Michael Todd - The Disease of Double-Minded
I am grateful to be standing in this position 10 years later. To be honest with everybody, I didn’t know I would make it, but that’s what faith looks like. I would like to encourage everyone that usually when you ask God to do something in your life, He’s going to show you a picture and not the path, or He’s going to show you the path and not the picture because He wants you to trust Him. It would be a lot easier if He gave us the blueprint, the map—this is where you start and this is where you’re going to end. But if He did that, most of us would walk away from talking to Him, so He allows us to live a life dependent on Him. In 2014, when Bishop told me that his plan of succession was for me to become the lead pastor, I want you to know I was surprised. I wasn’t like, «Oh, bet! Been planning this in the background.» You know how people want something but act like they don’t? But they really are thirsty—yeah, yeah, yeah. I wasn’t thirsty at all; I had a plan, was about to execute it, and then God tapped me on the shoulder and said, «Hey, I have need of you.»
Today, I stand in this position humbled. The word I want to express is that I feel sober; I feel very aware that this is nothing but the hand of God. I feel that God has grown me in ways I could not have grown outside of this plan for my life. I am very aware that this ministry and this calling saved my marriage. See, a lot of the things we try to get out of are the very things that protect us. I want to say this to every young person: I still feel young, but I’ve done a lot—that’s because I said yes early. I want to be very clear that this lie that culture is trying to sell you—that you have an opportunity later to say yes to God—is going to make you miss the most vibrant years of serving Him. I feel like I just started, and it’s been a decade! I told the team, «I’m ready to run; what are we doing?» I feel like God has renewed my strength 10 years into being faithful, but at 38 years old, I can’t believe I started leading this church at 28! Bishop, what were you thinking? I really realize that God allowed my yes early to add years to my effectiveness for His kingdom, and so 10 more years seem like nothing.
Look at what God has already done this year! I just want to thank Transformation Church for being a church that is committed to representing God to the lost and found for one reason—transformation in Christ. So today, I told them I still have to preach. I said we can celebrate; we can pop confetti right after church. We have a party in the lobby; this is not a party you want to miss! We’ve flown in a DJ! I see some of y’all that don’t even know how to have fun anymore. You need to bring your rusty hips out! We have refreshments for you; we’re going to turn up, Transformation Nation! I thank you for being a part of what God’s doing. We’re going to celebrate, and I want anyone who has a memory of me and Pastor Natal, Bishop, and Pastor Debbie from over the years to flood social media today with memories of what God has done. Get old pictures when I used to have waves, pictures when Bishop had a different hairstyle, pictures of when Pastor Brenda was singing to him, «Who sits on the throne at a zoo?»
I just want old, new, and young—and not-so-young—pictures of all of us so we can remember because memory allows you to feel gratitude. Today, as we walk into this next piece of this sermon series, I just want to approach it with a lot of gratitude for people who have listened to me talk for 10 years. I used to get whoopings for talking too much—pink slips and principal notes. They didn’t know I was practicing for my destiny. I need a refund for all those whoopings; I need something—I need reparations! It’s Black History Month; I need some reparations! Today, as I stand here, I’m about to get to my message. I just want to thank you for listening because a lot of people can have something to say, but if they have nobody to listen, it actually falls to the ground. Today, the message that I’m going to speak to you comes out of this very sentimental, emotional, amazing moment we’ve been having, and I’m going to give you the word that I feel has to penetrate your heart. If you feel a switch, it’s because I feel celebrated—words of affirmation and all that.
Now I have an assignment, and because I have to deliver this assignment the way God told me to, I need everybody to prepare your hearts, get your notes ready, get your phone ready because I believe God’s going to speak to you, whether you’re in this room or online, about the trajectory of your life that may need to change. Today, somebody shout at me! Today! You didn’t shout at me; somebody shout at me! Today! I believe today is going to be a pivotal time in the life of anybody who watches this. So, I need us to go to our scripture of the year. We have decided that we are going to be focused this year. We are in week three of a series called «Death to Distraction: The Faith to Focus.»
How many people have an area in your life where it is just difficult for you to focus? Come on, we’re not going to talk about all the areas, but think of one area that’s hard for you to focus on. Like, anytime you try to do that, the smallest things come to take it—you don’t even have to be distracted by something outside of you. You’ll start thinking about the laundry you left on and haven’t ever cared about, «Where’s my yellow shirt?» Like, you can’t even fit it anymore! Every time you try to do that thing, it makes you lose focus. Let me be honest: for a very long time in my life—and I don’t know if there are any other believers or pastors who will admit this—anytime I tried to read the Bible, it was like my focus became so distracted. I mean, I could be okay. How many people have read, and you had to read it again because you didn’t know what you read?
