the emperor.
So Peter wrote that we ought to show proper respect to everyone—that is, Peter wrote we are to honor every single person.
Now while the Scripture says that we are to honor people—but the Scripture does not teach us in great detail—it does not necessarily teach us how to honor people.
There are very few passages in the Scriptures that teach us this is how you honor—you will find very few passages in the Scriptures that say thou shalt honor this way.
And so while the Scripture commands us to honor—the Scripture doesn’t necessarily tell us how to honor. But I want to use glimpses from Charity’s life and accounts that I know personally from the Scriptures to give you what I think are five practical ways in which we demonstrate honor for other people.
Honor with Time
The first one is this: You can honor people with your time—you can honor with your time.
The most precious commodity that you and I have is our time—time—because once it’s gone, you will never get it back.
I shared that with you—and there are some things that increase the value of time. Age increases the value of time—and so the older a person gets, the more valuable their time is.
When I think about my favorite preacher Billy Graham—who was some 93 years old—his time now is more valuable because he is nearing glory. And so anybody who gets to sit with Billy Graham—that time now becomes more valuable because of his age.
Experience increases the value of time—that the more experienced someone is, the more knowledgeable someone is, the more someone is an expert in a particular area—their time becomes more valuable.
That there are people we admire and only wish we can sit with them for just a moment with just a pad of three questions—how much would that transform your life? Because if you learn things from people who are more experienced than you, it helps you to go further faster.
And so as people increase in experience, their time becomes more valuable. Position makes time more valuable—that as people are in upward positions above us, their time becomes more valuable—that when we sit with them, their time becomes more valuable.
Strength of schedule makes time more valuable—that when a person’s schedule is full—especially a person we hold in high esteem—it makes their schedule or their time more valuable.
Like there’s a young brother in this church—he says to me frequently: Pastor, man, when you have free time, man, I just want to hang out with you for just a little bit.
And I will say back to this brother—in love—I mean this is a brother I love dearly—my tears have fallen on the back of his neck during times of prayer—and I’ve said to him: I said young man, I don’t have free time.
I’m pastoring a growing church—I have a wife—I have four little children—and my daughters are very demanding—when I get to the door: Daddy, where you going? What time you’re coming back? Why are you always having meetings with church people?
And I know that they will only be small once—and I don’t get a do-over when it comes to those little people that God has given me.
And so as I have a big family and a growing church—I don’t have a lot of free time. In fact, in my personal world—if you saw my schedule from Monday to Sunday—the only free time I have is really after 9:30 p.m.—and at that point Lena wants that time.
And so I don’t have a lot of free time—and when someone doesn’t have a lot of free time, the moments you are with them are very valuable.
And so I tell this brother: Man, if I pause and talk to you for 5 minutes—man, value that time. If I see you outside in the parking lot and lay hands on you and pray with you—value that time. If you and I get to speak for a moment on a basketball court—value that time.
Instead of being mad about what I can’t give—man, you have to honor the little that I can give away—because I don’t have a lot of free time.
And so when a person’s schedule is full—the little that they can give away is very valuable. That’s why when you’re meeting someone who has a full schedule or is above you—you shouldn’t be late to the meeting—you should come with questions—you should not hold them longer than you have to—you have to learn to value people’s time when they have full schedules.
Another thing that increases the value of time is circumstances. Circumstances increase the value of time—like when a person is jammed up in a bad circumstance—man, and we don’t know how long they’re going to be here—that increases the value of their time.
When my father was dying of cancer three doors down from me—and I was his caretaker—changing his underwear and helping him use the restroom and picking him up and laying him in his bed—and when I was his caretaker—that time mattered more than any other time before because of his circumstance—that time was more valuable.
Jesus was God in the flesh—had a very full schedule—had people pulling on Him in every direction—but His time now becomes more valuable. We see glimpses of Him spending time with Mary, Martha, and Lazarus—they had a place prepared for Him—whenever He was in Bethany, He would go slip in and see them—how valuable was that time?
We see Him spending time with 12 men—He couldn’t spend time with everybody—the few times He could be with them in private—how valuable was that time?
And so we see glimpses of Jesus spending time with people—because He couldn’t give it away to everybody the same way.
