Michael Todd - The Compromise of Pornography (How to Quit Porn)
Listen, I know you’re at home or wherever you’re watching this from. I’m so grateful that you’ve made it to the last week of our relationship series. I don’t know about you, but this whole experience has transformed and revolutionized our lives and the lives of so many others. Today, I really do have a word I want to share with you. Before I do that, the first thing I want to say is that I miss everybody. I miss seeing people; I miss hugging you all. I have missed taking pictures with you. We are praying for you, Transformation Church.
There are thousands of you who have been so faithful in the midst of this pandemic, and on behalf of myself and Natalie, once again, I just want to let you know that there is not a day that goes by when I am not thinking of you as your pastor. I am praying for you; we are fully aware of what is going on, and we speak protection over you. I want you to know that even in this time, no matter what it looks like or feels like, we have an anchor, and His name is Jesus Christ. Even if the storm keeps coming, even if you don’t know if you’re taking your kids back to school or if you have to be their teacher this year, or with all the different storms that are coming, God says, «I will be your anchor.»
Before I start anything else, someone needs to hear that word right now because you feel like you’re capsizing, and God says you’re not going to drown because I’m going to be your anchor. Someone just needs to say, «I have an anchor.» Come on, somebody say, «I have an anchor,» and His name is Jesus. As we prepare to really dive into this next half of the year, many of you are new to Transformation Church and have just started attending within the past year. I want to let you know about something we do at Transformation Church to preserve health and wholeness for our organization. When I first became the pastor of Transformation Church, my oversight pastor—many of you know him, Pastor Tim Ross—he’s going to be preaching later this year here at TC, and I cannot wait for you to hear that because it’s going to be fun! But our oversight pastor told Natalie and me, «When you become the leaders of this church, I need you to take a month off every year for sabbatical.»
I thought, «There’s no way I can take a month off.» I became the pastor in February, and he said, «Yeah, in July, you need to take a month off because you need to rest, get new revelation, and rejuvenate.» As I obeyed and submitted to this mission—yes, your pastor is submitted. This is not about us deciding whatever we think we should do. God gives human authority, and we listen to that. As we’ve been submitted to that, it has been one of the most refreshing things that has ever happened. Our sabbatical usually falls in July, but God told me I needed to finish this series.
Today, I’m about to speak a word, but from mid-August all the way to September, your pastor is going to be resting. I won’t be preaching, and you know most pastors, when they start saying these things, try to keep it a secret. I’m not going to hide it from you. Listen, you know us at Transformation Church—we are humble, open, and transparent. I won’t hide anything from you. If I go on vacation, I’m going to post a picture. Do you hear me? In fact, I’m going to be off social media for 30 to 40 days. Why? Because I need God to fill me up. If we’re going to accomplish everything God has for us in the future, I need to be sealed up. I need to spend time with my children, look into their eyes, play Legos, and not worry about a post or a text or praying for this or that.
I’ve got to be in that place because if I do, I believe the future of our church will not just be a short burst of potency; we’ll be able to sustain it for a long time. Does anybody want to do this for a long time? If we’re going to do this for a long time, we have to create boundaries. God tells us to have a sabbath weekly, and I’m going to model this for you. For everybody freaking out right now—chill out; this is how we got to this place of success. The original Relationship Goals series came out of a sabbatical. «Not Buried» was the series God gave me out of sabbatical. «Crazy Faith» is the series God gave me out of sabbatical. You’re missing it. I don’t know what God’s about to do out of this sabbatical, but I need you to be praying for your pastor.
As I rejuvenate, get revelation from God, and spend time with my family, my wife, and alone, just being able to process all God has done, I want to be able to process it all and then get fresh vision. Everybody say, «Fresh vision.» Because once I get fresh vision, watch out for where we’re going as a ministry, where we’re going as a church. I’m asking something from you: I need you to be faithful to God’s house even when the leader is not here. You all know it. Some of you have the attitude, «If Pastor Mike ain’t going to be there, then I ain’t going to be there.» I’m on sabbatical too.
The crazy thing about this is every year presents an opportunity for spiritual maturity. The Bible talks about us maturing and moving from place to place. Only a baby needs to be fed in one specific way; a baby needs a bottle, but when you become fully mature, it may not be your preference, but if it’s going to nourish you, you go towards it. I’m asking you to take the challenge to spiritually mature. I would not let anybody touch this platform who is not hearing from God, and I promise you, over the next few weeks, I have some of the world’s greatest speakers coming to share God’s word with you. I would never allow anyone to feed the flock food that is not high quality. But I’m asking you to lock in.