Okay, I’m in the right room! A whole chapter done and you don’t know anything that you just read because while you were in the act, your mind was elsewhere. Could it be that the body of Christ and the world at large is suffering from distraction? It’s not that we don’t have enough time; it’s that we focus our time on things that do not flourish. It’s not that we don’t have enough attention; it’s that we give our attention to too many things, so nothing can actually grow. If we would be honest for a second, this year for me and for you will probably look like a repeat unless I put «death» to certain distractions—watch this—that have dominated me. Nobody wants to say it like that, but there are certain distractions in our lives that have dominated us for years. For me, a knife and a fork dominated me. I’m not talking about you; I’m talking about me. I planned when I was going to sleep based on the snack I was going to get and what time I could get it.
Okay, some of y’all—y’all okay? I used to have all my meetings as well as social events around food. I would be at five lunch meetings in a day because there’s no way we’re going to sit here and talk without a curly fry in my mouth! Come on! I used to be dominated by images of perversion. Nobody wants to talk about it, but there are a lot of things in your life. I used to be dominated by comparison—what are they doing so I can feel bad about what I’m not doing and what God hasn’t called me to do right now? Then I couldn’t do what He actually called me to do because I felt so low about what I’m not doing that isn’t like what they’re doing. It made sense. Roll it back—somebody yell at me! Distractions! I can’t tell you what your distractions are, but you sure do know them. You can ignore them, you can act like they’re not a part of you, but some of you are literally in the same place praying for something God cannot do until you put a death to those distractions.
And let me help you: He won’t do it. That’s right; you have to do it. He’s not going to take her away; you’re going to have to stop answering the phone. He’s not going to shut Facebook down; you have to log off. Netflix isn’t going to stop taking their dollar every month until you unsubscribe. I just want to let you know that your deliverance is going to come with the decision to put to death your distractions. So in this series, we’ve been studying Samson, but Samson didn’t have what we have. We have something to fix our eyes on, and so in the New Testament, in Hebrews 12:1, I’m going to read this scripture, and I want everybody to see this as our scripture of the year.
It says in Hebrews 12:1, «Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything—how many things? Everything! —that hinders, and the sin that so easily entangles us, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.» Watch this! «Fixing our eyes"—somebody shout at me! Focus! Focus right now! I’m focusing on the camera in front of me with the red dot, but it just moved, and if I keep looking at the camera that does not have the red dot, my focus is now on something that is distracting people because I’m focusing on what is not focusing on me. I could preach the rest of this message on praying and prophesying to something that is not focusing on me. Some of y’all say, «Just turn to the camera.» I wish it was that easy! Come on! I wish it was that easy, because right now there’s a camera here, there’s a camera there, and there’s a camera here. No, no, no, no! The camera came to me. But what if every time the camera comes to me, I look at a different camera?
Every time I’m focusing, I’m fixing my eyes on something that’s not fixed on me? The trouble is I’m doing what I think is right, but there’s a light trying to tell me where to look. Many times, we focus on the camera that’s moving and we don’t look for the lights. It’s been a minute and a half of me looking at the wrong cameras, but I’m still looking at cameras. God says, «Look to the light.» Yes! And when I look to the light—fixing my eyes on Jesus—I’m just trying to show everyone through a simple example that fixing your eyes on Jesus is the way that your focus will be put in the right perspective. What are you saying, Pastor Mike? Anything that’s going on in my life, I need to put it through the filter of what Jesus has said. If He had anything to say about it in His word, I need to actually put it through the filter of Jesus. Write this point down: «Fixing your eyes on Jesus gives you the faith to focus.»
At the top of this series, I did a vision message and told you that as this year progresses, the word of the year is «focus.» Everybody shout at me: Focus! Focus! Part of the way God confirmed it is that back in July, I had this obstruction come in my eye, and I love Transformation Church so much and Transformation Nation because I’ve received more DMs, emails, and phone calls than I can count. It’s like, «You never told us what’s going on with your eye. Are you okay? Can you see us? I’m praying for your eye.» We’ve had ophthalmologists reach out; we’ve had all kinds of people—no, I’m serious. That’s the thing I love about Transformation Church; they respond! But they were concerned, «Is the eye okay?» Well, let me tell you a little bit more about the story. I had this obstruction in my eye that came out of nowhere; it was a blood vessel that burst in my eye. I could not see properly.
There was something that was obstructing my focus. You couldn’t see it, but I could, and it was distracting me. I can’t tell you how many times I was driving and swerved, thinking that something was coming at me, but it was just something in my vision. So I went to the doctor because my wife does not play about me. I was just going to wait it out, you know, put some oil on it and keep rolling, but she said, «You’re going to put some oil on it and go to the specialist.» I said, «Yes ma’am, I’ll go to the specialist.» They put me through all these tests with lights and lasers and all this other stuff, and I’ve never had any problems with my eyes, so my eye is doing more work than it has ever done in its whole life. It starts giving me a headache. It’s just all of this stuff that’s going on, and then the doctor comes in to give me a diagnosis. I said, «Sir, what’s going on?»