I saw my friend Charity giving away quality time to her family—man, she devoted time to her family—time to her husband—time to those whom she loved—because I’m telling you when you’re in a box, what’s going to matter most is who you gave that time away to.
And you should start with the people in your house—she valued her time.
I want to show you the last time that we were with Charity—so there’s going to be a picture coming up on the screen of our families together in my home.
And this was what we didn’t know would be—this would be the last time we would see her alive. And this was the last time we were together—and we ate and we fellowshiped—and the kids ran around in the backyard and they played—and we sat and we talked about ministry and we talked about the future and we talked about Madagascar and we talked about plans we had for the future.
And in retrospect—how valuable was that time? How valuable were the conversations we had at that kitchen table? How valuable were the last things that we spoke to each other in that room?
And who are you honoring with your time? How often are we pushing off our children and pushing off those that we love—thinking we have all the time in the world to get to them?
How often do we say we’ll get to that—we’ll listen—we’ll get to this—this is our—we’ll take care of this child another time—don’t have time for the husband—don’t have time for the wife—don’t have time for the children—don’t have time for the friend?
How often do we push people away that we should be investing time in them—because we think that we have all the time in the world?
And we have to know that with this commodity that we have—that is fixed according to the Scriptures—the time that we have is fixed—God knows the day that you’re going to depart this world—and so your time is fixed.
And I want to encourage you to honor people who are close to you with your time—even I’m thinking about now—man, how often am I too busy to spend time with Malachi, Israel, Abigail, and Josiah?
How often am I too busy to slow down and spend time with my wife? How often am I at the kitchen table having dinner with my family and on the phone at the same time handling church business?
How often are you in the presence of people you love and on the phone at the same time?
And so one of the ways you honor people—you honor them by giving away that precious gift that you can’t get back—by being careful and strategic about giving away your time—especially with those that you love—husbands with your wives—wives with your husbands—parents with your children.
Because you’re not guaranteed to have them always. And so we want to honor people with our time—we show honor by granting time to others when we can—and we show honor by respecting the time of others when it is granted to us.
Honor with Words
The second way we can honor people is we honor people with words—we honor people with words—audible praise that is heartfelt—to speak well of other people as a form of showing honor.
When you speak well of another human being—that is a form of honoring that person. We show honor to God and we show honor to other people when we speak highly of them.
What does it do in the heart of a wife when the husband speaks honorably of his wife—or when she goes on her social media during her lunch break and her husband was bragging on her during that day—what does that do in her heart? Man, her heart blows up with favor—she’s going to hook him up when she comes home—he might get a good—y’all minds are in the gutter—he might get a good meal that night.
Sometimes public honor translates into private favor. You start speaking well of your boss on the job—and watch what happens in his heart for you—when you’re in the break room and everybody’s cussing out the boss—you start speaking well of him—and watch what happens.
We honor people when we speak well of them—audible praise. Honor is not just—it doesn’t terminate in the heart—honor leaves the heart and goes out of the mouth.
In fact, the Bible teaches us—we taught a series through James—and the Bible teaches in James—when Elder Milton was teaching through James—that with the same mouth we either bless or curse human beings—and we should use this tongue to bless other people and to honor other people with our words.
That doesn’t mean you don’t say hard things to people—but we want to use our words to honor other people.
I watched Charity honor other people with her words—she would honor her pastor—she would honor other missionaries—she would honor her husband with her words—she would honor her children—speaking well of other people—she—honor was always flowing out of her mouth all the time—so much so honor was flowing out of her mouth—man, she honored God like almost no one I’ve ever met.
She was the kind of woman—you would come into her presence and leave convicted—coming out of her presence you were—come into her presence and nothing negative would ever come out of her mouth—speaking well of her husband Richard—speaking well of her children—speaking well of her pastor—speaking well of other missionaries—speaking well of the church that they planted in Madagascar—honor flowing out of her mouth.
So we honor people with our words—that there were a lot of things that I felt about Charity that I never said to her—and when I went to her funeral I said all these things to her family members—and I was so convicted about that—because I thought to myself why do we wait until someone is in a box to tell them the things we should have told them when they were alive?