We’re about to start Fun Month next week, and it’s going to be themed. We have a culture code of fun at Transformation Church; we enjoy it all. We’re going to have games, giveaways, and draw people in, but I want you to be open to what God wants to do through your life while I’m not here. Most leaders wouldn’t say this to you because they want the vision to be built on them, but I want to be very clear about this: this is built on a strong vision, not just on a strong individual. Until the church is about the Kingdom and not a king, we will only see incremental growth. Transformation Church is representing a strong vision this morning. I know there are some people who God told us in January that the word for the year was «strength,» so we’re getting stronger this year.
While we’re away, I’m asking you to pray for me and Pastor Natalie. Pray that God gives us wisdom, insight, and increased passion and love, that our children feel surrounded; that as we share ourselves with the whole world, God lets there be a unique divine presence in our home. I’m just asking you—I’ve never asked for much—but right now I’m asking you, and I’m promising you one thing: that when I step back into this pulpit after today, I will be full of what God has given me for you, your family, and our future. If you agree, can you say amen?
Come on, in the chat, let me see some amens and praise hands. Let’s get ready to go into the word today! Yeah, I feel it now. I’m ready. I had to get that out of the way. I do not know how long I’m about to preach again this Sunday, but I’m about to go on sabbatical, so everyone who needs a shorter word, come back next week. But I’ve got to unload this clip right now because we are in week 10 of a series we’re calling «Relationship Goals Reloaded.» This is your last chance. Oh, you already know this has been one of the most amazing series. I really believe that the reason God has allowed this series to go viral and for people to consume this content—from the White House to people on horseback at the beach and all around the world—is that God wants us to win in relationships.
Somebody needs to say that: «God wants me to win in relationships.» Say it one more time by faith, «God wants me to win in relationships.» I know for some of you, with all the damage and the pain that relationships have caused, and all the pain you have caused in relationships, that seems like a far-off thing. But I’m telling you that if you get the right goal in your situation and begin to aim at that goal, you can reach relationship goals. The great thing is, God does not want you to do it without Him. That’s why we have gone for 10 weeks in this series.
If you go back and look at the original Relationship Goals series, there are eight messages—almost 20 hours of content—all aspects of relationships to help you win. Then we took it and God told me to make it my first book. This right here, y’all, I didn’t even get to tell y’all at Transformation Church, but this is a 12-week New York Times bestselling book. Glory to God! The reason I say «glory to God» is because, number one, God is using the foolish things to confound the wise. He’s taking someone who has never written a book before and says, «I’m going to pack it full of content that points people to Me, and I’m going to let it be successful in culture.»
I’m going to take Christ and put Him at the center of culture. There are people out there who don’t want anything to do with our Jesus but want to know how we got a New York Times bestseller. Baby, you can’t do it for us without Jesus, and we’re getting to witness and share God. We’ve done devotionals and all these things. Why? Because God is trying to get a message to His people, and it must start with people seeing us, as believers, actually model the principles of the Word of God. In this book, I am passionate because I did not have this, and it made me make a lot of mistakes and hurt a lot of people because I did not know how to aim at the goal that God wanted for my relationships. But you’ve got me today, so I want us to go deeper into this matter.
Let’s go to the Bible, because today is going to be kind of emotional for me; this is personal today. We almost got out of this series without addressing this, and Thursday morning God arrested me and gave me a burden to talk about something. I want to tell you why we have to talk about it. Look at John 8:31. Let’s go there. Jesus said to the people who believed in Him—okay, these are people who believed in Him—"You are truly My disciples if,» everybody say «if» because everybody wants to be God’s disciples, but they do not want to meet all the qualifications He requires to truly live this out. He said, «You will be My disciples if you remain faithful to My teachings.» Watch this: «And you will know the truth.» Everybody say «truth,» and «the truth will set you free.»
Everybody just shout at me one more time, «truth.» That’s a cuss word in church most of the time! We often want to give a softened version of what happened. We want to provide the PG version of the reality we’re facing. We want to give the sanitized version of, «I’m struggling; I’m going through…» But what’s the real—everybody say «truth»? I think the problem in the body of Christ right now is that we try to pacify everybody so we don’t say the real truth. We strive not to offend anyone and try to make everybody comfortable. Oh, if you say what it really is—this is where the enemy gets to win. He wins in darkness, silence, and obscurity when we don’t tell the full truth. Today, I’m coming to tell the truth. I’m not going to allow this series to end without addressing the real issues that are plaguing people right now because God says the truth will set you free.