This man began to speak a language that I did not understand. He began to explain things that I had never heard before and looked at me as if I was supposed to understand. Instead of trying to repeat it, I recorded everything so I want you to hear what the doctor told me my diagnosis was. Go ahead and put that on the camera. Fundoscopically, okay? Can you say what you think I have in my right eye again? Yeah, proliferative retinopathy, probably from your CLE cell trait. Got you. This is causing intraocular bleeding; that’s what’s causing you the symptoms of floaters and blurry vision. Your retina is overexpressing a protein hormone called Vaso endothelial growth factor. Uh-huh. Yeah.
So, the laser treatment actually changes the biochemistry of your retina and lowers the local expression of VEGF, and the KNE of vasostimulation should dry out. I know some of these words; I’m glad you went to school. Okay, okay, okay. What the heck am I supposed to do with that? At the end, I said, «Thank you for going to school,» and I dapped him up. After I recorded this video, I was about to leave the doctor’s office with a diagnosis that I didn’t understand. I was about to leave the place where I could get answers, and because of my pride, I was going to walk out of there without understanding. What I want everybody to understand is it doesn’t matter what your diagnosis is. If you do not understand how you got there, what’s going on, and what you need to do to actually be healed, you are wasting your time because of a lack of—watch this—ignorance. I believe that the enemy, who is the Prince of Darkness, which means he is the one that would love to keep believers in darkness or ignorance, would love for you to come in here, praise, and shout without understanding that all of us probably have something we need to understand better so that we can deal with it.
Okay, Proverbs 4:7: Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore, get wisdom. In all your getting, get understanding. Do you understand why you’re promiscuous? Not that you are; I know everybody’s focusing on you being promiscuous. But do you understand where the hole was created back here that made you always present yourself as if you needed to be with somebody? Do you understand why you’re angry, or is everything that happens to you an amalgamation of moments that now you can’t even control in your emotions? In all your getting, get understanding. Some of you don’t even understand what has plagued or distracted you for years. How do I know it? It’s all through the Bible. When we look at our main character that we’ve been studying, Samson, I came to the conclusion as I studied his whole story that he had a diagnosis that he didn’t understand.
So, he lived with it until it killed him. Hear what I just said to you: Are you living with something that can be corrected? The only reason you’re not correcting it and not going after it is that you got a diagnosis but did not do the work to be delivered from it, which leads to your death instead of its death. Okay, I know I’m walking heavy on an anniversary; do you want me to tell you the best is yet to come? It is after you deal with your distractions. Okay, all right. As I’ve been looking at Samson’s life for three weeks, I’ve tried very hard to stay out of the story of Samson and Delilah. I’ve tried to let you know that Samson made decisions before Delilah that led him to destruction. Because everybody wants to blame the thing that everyone sees blow up, but it was everything that happened before that. As I realized what Samson was dealing with, he was dealing with a disease called—watch this—the title of my sermon: The Disease of Double-Mindedness.
Oh, I’m about to cook this thing. Samson was a double-minded man, and the Bible tells us that a double-minded man is unstable in all his ways. Could the instability in your life not be because of a lack of something, but because you have too much of everything? Let me say it one more time: Could the deficiencies in your life be because you’re not lacking something? You let everything in—Jesus—and because you let what culture says in and what Christ says, because you let what they said in and what He said, you have become double-minded. So unstable! Can’t trust anything, can’t put anything on you, can’t trust yourself for anything because you’re just wobbly. In your marriage, you are wobbly because you love her and still want attention from them—double-minded. I mean, you give God something, but you’re going to make sure your house is paid for—double-minded. What are you saying? Who do you honor first?
Well, I got to take care of this. Nobody told you to get that house. Okay, let me stop. You thought you needed that house to fulfill an insecurity that made you not put God first in your resources. So now you can’t tithe; you can’t do it. But the problem is: there you go! You have different allegiances. God, in His word, the only place that He compares Himself to anybody, said you can’t serve God and mammon because you will love one and hate the other. So many believers, when it comes to their money, are double-minded. You want God to bless you, but you don’t put Him first—double-minded.
Okay, it’s too strong in here already, but I didn’t make it 10 years by patty-caking with you on the issues. I want to tell you the truth, and I want to tell it to you in a way that helps you. You cannot get married still thinking about the ex; you’re in the future and the past. You are double-minded, and you’re keeping all their teddy bears and jerseys they gave you, and you still go buy the cologne or the perfume and spray it around because it just brings you peace. What you’re doing is delaying yourself. You are double-minded. Samson suffered from the disease of double-mindedness. Your decisions before Delilah are what set you up for destruction with Delilah because Samson had taken a Nazarite vow, knew the promises of God, but still decided to play with his destiny. Did he embrace it? He said, «I’ll do it God’s way and my way.» I’m double-minded! I mean, it’s to my own convictions. This is my truth.