That all these things I felt about her—things that the ways that she impacted my life—I’m telling these things to her brother and I’m telling these things to other people—and I’m thinking to myself why do we wait until people are in a box before we properly honor them?
You know when is the time to honor people—not when they are in a box—the time to honor the people you love is when you have them—is when they’re in your presence—to speak to your children—instead of cussing them out—to tell your wife you love her—instead of tearing her down—to tell your friends you appreciate and value that relationship—instead of waiting to a box—and then we’re standing over the box with tears honoring them.
Why do we only honor people at funerals and not honor them when we have them? So we should honor people with our words—but not wait until they die to do that—but honor people with your words right now.
Honor with Deference
A third way we honor people—we honor people with deference—we honor other human beings with deference.
And this is very difficult especially in our culture—because we by nature as Americans are very self-absorbed and self-consumed.
Deference is discerning those moments in which we put someone else before ourselves. It is discerning in this moment to let this person go ahead of me—we don’t do that in traffic, right? Y’all know how this goes—I’ve talked about this at this church—you see them at the corner of your eye trying to get in—and the traffic moves up a foot and you move up a foot—and you see them trying to get in—y’all looking at me like you’ve never done this before.
Or how about when we knock people over to get to the front of a line—or how about we push our way to the front of someplace and don’t let—Deference is knowing in this moment to let this person go ahead of me.
Deference is knowing in this moment—let me consider this person ahead of myself. Deference is knowing in this moment—what is the will of this person is more important than my will in this moment.
Deference is crucifying my desire for the good of someone else—why—see you’re not going to say amen or clap because we don’t like the word crucify, right?
Deference is crucifying my pride and my will for the good of what will happen in a marriage when they show deference to one another—how many relationships are stressed because we don’t show deference—how many marriages are stressed because there’s a person in that marriage that is so selfish that all they’re worried about is themselves?
You want to see a relationship transform—outdo one another with deference—fight to put the other person ahead of yourself.
I like how John the Baptist—who was the forerunner of Jesus’s ministry—he was blowing up—like his ministry was blowing up—baptizing people—people coming from far places to see him—but then a greater shows up on the scene.
And when the greater shows up on the scene—people begin to leave John’s church—and then they begin to head over to Jesus’s church—even his disciples left him and went over to Jesus.
And people came to John and they said yo John, what’s up—people are leaving your church—they’re going over to Jesus’s church.
You know what John said? John said I must decrease and He must increase. You know what John did? He showed deference in that moment for the One who was greater and for the will that was more important than his will.
That although my thing is blowing up—this thing over here is more important—let me lay down what I’m doing over here to be a part of what’s happening over there.
You know this is a problem especially in the black community—with such crabs in a bucket—everybody wants a platform—everybody wants a stage—we don’t know how to bow down or sacrifice to be a part of something—because you will accomplish more as a team than you will by yourself.
And sometimes we got to be mature enough to know in this season—let me show deference in this season—let me lay down what I want to do to help further something that is much bigger than me right now in this season.
For eight years serving other men—I showed deference—I knew God was calling me to start a church—I put that on a shelf and served other men—four of them—for 8 years—to give myself to their work—deference—putting aside what I wanted to do—what I was called to do—for the good of what was more important in the moment.
I see people all the time—you are struggling trying to do your own thing—maybe it’s not the season for you to do your own thing—maybe it’s the season for you to be a part of something bigger than your thing—and as you show deference to that in this season—you will reap a harvest for your thing in another season.
The apostle Paul—he wrote something—and before I read what he wrote—you know I think about my friend Charity—man, she showed deference like almost no person I’ve ever known—man, she was always laying her life down for other people.
In fact, on her deathbed—you know what Charity said on her deathbed moments before she died? She said on her deathbed moments before she died—she said—and I quote—I hope people are as concerned about the believers in Madagascar as they are about my illness.
She is dying—and knows she’s moments from departing life—and she’s not worried about herself in that moment—instead she’s thinking about all those Africans in that Madagascar church—who they’re not there with right now—the church struggling trying to stay afloat in the absence of their leaders.
And she said all these people worried about me about to die—I hope that they are equally concerned—even more concerned—about the believers in Madagascar as they are about my illness.
Instead of sucking up the glory for herself in that last moment—she’s deflecting that towards the believers on the other side of the world.