The problem with the body of Christ is that most people do not have freedom. The issue is that they come to the altar, they get prayed for, they hear a sermon that feels good, and they feel better, but they still do not have freedom. I pray for and counsel people who listen to the message, and they pray with the pastor, saying, «Today I feel better,» but they’re still not free. The reason many people are not free is that they do not start with the first ingredient of freedom, which is truth. This is what God says: these people were like, «We’re not bound.» The same people who, if I’m talking to you right now, are listening on your couch thinking this is for somebody else.
But watch this: they said, «We are descendants of Abraham; we have never been slaves to anyone. What do you mean you will be set free?» That’s what people think right now. The religious spirit makes you believe that if you have given your life to Christ, or if you watch church, or if you give an offering, there’s no way you can be bound. But God is talking to people who have been believers but are still bound. Jesus replied, «I tell you the truth; everyone who sins is a slave to sin.»
So everyone who is dealing with their private shortcomings—it’s funny, we’re talking about relationship goals, and the word «sin» just means missing the mark. It’s like there’s a goal and you completely miss it. He said everyone who sins is a slave to sin, and then He goes on to say, «A slave is not a permanent member of the family, but a son is a part of the family forever.» He is talking about Himself now—He’s saying that if the Son sets you free, you are truly free. Yes, I realize that you’re descendants of Abraham, and you think you’re better than everyone, yet some of you are trying to kill me, trying to silence my words right now, trying to stop the transformation I want to do in your life currently.
Watch this, as it is so important, because there’s no room in your heart for my message. God began to tell me, «Michael, the freedom that people need is available; it’s standing right in front of them; it has already been paid for.» But when I come to deliver my message, some people have no room in their hearts to receive the very message that would free them. This was me for years, playing in church, singing hallelujah, and helping others, but I had a loud culture, my own opinions, and the ideas of people filling my heart. So every time God tried to pour into my heart, there was no room for His message. Before I start today, I’m asking someone right now to make room for the truth. If your heart is full of something else—I don’t know what it is for you, but for some of us, our hearts are full of culture, full of ideas, and full of pain.
God says, «I need you to release that so I can put a message in you that will actually give you freedom.» Freedom is what you truly want; freedom is what you are really looking for—freedom from the ideas, hurts, pains, and bondages. Somebody shout at me, «Freedom!» I’m telling you right now, that if you’re full of other things, it hinders you from receiving the message of Jesus. Some of us are full of lies but not the truth, full of opinions but not the truth, full of ideas but not the truth, full of traditions. Oh yes, I’m talking to some of my older, seasoned saints because you’ve lived this way for 30 years and you’re still bound because you are full of tradition but not the truth. You are full of your experiences that you now believe to be the truth because it is what you experienced, but it was based on a lie, so it’s still not the truth.
Well, Pastor Mike, what is the truth? No, no, no—maybe you should ask, «Who is the truth?» Because the truth has a name. His name is Jesus. John 14:6 tells us this is so bold, as God reveals to you Himself: Jesus told them, «I am the way"—if you need another name for me, «aka the truth,» and if you need one more, «I am the life; no one can come to the Father except through me.» Write down my first point because this is the precursor to what I really want to discuss: Jesus is the truth.
So if you read that scripture again, «And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free,» it could also read, «And you will know Jesus, and Jesus will set you free.» If that’s the truth, if I went around the room and virtually into your space and asked how many people actually know Jesus, tons of hands would go up. But then if I asked how many people are actually free, tons of hands would go down. But I know Jesus but I’m still bound; that means I must not know Him in the way that He wants me to know Him, and I have not been able to experience the true freedom that He offers. I’m going to help somebody today—write this point down: The truth requires the truth. Let me put it a little differently: The truth, Jesus, requires the truth.
My real story—that is what I want to get to: if the truth sets you free, have you ever told anybody your real story? If the truth, Jesus, can set you free, He requires you to be truthful, and that means you’ve got to tell your real story. Uh-oh, this is where people start logging off. This is where people start leaving because if someone really knew the real story, the depths of divisive and perverted thoughts, if they really knew what you thought and you typed, if they really knew—and most of us have not been real with the One who already knows. So today, I thought I would model it. I told you all this would be the most vulnerable message because I honestly don’t care what happens after this because I’ll be able to truly share.