Oh, come on, y’all! Y’all know the things that God tells you. Some of y’all on the fast did your own fast. God told you to do something, but you did your own thing because, uh, and He’s speaking to you, but you’re double-minded. His word doesn’t matter more than your word, and when your word matters more than His word, but you still want His blessing and favor. Okay, all right, let me come back up. Samson had, watch this, a pattern. This is what I want to let you know about patterns: He was double-minded; he embraced both. I’m getting in trouble right here, but he embraced the prophetic and the psychic. He embraced laying hands on things and the crystals and the chakras. He was double-minded. He embraced the horoscope and the Holy Spirit. Do you?
Okay, so some of y’all, what are you, Pisces or Taurus, baby? You’re double-minded! Either He knows the purpose and the plan for your life, or He knows the plan. But He said in His word, «Before I formed you in your mother’s womb, I knew you.» Please don’t let AI get you out of the anointing! I need you to hear me say: Look at your neighbor and say: «Stop holding both!» You’re double-minded! Stop holding both! Choose ye this day whom you will serve! Stop holding that! You will have generational curses when we’ve been redeemed from the curse of the law, and we can walk in Freedom! Stop holding that and then thinking God is about to do something; you’re double-minded! Okay, let me stop, and if your practice is being double-minded, I need you to hear me say this: Patterns are practiced! Your patterns didn’t just happen; you practiced them. Patterns are premeditated. Anything you’re going to stop?
Stop acting like it just happened! Stop! Just don’t be a liar over stupid stuff! You knew you were going to do that! It might not have been long before you knew, but you knew! You knew you were going to accidentally send him that picture! Oops, did you see that? You knew because a pattern is practiced; a pattern is premeditated! Watch this: Patterns prophesy. If you need a prophetic word, look at your patterns. Ooh, I’m stepping heavy in here! No, no! I’m going to do something different; we’ll see! But your pattern tells us that you’re going to self-sabotage about four months in. You’re going to get the logo; you’re going to start it; you’re going to post about it twice; you’re going to have a t-shirt made, and then about four months in, when you didn’t see what you really wanted to see, you’re going to look at what somebody else is doing. You’re going to get discouraged, and you’re going to stop. For four years, this is going to be my year.
Baby, that’s what I want to say when people say that this is going to be my year! Maybe, if I could be honest! Maybe! Because if you don’t allow the Holy Spirit to interrupt your pattern, He has to come in divinely, and that’s why you cannot be afraid of new things God calls you to, right? If He’s telling you to go to a tribe, «Well, I’m not a people person,» He’s trying to interrupt the pattern of isolation. He’s trying to tell you to do something. «Well, I can’t give that much money.» He’s trying to interrupt the pattern of poverty. He’s trying to interrupt the pattern because your pattern is prophesying, and your children’s children may walk in what you won’t allow the Holy Spirit to interrupt.
Judges 16:20—I’m going to try my best to stay out of the scripture, but I had to share this one scripture with you because it scared me when I read it, and I didn’t want another week to go by without you knowing that the hand of God is on you right now, but it’s on you by grace. I don’t want you to walk out of here today and feel like you can keep doing what you used to do and still get the same thing He did last time; He’s going to do this time. I don’t know who this is for, but you’re making me a week ahead of what I want to do because of your foolishness. Watch this: In Judges 16:20, it says, «Then she cried out—this is Delilah—'Samson, the Philistines have come to capture you! '» When he woke up—watch this—he thought, «I will do as I did before, and I will shake myself free.» The most scary part of this whole scripture is that he didn’t realize the Lord had left him. I just came to tell some of y’all you’ve been playing with stuff. You’ve been in patterns and cycles and distractions, and you’ve been saying, «Man, I’ll do as I did last time. Yeah, yeah, yeah! I’ll just repent! I’ll just go to the altar! I’ll just do this! I’ll just stop! I’ll just…»
I just want to let you know, you never know! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Which time is the last time? Hear me when I say it; write it down in a point. I have a question: Will the next time be the last time because you ran out of time? Would Samson have told her anything? Because before this, he had played games over riddles. He liked playing games; he enjoyed messing with things that could kill him. It’s called pride when you play with things that have the potential to destroy you, and he liked doing this. But every other time he did it, he was able to get out so easily because God was on him. This is my question to us: Have we taken what God has given us in mercy and grace and turned it into something we feel like we deserve, which has now made us entitled to it?
Okay, will the next time be the time? Do y’all have a baby? No, I’m just asking. Yeah, it was an oopsie the first three, but will it be the next time? Will it be the next time that they find out you’re stealing money from the business? «Well, the first time my baby needed formula; and the second time, I needed an outfit for my birthday weekend.» Well, the next time you send the email to the wrong person that you’ve been gossiping about? He’s been trying to reach you with His hand of mercy and protection. The delusion is that you can have what God wants for you and still keep doing that crap! You’re double-minded! You’re suffering from a disease. And this man couldn’t decipher, as many of us can’t decipher.