The apostle Paul wrote something about this to the church in Philippi in Macedonia—in Philippians chapter 2:3 and 4—he says: Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit—rather, in humility value others above yourselves.
That’s hard for us to do—not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.
He says to Christians—don’t live self-centered—but instead value others even above yourselves—consider the interests above others.
I want to show you one of the greatest examples of deference I’ve ever known in my life—so there’s a picture coming up on the screen—the last picture that Charity ever took in this life.
This was the last photograph she was ever in—with her and her husband and their newborn baby Kezia.
You know what the doctors told her when she got pregnant with this baby? They told her—they said Charity, you need to terminate this pregnancy—you need to get rid of this child—Charity—cuz they said we cannot treat your cancer while this baby is in your womb.
And they fought her to terminate this baby. You know what Charity decided to do? She told them I can’t do that—because she valued that life that was inside her.
And so she fought them to the point they got so mad they stopped giving her treatment—she had to go to a free clinic to get treatment while she was pregnant with this baby.
And by the time little Kezia was born—man, the cancer in Charity’s body had completely destroyed her liver—had spread into every bone in her body.
We look back now and think that God had supernaturally kept her alive long enough to give birth to this little girl.
And what Charity did in this moment was one of the greatest examples of deference—she literally gave her life—she gave birth—two weeks later she was gone—she sacrificed herself for that unborn child.
You named that—Charity—the name of one of Job’s daughters—even after God had restored all that to him.
And while the doctors told her you will die—you will die if you keep this baby—they fought her—you will die if you keep this baby—gave birth to this baby and trusted God with my life.
Kezia is here—Charity is in the presence of the Most High—one of the greatest acts of deference I’ve ever known.
What do we sacrifice for our children? What do we sacrifice for the loved ones—the people around us who matter most? Where are we showing deference to care for the will of others above ourselves?
When we lay down our lives—the Scripture says no greater love than this—that we will lay down our life for our brother or sister.
Honor by Serving
The fourth way we show honor is with serving—we show honor by serving other people.
At the funeral yesterday—one of the pastors said that Richard had been comforted by a number of Scriptures—and one of the Scriptures that had comforted him—I want to read to you one of those Scriptures.
It was John 12 verses 25-26: Anyone who loves their life will lose it—while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.
Whoever serves me—Jesus says—must follow me—and where I am, my servant will be also. My Father will honor the one who serves me.
And I’m thinking to myself—how is this passage strengthening this man after the death of his wife—to think that man—if it was somebody else—maybe they go to the Book of Psalms and they’ll have a Scripture in Psalms that talks about comforting yourself.
But he’s comforted in a passage that talks about giving your life for the good of other people—giving your life for the service of Jesus—and knowing that any person who gives their life for the service of Jesus—that God will honor that person.
That he is comforted in knowing that the life of his wife was given for the glory of Jesus—and as a result now she has been honored by God.
That when he looked at her death—he wasn’t just trying to comfort himself in his pain—but was comforted in the fact that her life was totally surrendered—totally given over to God’s work—totally abandoned for God’s work.
And in that he found comfort—that although my wife has transitioned to glory—she has left behind a legacy that she totally abandoned her personal will for the good of serving our Savior.
That Charity was totally divorced from her personal will—totally abandoned for God—she wasn’t entering into His presence with this laundry list of what she wants—nor did she turn God into a genie.
And in her death—man, I thought about this—because even her death she convicted me again—she would convict me when I was in her presence.
I thought to myself—man, all the things that I’m asking God to do for me—and mad about what He won’t do for me—and the Lord the Holy Spirit had to punch me in my soul and rebuke me and remind me—you have been bought.
The Holy Spirit had to remind me this week in my tears thinking about Charity—you have been bought, Philip—I own you—I paid for you with the blood of my Son—you have no right to grumble and murmur against what I’m not doing in your life.
And if you are a Christian—if you are a follower of Jesus—you have been purchased by the blood of Jesus—you have been bought—you have been rescued from the wrath to come—you don’t have a right to tell God no—and you don’t have a right to be mad about what He won’t do in your life.
The last person I tried to argue with God—Job—that didn’t go too well. And God had to crush me this week in my prayer time and remind me I don’t have a right to be arguing with Him about what He won’t do in my life.