You know how people say, «I’m living my truth»? Often, that is an excuse for people to say whatever they want and not feel remorse for whose feelings they hurt. Today, I’m actually going to model living in your truth. I have a public confession to make, and thousands of people are watching, and I’m just going to say it: I have been in an abusive relationship for over two decades. I’ve been in an abusive relationship for over two decades, and it has not been with Pastor Natalie. I’ve been with another, and today I’m naming names because this relationship almost robbed me of everything that God promised me. The person I’ve been in this abusive relationship with is pornography.
The crazy thing about it is I’m not the only one she has been visiting. There are thousands, if not millions, of people watching this right now, and you’ve been in the same abusive relationship, thinking you were the only one but being damaged from the inside out. Today, I’m coming to expose this nasty foul spirit that has been secretly walking the halls of people’s minds, thoughts, and relationships, ravaging families and generations. I’m here to put it on front street today. That thing on the inside of you that feels uncomfortable—it’s that spirit trying to bind you. But today, I am here to tell the truth about this foul spirit that has crept its way into the church, into pulpits, behind every musician, behind every camera operator, behind every children’s church worker—behind everything that has been trying to slowly steal the virtue and purity.
I feel the presence of God coming upon me today. I will stand in the full authority that God has given me as a minister of the gospel of Jesus Christ, and I’m exposing this silent killer of relationships. I’m talking to you, pornography, and the ramifications that have come to change people’s minds. Today, I’m going to expose you for everything you’ve taken me through. This is personal—this is so personal. I’m going to expose you so that others may gain light or revelation on their relationships because there are some people watching right now who think this is not for them, people who think that movie with those explicit scenes doesn’t affect them. They’re so desensitized to the destruction you’ve put them through that they allow it to perpetuate to their children. But today, by the power of the Holy Spirit, I stand and call you what you are: you’re a demonic spirit that is coming to desensitize and dehumanize God’s children. Today, I’m serving you notice that you will no longer be able to run rampant over God’s people.
I need to know who you are, but you need to, by faith, just begin to praise God. You will no longer be able to keep us bound. You will no longer be able to keep us quiet. We’re about to expose this foul spirit. I am fired up right now because this has had me trapped for two decades, doing everything God said to do but still going home and being drawn to the lust of my flesh in ways that would rob me of my purpose and future. This relationship with pornography suffocated my destiny, destroyed my marriage before it even started, and built such insecurities in me that I lost my own identity. I know you don’t hear pastors talking about it because they’re probably struggling with it, and I know it’s unusual to be so straightforward with it, but there are so many people you pastor every week, and we’ve been talking about surface issues. The real issue is this subtle, silent sludge that is beneath all their decisions, on the belly of all their beliefs—it dirties and muddies the purity that God has called us to.
How do I know, Pastor Mike? Because I lived it. I stood catering to pornography for years, and today, I’m asking the Holy Spirit to give me wisdom. I told the team before I came out here, «This is like seeing your abuser face to face.» This is that struggle that almost cost me Natalie and Isabella and MJ and Ava. Why am I emotional, Pastor Mike? Because I was trapped in it for so long. I was around people, and they saw everything I did, but they didn’t know what I was truly struggling with. I want to come out here; it may just be for one person, but there are images, ideas, videos, and thoughts in your mind as you’re just trying to move past it, continue praising God, and moving forward. My best days are ahead! But it keeps you in a place where the enemy can keep you in shame, doubt, and guilt, and have that little secret thing that you turn to when you’re stressed or looking to relieve anxiety or just feel something.
I’m here to talk about the compromise of porn—that’s the title of my message today. We almost made it out of this series, and that thing was going to have the potential to ravage people’s lives for another two years until we did this series again. But no, I’m standing in the authority that God has given me. God woke me up at 5:30 on Thursday morning, and He said, «If you don’t fight pornography, people will die.» So today, I’m standing here. It’s emotional because I’m putting myself out there in a real, full way, but if my truth will set somebody free, it’s all worth it.
Father, I ask you right now; I need to pray right now. I’m asking you that You would penetrate the hearts of people. You would fill my mouth, Father God. I’m doing exactly what You asked me to do. I thank You because, by the power of the Holy Spirit, people are coming out of darkness and into Your light in the name of Jesus. Marriages will be saved from this message right now. People who are single and have been steeped in this—freedom is coming to them right now. God, I thank You right now for Your evident presence and the wisdom You’ve given us in Jesus' name. Amen. Somebody say, «Amen.»