Listen to what I’m about to say very closely: There is a difference between condemnation and consequence. So, it is God’s grace that will pour out, and your soul can be set free after you mess up and do anything that goes against His word. All you have to do is repent—that means to turn. And God says: I forgive you, but now you have to go to jail. Come on, the consequence is still in place even when condemnation has been eradicated. Most people think that God has left them when they are dealing with the consequences of their actions, and they then try to flip it like God has abandoned them. No, if you make your bed in hell, He said, «I’ll be right there with you,» but we’re going to be making this bed in jail 'cause that was embezzlement. You abused those kids; I forgive you, but the consequence is that you are now labeled for the rest of your life. I need to help the church understand that while you’re playing with things that can mess you up, it’s not just about going to heaven or hell; it’s also about being useful in this life.
So many people have focused only on the question, «Am I going to hell?» that they have not gotten into a place where they can actually help. You’re not helping the kingdom of God; you’re not helping what God wants to do, 'cause you’re so distracted and playing with sin. God is saying, «Would you come out from over there? Stop being double-minded. Stop playing with that.» «I only drink when I feel…» you know what I’m saying, «I only drink on the weekends.» So that means two days out of every week God gives you; you are incoherent, you make poor decisions, and you’re not there for the family you prayed for. Stop being double-minded! And y’all be like, «Oh yeah, that’s for the drug addicts and the alcoholics and all that other stuff.»
Hear me, Christians. Hear me, religious people: I just need you to understand that judging other people and not putting that mirror up to yourself while you talk—look at her, wearing that to church! This is a house of God. Their heart is pure, but their dress is short; your dress is to the floor, but your heart is tainted, and you somehow think you’re helping God. You’re double-minded, 'cause the truth is, if you were born in this day and age, you would have worn that dress too. We just don’t have Facebook posts to prove it! We know, we know, stop it! Stop acting like you’re so removed from people! Whether it was your testimony or not, too many believers have come into this thing where we’ve been extended grace, and we’ve been double-minded.
How do we let them in or do we not? Do they deserve the cross or do they not? Write this down as a point: Grace covers the condemnation; you cover the consequence. I’m just going to let you know right now, the grace of God will cover the condemnation, but you’re on the hook for the consequence. Samson has to pay for the consequence of playing with somebody who he knew was trying to distract him. He loses his power based on being in the wrong lap. That’s why Romans 6:6 says, «What shall we say then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase?» By no means should we do this. We are those—somebody say, «We are those"—we are those who have died to sin. How can we live in sin any longer? What I’m telling everybody is you may stumble, you may fall, you may make a mistake, but being double-minded is embracing, «This is how I’m going to live.»
Many people have not been honest with themselves. You have made a decision: I’m not going to wait until I’m married. You’ve embraced that you want a godly marriage, and whenever the urge is too high, you’ve embraced that, «I’ll do what God says as long as it fits in with my plan.» Maybe you didn’t understand, like I didn’t understand, when that man started talking a different language about my life. 'Cause without him breaking it down, I would have never been able to do what was necessary. Today, all I’m trying to do is break it down to where you can now make a decision: Do I need to do something different to stop embracing the parts of me that give me ease because I’m double-minded? Okay, I’m going to move because I need everybody to get this last part. Write this down: being double-minded is willfully embracing the promises of God and the pleasures of your flesh.
I’ll say it again: this is the definition: being double-minded is willfully embracing the promises of God and the pleasures of my flesh. I’m going to do both. Y’all seen that Shannon Sharpe meme where he says «both»? That’s how many believers hope this thing works: I can do both, I can think both, I can live both. Pastor Mike, why is this coming off so straight at me? 'Cause you might be double-minded! What double-mindedness leads to is instability. Okay, watch this: Samson knows his assignment and his Nazarite vow; he knows it, and he willfully keeps playing with God’s promises. Write this down: being double-minded is being one degree off from God’s design for your life. It’s just one degree. It’s just, «I know you told me that, but I’m going to step over here.» It’s just, «I know you told me not to hang out with them all, but I’m just going to hang out with one of them.»
When you make a decision that goes against God’s design, it’s a dangerous place to live. It’s time to stop playing with what has the power to kill us. Let me make something clear real quick: everybody check in with me. There’s a difference between being double-minded and duality. Hear what I just said: there’s a difference. I’m going very surgical today because I need somebody to get free. There’s a difference between being double-minded, which means I’m willfully embracing what God wants and what I want, but because we live in this fallen world, the Bible tells us we will have duality. I want to do something for God, but I also want to slap them. Do y’all hear me? Where are the real people at? Like, I want to stop eating this stuff, but it’s seasoned so well!