I have been purchased—and my will must be surrendered to His will—that my life is given for His will—that is not my will—whether He does it or not—whether He opens up the door or not—whether He says yes or not—whether I have to suffer with this or not.
If you are a Christian—you have been purchased. You said man I don’t—listen—you’ve been purchased—bought by the blood of Jesus—your life belongs to Him—for His service in this life—for the reward that’s coming in the next life.
A lot of us—you know why we’re frustrated—because we’re pounding on heaven with a laundry list of all the stuff that we want that God won’t do—when He’s trying to get you—it’s not about what you want—it’s about what I have for you.
And what if His will doesn’t look like your will? But we’re fighting for all the rewards now—and those rewards—all of them may not come now—like for Charity—she was working on a novel—that reward is not going to come now—but her rewards she has received now in glory.
Honor with Giving
And the last way we honor people is with giving—we honor with time—we honor with words—we honor with deference—we honor by serving other people—serving God—we honor with giving.
Scripture teaches us—the Bible says honor God with your wealth—is one of the only places we are told how to honor—it’s one of the few places in the Bible you will find how to honor people—says honor God with your wealth.
We honor people with giving—we can honor people by putting in their hands monetary gifts—tangible gifts—we honor God by giving things away to other people—we honor God by giving.
Every time we give to someone with a good heart—we honor people by giving away things that are tangible.
I think for me—one of the greatest demonstrations of giving I ever saw in terms of honoring people—was when I was in Bible college—there was an 80-year-old man who had traveled the world preaching the Gospel—planted churches—he had sacrificed his life for the glory of Jesus—he had led so many people to God—had discipled young men.
He was old and he was decrepit—hair white—body frail—and he came in on the arms of other men into my Bible college—and they sat him down in a chair—his legs were so weak.
And so he preached to us from a chair. And when the sermon was over—the elders of the Bible college said we’re going to honor the man of God.
And you know we’re broke college students—and he says you know I’m just asking everybody right now to sow a seed into this man of God for his ministry—we’re going to sow into him.
And one by one students began to get up—and they came with dollar bills and change—and he sat there on the chair—and they came and they would drop it at his feet—you would hear change hit the stage—and you see a crumpled up dollar bill hit the stage—and maybe there was a 20 in there—we were broke—we didn’t have no money.
And my wife and I get up—and we took the little bit that was in our pocket—and then I walked up there and threw it at that man of God’s feet.
And one by one students were coming and dropping things at his feet. And I remember there was a brother in this Bible college—his name was Jeremy—he was the twin brother of our lead photographer Jermaine.
And I remember watching in the back—I saw Jeremy standing in the back up against a wall—and he felt bad that he didn’t have anything to give the man of God—he didn’t have anything to honor him.
And I watched Jeremy—he stood there with tears in his eyes—because he so desperately wanted to show the man of God honor.
And Jeremy had a nice wardrobe—so Jeremy stood there with tears in his eyes—and he refused to let that moment pass him by—he had on a very expensive tie that day in Bible college.
Jeremy—he took that tie—I remember I stood back and I watched Jeremy take that tie off his neck—because of honor—he valued the ministry of that man of God—he valued that preacher.
And here was a man who had traveled the whole world preaching the Gospel—he valued that man’s ministry so much—he took off that expensive tie from his neck—and he folded that tie in his arms.
And I stood back and I watched as Jeremy walked down the aisle of that church—the last person in the room—and he went to the feet of that elder—and he knelt down at the feet of that elder—and he took his tie—he laid his tie at the feet of that 80-year-old man.
And one of the greatest demonstrations of honor I’ve ever seen in my life—that though he didn’t have a dollar in his pocket—he still wanted to honor this man of God—laid his tie at this man of God’s feet.
And I can only imagine in the heart of that man of God—what that old decrepit man of God must have felt as he sat there in that chair and watched a young man in his 20s walk down the aisle and lay at his feet that tie.
Can you imagine what would have happened in that man’s heart—watching this kid bring him this tie? You think that elder ever forgot that moment?
Greater than an 80-year-old preacher—we have a King—what are we laying at His feet? What are we clutching so tight that we can’t let go?