So let me give you some truth because a lot of people might think, «That’s not my issue; I clicked on the wrong live stream today.» But I promise you, pornography is either affecting you and you don’t know it or it’s affecting the people you love, and you don’t know it. What percentage of Christian men and women do you think view porn monthly? This statistic might shock you. These aren’t just unbelievers; these aren’t people who are simply in the world, who don’t care. People in the world might think, «Some of those scenes are no big deal,» but I’m talking about Christians—people who show up, give, and serve.
How many do you think, according to a study done a year ago, admit to viewing porn every month? A staggering 64% of all Christian men and 15% of all Christian women admit to viewing porn monthly. Let’s dig even deeper; men are generally more vulnerable in this area, but the sad truth is, every day it’s increasingly becoming more prevalent and vulnerable for women, and they usually enter it for different reasons. Typically, it starts with comparison, insecurity, and curiosity. They want to find out how they can do something better to please their man or how they can learn to do something. Often, it begins as something educational, and they don’t understand how quickly they can become trapped in that same entanglement with the idea of pornography. Nearly 40 million Americans view porn monthly—40 million!
If you’re between the ages of 18 and 30, raise your hand at home. Okay, people in the room aged 18 to 30. The statistic rises to 79% of men between 18 and 30 watching porn every month. Out of every 10 men, seven are watching porn consistently. Now, you’re going to tell me that the way you treat people is not affected by what you’re viewing? You’re going to tell me that the way you look at people and process what they’re doing is not affected by this? Check this out: this one tripped me out. The Barna Group conducted research and found that 56% of young people believe that not recycling is immoral. So, if you don’t recycle, your morals are messed up. But out of that same group, only 32% believe pornography is immoral. So, it’s more morally acceptable to put a plastic bottle in a recycling bin than to view two people having all types of sexual encounters. That’s the world we live in.
Where did porn come from? It can be traced back, and I’m doing this for all the science nerds, for people asking where porn originated. Porn can be traced back to 80 AD when in the ruins of Pompeii, they discovered the first erotic paintings and depictions of various sexual acts designed to cause sexual arousal. This proves that porn was present even in biblical times. Well, what does the Bible say about porn? The word «pornography,» as constructed in the English language, is not in the Bible. However, the two root words are «pornea» and «graphi.»
The Greek word «pornea,» however, appears numerous times in the New Testament, and I want you to write down this word because it’s where we get the word «prostitute.» It’s also where we derive the terms «pornographic» and «pornography.» «Pornea» means prostitution, whoredom, fornication, adultery, or sexual immorality; it’s like a catch-all term when used in the Bible for anything perverse or wicked. The word «wicked» simply means things that are turned; it’s something you might recognize as wicked furniture, which is all tied and twisted. That’s the enemy’s intention: to take something that was straight and twist it—to take something that was the right way and make it wrong. That’s what perversion looks like, and that’s what the enemy aimed to do in the Garden of Eden when he said, «Is that what God said?» All he was trying to do was to pervert, twist, distort, or make things wicked. And I’m telling you that it’s so subtle, but it’s so deadly.
The Bible discusses this word «pornea,» which is where we get prostitution, and it comes to visit some of the greatest men and women of God in the Bible—people like David and Solomon. Today, I want to talk about one that I believe we can draw some conclusions from: Samson. Do you remember Samson? Samson, who was incredibly strong, was a judge in Israel. He had long hair and never cut it because he took a Nazarite vow stating he was devoted to God and would avoid strong drinks and dead animals, among other things, to keep his life devoted to God—much like many believers do when they start off strong. However, what ended up happening was that Samson had issues with pornea, or pornography of his day, or the lust of his flesh.
Look at Judges 16:1: one day, Samson went to the Philistine town of Gaza and spent the night with a prostitute. The word spread that Samson was there, so the men of Gaza gathered together and waited all night at the town’s gate. They kept quiet during the night, saying to themselves, «When the light of morning comes, we will kill him.» But Samson stayed in bed only until midnight. He woke up and thought, «Oh snap! I need to get out of here.» Then he got up, took hold of the doors of the town gate, because they usually locked them at night so that no one could get in or out. He didn’t have the key, so he lifted the gates, including the two posts—this was how strong he was—he lifted them up by the bar and put them on his shoulders, carrying them all the way to the top of the hill across from Hebron.
Let me help you understand what’s happening: this is a man who possesses strength and success beyond measure, but he still has an Achilles' heel of sexual perversion. Can I help you? It doesn’t matter how much money you make. It doesn’t matter how many followers you have. It doesn’t matter how many zeros are in your bank account. It doesn’t matter who calls you boss or boss lady; if you have an Achilles' heel that the enemy can exploit, he will use it every time to draw you back. What he’s trying to do right now is to allow you to walk in the full power and strength that God gave you while still dabbling in the things that draw you back. I know you’re judging him right now, but if we peek inside your life, how many things are we pretending that God is doing?