When you live in a fallen world, every person will have duality. But duality I can bring to God; double-mindedness means I’ve decided to live with it. Every time I face my duality, the shadow side of me, the bad side of me, the part of me that does what I don’t want to do, I’m supposed to drag that here. «Here he is again, God! We looked at something we weren’t supposed to look at, and we looked at it way too long. Help me deal with him.» The difference? Double-mindedness means, «Hey, we don’t need to tell anybody.» «No, no, no! I know we messed up again, but don’t trip! God’s forgiven us. We’re good!» Confess to who? My wife would kill me and leave me. My men’s group, my tribe? They’ll think you can judge me. No! I know you’re getting sick of your own filth.
I know you hate living like this, but the only way to keep this going is to say we know God has a huge plan for us, but just a little bit of this won’t hurt anything. That’s the difference. All of us have something in us we don’t like; that’s the fallen world. But don’t hug it; don’t embrace it; discipline it, expose it. «I did it again; my bad self did it again,» but don’t feed it, baby it, or make provision for it! One degree off is a beautiful thing because if I’m one degree off, I can step right back into place. But if I’m one degree off, well—the reason I had to give this message today is if I’m one degree off for a long time, one degree off for a long time becomes a habit. Oh, Lord! Having dual thoughts is not being double-minded; double-mindedness is the result of your decisions. Duality is the result of living in a fallen world.
Could you give me the shadow self? Turn these lights out; I just want to show everybody what this looks like. This is what most believers look like: half in the light, half in the dark. I want everybody to see me for the part of me that’s in the light, but the truth is, every time I make a decision and walk in my double-mindedness, it pulls me further and further and further away, and I see prophetically some of you just have this in the light, and you’ll worship, but there’s no part of your mind that’s been in the light for decades. So people say, «Oh, there’s Larry!» «There he goes!» «Hey, there’s Dad!» «Hey, there’s Mom!» And most of us celebrate when we get like this. «Oh man, they’re such a person of integrity!»
You only see half of me, 'cause integrity is what you do in front of people and what you do when nobody sees you. You can see my features, and you know it’s me 'cause I’m halfway in the light. But what would happen if every believer continued to contend for their faith and actually became a person of transformation? It would inch you more and more and more into the light of who God wants you to be. When the full display of you is in the light, this is what the Bible refers to as God’s glory. It’s when you can see everything He put inside of me— even if darkness is all around me, I’m still lit up! I’m still fulfilling the call of God on my life. I’m still going to show up and be everything that God has called me to be! But the enemy would love for you to settle into being double-minded just enough.
If this is how your soul looks today, if this is how your relationship with God looks today, I came to tell you, like I would have told Samson if he had anyone around him: «Will this be the last time you play with this thing that has the ability to kill you?» Keep the camera right where it’s at, 'cause when I step outside of the light, my spot never changed, right? One degree off! I’m all the way on the other side of the stage, I’m on the other side of the room, and God’s still looking for me where I’m supposed to be. Some of you, under the sound of my voice, have been so far out of God’s will. I came to tell you, though: your spot is still available! Somebody needs to rejoice right there, 'cause He didn’t change His mind about you! Yes, He didn’t change His mind about you; He’s waiting for you! Sometimes it looks like, «Here I am, it’s me! God, this is what sanctification looks like.»
It’s not all at once; it’s like, «God, I’m going to keep coming. God, I don’t feel good, and I still took a drink this week, and I still cursed my kids out, but I—no, no, no, no, no—keep coming! Keep coming! Keep coming!» Tell somebody, let somebody know what you’re struggling with and what you’re going through, and eventually, you will walk fully—oh, I feel this thing—into the light that God has called you to walk into. It’s time for God’s people to put off double-mindedness and reach destiny. Somebody give God a shout of praise in this place! Come on, turn the lights up in here! Yes, sir! Yes, sir! This is how we’re going to end: I’m going to give you three decisions that kill double-mindedness and help you last the decade.
There’s more, but I thought these three would be the best to share with you, 'cause some of you are realizing: «Man, I have walked in a level of embracing not having fear, embracing fear like it’s not just an abstract theory; you’re saying, 'No, I’m going to live with this forever! I want this; this is part of how I discover.'» And God’s like, «I didn’t give you a spirit of fear, but power, and love!» Yes, we’re going to deal with it, but don’t hug it! Three decisions: The first one, I made a decision over ten years ago to become devoted. I devoted myself. I took away my vote! How many people have an opinion when it comes to God? I can’t raise my hand no more, 'cause Samson had made a vow to be devoted but still raised his hand: Nazarite vow, «Don’t do this, don’t do this, don’t do this, don’t do this!»
And Samson did all of it! He didn’t take his vote away, even though God’s hand was on him. I’m telling somebody, what’s going to kill that thing in you that makes you double-minded is to stop voting on it. Stop voting! Stop taking—I’m going to serve God. I’m going to give what He tells me to give. I’m going to obey. He has my full yes. I am devoted! What does that mean practically? Very simply: I am surrendered. It’s been ten years of me saying, «God, dog, okay, I’ve got to walk through this.» I take my vote away.