For some of us you need to lay your past at His feet and honor and walk into the future of what He’s calling you to. For some of us you need to lay that excuse at His feet and walk into the calling that He’s calling you to.
For some of us—that lower case g—that god of money that has a grip on your heart—we need to learn to tithe first and lay that at His feet.
What do we have around our neck that we can lay down at the feet of our Savior? When was the last time He seen us approaching Him with a demonstration of honor? When was the last time anyone seen you approaching them with a demonstration of honor?
There are very few virtues greater than this—feel the weight of laying the tie at the elder’s feet—feel the weight of honoring a human being that way—feel the explosion of favor that comes from living a life that way.
That the demonstration of what Jeremy did with this old man should be the way that we live—with honor—honoring our God and our Savior—the Man who died to set us free.
Are we laying our gifts at His feet? Are we using our gifts for His glory? What are we laying at His feet? Have we laid our gifts at His feet? Have we laid our lives at His feet? Have we laid our hearts at His feet?
And I want to challenge you to not be disrespectful—immature—prideful—self-centered—self-absorbed people who call themselves Christians—embarrassing the One who died for us.
But I want to challenge you men and women of faith—I want to challenge you men and women of the faith—to be men and women of great honor—to show honor to the One who bled for you—to lay down at His feet your gifts and use it for His glory—to lay down at His feet that god of money and use it for His glory.
Laying Down Distractions
Maybe some of you will start doing that now—that we can help more people in Madagascar—to start laying down even the chains that—but you know what—you know what—you know what I had to lay down at His feet this week?
You know what I laid down at His feet this week? I laid down at His feet my asking for things concerning the ministry and issues that I realize are just distractions from what is really important.
And I laid down at the feet of my Savior this week—I said God you know I’ve been asking you for this—and you know what—at this point it doesn’t even matter to me anymore—this thing I’ve been asking for—if you don’t do this it doesn’t even matter to me anymore.
These problems I’ve been carrying—from issues in the church—you know what—I’m laying this down at your feet God—why am I carrying things that I’m not strong enough to carry when you said give them to you?
You know what—me being worried about this or that person—these are distractions Lord from what you’ve called me to do.
And you know what I laid down at God’s feet—I laid down at His feet this week everything that’s not going to matter in eternity—I laid it at His feet and I said God if this is not going to matter in eternity I’m laying it down at your feet.
I want my life to honor you in such a way that I give all for your glory—I’m going to love my wife better than I have before—I’m going to love my children better than I have before—cuz I don’t know how much time I have—you said tomorrow’s not promised to anybody God.
Everything that’s a distraction—I’m going to lay it down at your feet—is what I did. And I’m going to give myself to my family and give myself to the spread of the Gospel—and any person and anything that distracts me from that God—I’m laying it down at your feet—I’m leaving it on the altar right at your feet God—I’m going to honor you by leaving my heart there—is what I did this week.
And God had to remind me of something He said to me in August of 2014—and I was on my face in my office crying out to God—and He said to me—it was only the second time I ever heard Him speak like almost an audible voice—only two times in my 13 years of walking with Jesus I’ve heard Him speak almost like an audible voice.
The first time was at the age of 25 reading Proverbs 3:5-6 when God spoke to me that I will pastor a church named Victory.
And the second time I heard Him—August 2014—crying out to God—He said to me these words—He says my son make much of the name of Jesus and advance the Gospel until I call you home—and He stopped talking—that was it.
And all my fussing in that moment about what I want the church to be and what I want to accomplish—all that is sh—my son make much—He said—of Jesus—make much of His name and advance the Gospel until I call you home.
And in Charity’s death I was reminded that man I’ve been fussing and complaining and worried about things that don’t matter—man I’m laying those things at His feet.
I told my wife on Monday—I’m going to go get that tatted on my left arm—I’mma add some more ink to my arm—if you don’t like ink that’s your thing okay—I’m not going to apologize for what you—I have no conviction—I have—I’m going to put ink on my arm.
I’m going to write the last thing God said to me audibly on my arm—so that every time I start tripping over things that don’t matter—I’m just going to look down at my arm and remind—so Philip make much of the name of Jesus and advance the Gospel until I call you home.