I’ve got to love this person even though I know they’re talking about me. I know it, God, and they’re on staff! «Lord, I’ve got to do what? Pay them for four months as they exit? Lord, why? I’m surrendered!» I take my vote away. «Lord, these people are talking sideways on the internet; they don’t know me like that!» I’ve got to pray for them—go through the comments and call out their names—"Lord, I know I’ll do a lot, but praying for BigJake662 after that comment?!» But I’m devoted! If you would take your vote away, if you would say no. I am faithful in marriage, right? I will be faithful. I’ve taken my vote away. Let me give you scripture for it: Luke 22:42 says, «Father, if it is Your will.» This is Jesus saying, «Take this cup away from Me; nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done.» I am surrendered.
The second thing is this: this is a decision that kills double-mindedness for me. The first part is being devoted; the second is committing to discipline. The truth about embracing my flesh is that my flesh is easy on the front end but kills me on the back end. The hard thing about discipline is it’s hard on the front end, and it makes life easy on the back end. The Bible tells us right here in Hebrews 12:11, «No discipline is enjoyable while it’s happening; it’s painful. But afterward, there will be a peaceful harvest of right living, not for everybody, but for those who are trained in the way of discipline.» Some of y’all need to kill double-mindedness just by doing the same thing over and over again. I’m telling you, no discipline starts off as a desire, but if you just decide, then it will become a discipline, and at some point, the discipline becomes a desire.
When I started preaching and shouting about crazy faith, I was almost 300 lbs. I couldn’t imagine working out two days a week, let alone six days a week. I would eat you under the table; I had sauces everywhere. I was killing my—no, I’m not playing—I was killing my temple in the name of Jesus. When the Holy Spirit said, «I can only bless the ministry to the level that your body can handle,» I said, «It’s not fair, because there are fat preachers everywhere, Lord.» Can I be honest? This is my relationship with Him. There are big pastors everywhere, and they seem to be successful. He said, «I’m not talking about them for you. I will stop this if you don’t stop what you’re doing.» So what did I do? I committed to discipline, and it never has been fun until about this last year.
I don’t know what happened, but something switched in me. I’m trying to tell you the truth: I pay someone to come train me every single day. Many times, I think about what I could do with that money instead of paying him to put me through torture. Now, at 5:00 on a Sunday morning, my garage opens, and I’m in there lifting heavier weights than I lifted all week. On Sunday morning, for an hour and a half, I’m praying, preparing, worshiping, and laughing, and I’m like, «How did this happen?» God said, «You started!» Oh God, you missed it. Some of you will never reach where you are trying to go because you just won’t start. When I started discipline, I became disciplined.
Last thing, I got to move y’all. The last thing I realized to kill the double-minded mentality, for me to last a decade, is I realized I was defended. I realized that I’m surrounded. I think about all that God has done in my life, and I think about Samson’s life. I realize we have no other communication of people being around Samson except for Delilah, his parents, and people trying to kill him. It was his adversaries, his parents, and his distractions. If you’re going to be defended, you cannot live this life alone.
Why do we keep talking about tribes, small groups, and coming to church? Don’t just run out of here when it’s over. It’s because when nobody knows you, the enemy knows you best. Do you hear what I just said? I can tell the people the enemy knows really well because nobody else knows them, and the enemy would love for you to stay in that place. I’m saying we need to disrupt this cycle because you’re living in this idea of double-mindedness—that somehow you can be delivered and healed in isolation.
The Bible says in James that people get healed. You can be saved by Jesus, but when you get healed, you confess your sins to one another. You don’t need the prophet, the apostle, or the bishop to do that. You need to turn to somebody on your row and say, «I’ve been dealing with this, this, and this.» God says when you pray about that, that’s where healing comes. Yes, sir. But the double-minded nature would say, «I need to talk to the man of God.» I don’t have more power than what God has given to your husband, your wife, or your cousin. Do you hear what I’m saying?
I know everybody wants to be elevated; I’m just regular. I just obeyed; that’s it. And you have that same ability if you step out of double-mindedness. A woman who helped me form my prayer journey, her name was Mary. She told me at about 14 years old, «Michael,» and she looked me square in the face when I was mischievous, acting crazy, doing all kinds of stuff. She said, «Michael, because of the call of God on your life, many can, but you cannot.»
If I had a billboard for my life, I can literally see that: because of the call, many can, but you cannot. As we stand here at ten years, a decade of leading this church, I realized the only reason I made it is because there were many times that others could, and I decided to take my vote away, be disciplined, and remember that I was surrounded by people who made me say, «I’m not going to do that; I’m not going to say that; I’m not going to go there.» I took away the power of this disease to be double-minded.
Do I have duality? Do sometimes things come in my head or thoughts? Yes, but every time, the Bible tells us to take those thoughts captive. You have to grab that thought and say, «Huh, that doesn’t line up with my destiny.» No, that was a real thought, but uh-uh, I’m not going that way. I’m not coming out of the light. As I think about a decade of what God has done in this church, it’s happened because I decided. Today, I’m asking every person under the sound of my voice to decide to come out, to be delivered from the disease of double-mindedness. It’s your biggest distraction. Delilah was not Samson’s biggest distraction; it was double-mindedness.
It could have been Delilah, it could have been Dora, it could have been a DeLorean, or it could have been Donisha. Y’all know your parents give you interesting names. The thing I’ve learned about Samson’s life is it was going to happen anyway. It didn’t have to be Delilah because the pattern had already prophesied that he was going to end up telling somebody where his power was. Can you imagine God’s goodness to hide his power in something regular like hair? Your power is not in some great thing that everybody’s going to see; it’s something uniquely put there by God, something that is just normal to you. But he played with his power, and it ended up in destruction.
I wanted to say this quote as we end. As I stand here, grateful, and as I believe that we’re about to embark on another decade together, I’m going to say it one more time: as we embark on another decade together, say two things. All my OG GCC people, come home. There’s a space here for you; we need you. Your greatest days are not behind you; your greatest days are in front of you.
That’s the first thing I want to say. The second thing I want to say is, look what God did with our «yes,» because we decided. The reason I’m saying this is that today I want it to be a line drawn in the sand for every person under the sound of my voice: no more double-mindedness. I’m not embracing both; today I make a decision. Some of y’all are going to have to throw things away; some of y’all are going to have to shut the door to distractions; some of y’all are going to have to move.
I’m telling you, the next time will be the time that the consequences outweigh the convenience of what was happening. The team gave me some stats about what our «yes» has done, and today I want to encourage you that if you say «yes» today, a decade from now, you could potentially change the world. When I said «yes» to God, I had no idea what was going to come on the other side. But these are just some stats they told me: since I took over the church and started pastoring, I’ve preached over 520 Sundays. That’s nuts! They told me we have uploaded 2,232 sermons on YouTube. Now watch this; this is the one that took me out: because of those 2,232 sermons, 220 million views have happened, with 88.3 million hours watched of sermons.
Let me bring that into context for you: the average human lifespan is 6,924 hours. That means 88.3 million hours is the equivalent of 127 lifetimes! People have watched the word of God proclaimed from this place enough for 127 lifetimes. Get ready to shout with me: because of our generosity in the last 10 years—not since 26 years nor since we started the church—but what we’ve been able to find in the last 10 years of resources given away to others, y’all ready for this number? 34,514,900 dollars!
We have seen 3,238 baptisms at Transformation Church. This is the power of our «yes.» When you leave double-mindedness and you say «yes,» standing all over this building, you could see people’s lives transformed. How do we do that at Transformation Church? In the last 10 years, we have seen—get ready to shout because the vision is representing God to the lost and found for what transformation is—173,562 salvations at TR! Come on, y’all, let’s give God a shout of praise for that! Hallelujah!
Before you leave, listen to what I’m saying: this all came because we decided to stop being double-minded. Hands lifted all over this place; I want to pray for two different types of people. If you know you’re double-minded in an area of your life and you want God to begin to deliver you, I want to pray for you. Hands lifted right there.
Father, in the name of Jesus, I feel the presence of God as the worship team comes. I thank You, Father God, that right now You are allowing us to see the areas where we have been choosing You and choosing our flesh. Today, Father God, we thank You that we know we can’t disciple our flesh; we have to kill it. So, Father God, I thank You that it will never come under subjection; daily, we have to put that thing under. Today, we need Your help. Some of us have been walking with these patterns for decades, God. Today, I thank You it’s the day of deliverance. It’s the day that we’re coming into the light—not that everything changes today, but everything begins to change today. God, I’m asking You to allow us to stop living in darkness and walk fully into what You have called us to do. And, Father, for those who need to receive You, I thank You that Your spirit is right here.
If you’re watching online or in this room, there is a spirit of surrender in this room. If you want to accept Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior today, on the count of three, I want you to slip your hand up in the air. This changes everything. This is you deciding, «I’m no longer going to be double-minded. I’m not going to live for the world; I’m going to give God my life.» One: you’re making the greatest decision of your life. Two: people are praying for you, and your name is about to be written in the Lamb’s Book of Life. I see you. Three: shoot your hand up all over this building. I see you; I see you; I see you; I see you. Come on, I see you, my brother! More than I see you, God sees you.
Come on, Transformation Church! This is what we believe. The numbers are going up! Heaven is going to be populated because of our «yes,» and today, we add to that number. Everybody just say this prayer with me:
God, thank You for sending Jesus just for me. Today, I come out of darkness, I come out of double-mindedness, and I turn to You. I focus on You. I believe You lived, You died, and You rose again for every one of my sins. Change me, renew me, transform me. I’m Yours. In Jesus' name, amen.