Said pastor you shouldn’t be talking about tattoos—yeah Jesus has one on His thigh—that’s what the Scripture says—tatted on His thigh—written on His thigh it says King of Kings and Lord of Lords—so I’m going right for right now.
And I’m going to write on my arm on Monday—make much of the name of Jesus and advance the Gospel until I call you home.
And every time in my prayer time—in my car—in the office—if somebody sends me—every time somebody pisses me off—every time something comes to distract me—I’m going to look down at this arm and remind myself of what is important.
Because I realized so many of us Christians are busy worrying and doing and being about things that’s not going to matter.
So what do you need to lay down at His feet? Lay it down today—lay it down today.
That at the end of this message—I’m going to give us a moment to just pray—that I’m not going to pray for you—you’re going to sit there for just a moment of time—and maybe there’s something in your heart you want to lay down today—maybe you want to say something to the Lord who is listening today—Lord right now in your moment I honor you—I lay this down—I’m not picking it up God—I’m going to give you this.
For some of you it’s just your past—for some of you it’s an excuse—for some of you maybe it’s a dollar bill—I don’t know—lay it down—lay it down.
And let’s be men and women of honor—let’s honor those God has called us to honor—and above all let’s honor Him—and stop treating Him like He’s common or ordinary—and let’s stop treating the church of Jesus Christ like it’s common or it’s ordinary—and let’s be men and women of honor—let’s be men and women of honor.
This week I told you that honor flows in all directions of the cross—in week one I told you honor up—in week two I told you honor across—this week I want you to honor down—find people beneath you and honor them—honor your children—if you’re a team leader honor your team—if you’re a boss honor your whatever—whoever you choose—honor someone beneath you this week.
I’m getting ready to honor someone who’s been beneath me—one of the missionaries we support—three missionaries in our church—one has gone to heaven—two remain—one of those missionaries today is her last Sunday at this church.
She has come to my wife and I and asked for an honorable release to go serve at an Arabic church—to grow in that language in preparation for when God will send her out to the Muslims and those who are far away from God.
So we’re going to honor her right now—the elders and myself and prayer warriors—we’re going to lay our hands on her and we’re going to release her with honor the way it’s supposed to be done—and send her out as one of the missionaries from this house to go continue the work that God has done.
She served here faithfully for over a year—and we’re going to send her out to this Arabic church to grow with those believers there—some far away from God.
Caitlyn—would you join me right now on the stage?
Come on church—stretch your hands to Caitlyn right now and just bow your heads and pray for her okay—this is her last Sunday with us—she’s a missionary that we have been supporting financially—we’ve been supporting—and we’re sending her out right now to Arabic church to do the work of the Lord—and I want you to pray for her—I want you to stretch your hands as we prepare to pray for her right now.
Because Richard’s last request in the hospital when his wife died was that we would send no flowers to the funeral—which we did not—but he asked that the offerings coming in from the various churches that support him would go all to Madagascar in honor of his wife.
And so what I’m asking you to do this week—what I’m asking you to do just period—if you’re not a tither in this church—if you’re not a giver in this church and you belong to this family—I’m going to challenge you coming out of this series to start to honor God with your wealth and become a faithful giver.
And I want to say to you—I’m serious—that everything that comes in this week—online—phone—text—we’re going to take that and we’re going to send it to help the people in Madagascar.
And I’m not worried about our budget—whatever comes in for this offering—today’s offering—today’s offering we’re going to send 100% of today’s offering for the work of Madagascar—100% of it—none of it is going to stay in Victory.
So when you leave—you could go online and do your giving online—you could text gospel to 50155—you could do it at the kiosk in the lobby—you could do it in your car when you get home.
I’m asking everybody—I’m asking everybody—all of the giving from today’s offering—everything that comes in today—and by tomorrow this time—I’m sending 100% of it to help those people who are struggling in Madagascar—to help that church with medicine and with Bibles and with help and whatever they need—100% of it is going towards foreign missions in Madagascar.
So I’m asking everyone in this church to honor God by sowing an offering today—by this time tomorrow—24 hours—that we’re going to honor Richard’s last request for his wife—and 100% of it is going to leave this place—and we’re going to send it to help the believers in Madagascar—100% of it.