We seem strong in this area, but there is some Achilles' heel—some perversion—that the enemy keeps pulling on because we’re doing it in secret. He didn’t get up in the middle of the day; it says he laid with that thing in private, and people found out about it. He woke up in the middle of the night and tried to sneak out of the bed he had paid to be in. I don’t know who I’m talking to right now, but many of us are trying to sneak out of the bed that we’ve paid—something we’ve given up to be in—and it all started with the thoughts, the mind, the ideas, the perversion, and the pornography. I know this is hard to hear; some of you are asking, «Is this supposed to be discussed in church?» If it isn’t talked about here, we deal with the consequences here. We try to put you back together after the enemy has robbed all your pieces. This is what happens to Samson: sexual sin is deceptive; it never looks like what it really is.
Can I be clear with you? Every time you’re ready to do anything sexually, it always over-promises and under-delivers. It always promises, «Oh, it’s just one night, it’s just a little bit, it’s just a little porn, it’s just a little idea, it’s just a little taste,» and it always makes you feel better. It always takes us to the climax; it always makes us feel like who we’re supposed to be for that moment. «You only live once; I’m just going to do my thing, I’m going to live my life.» What it ultimately does is take what is valuable from you and leave you to your own devices. I studied the ancient Eskimos and how they would catch wolves.
The ancient Eskimos would take fresh blood and put it on a post, then freeze it. They would apply another layer of blood and freeze it again. They repeated this process, and in the end, they’d apply a fresh coat of blood and stick it in the ground. They would wait because the wolf had a keen sense of smell and would be drawn to the fresh blood on the post. When no one was watching, the wolf would lick it and keep licking it until, unbeknownst to him, he had already cut himself and was licking his own blood. His lust for the blood would ultimately lead to his demise.
The Eskimo would return the next morning to find a dead wolf next to the post, killed by its own cravings. And that picture resembles so many of our lives that rob us of our relationship goals: we follow what we feel, licking this thing until it cuts us, unaware that we’re harming ourselves. The Bible states that sexual immorality is the only sin we commit against ourselves, not anybody else. I’m preaching here, and you might think it’s something that only you feel and it doesn’t harm anybody. Yes, it does. It harms the most important person—yourself. Let me give you a point: pornography gradually allows you to kill yourself. That’s all it does.
«Well, I just want to see it one more time, this is the last time I’m going to do this, the last time I watch this movie.» No, I’ll skip over the parts, it’s not a big deal. And all it does is let your lust lead to your destruction. How do I know, Pastor Mike? Because this was my life for years. I was robbing myself of the destiny God had placed on my life by pursuing my desires. That’s why James 1:14 states, «Temptation comes from our own desires.» Look this up in the Bible: James 1:14, «Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away.» It’s not anybody else’s fault that I’m attracted to those things; they’re somewhere in me.
Let me help you. I don’t like fish, and I know some of you think that’s sacrilegious. You want catfish or salmon? No, I dislike seafood. So if someone brings in seafood, my desire for it is non-existent. Depending on how strong the smell is, I’m sometimes disgusted by it. But if you bring in some Chinese food—orange chicken, Kung Pao chicken, General Tso’s chicken, honey chicken—I can be enticed because I have a seed of desire for it inside me. Many people try to blame their situations, and I understand there are circumstances where we are exposed to things too early; we are sinful beings.
There’s already a seed of desire inside of us, so I can only be drawn away by what’s already in me. This is what they didn’t teach me in youth group; this is what they didn’t tell me at church; this is what they never taught me as an adult. I’ve been in church all my life and have never heard a message on pornography—not once—yet it was the primary thing draining the life God promised me. So what happened to Samson? How did he get to this point, a strong man now being led away by his flesh? It’s because I discovered something crucial: you cannot just read a story in the Bible; you need the context of the entire chapter to understand it.
I went back to Judges 14 and found that Samson was ready to marry and had found a beautiful woman. He married her, and during the week-long wedding feast, his wife betrayed his trust. She revealed a secret he had shared with her to her friends, making him feel awful. He was so hurt that he didn’t even spend the night with her; he returned to live with his parents. Following that pain, he returned to what was comfortable, and just a few days later, his wife married the best man from the wedding. She decided, «Never mind, I’ll go with Jerome,» because he had killed. This caused him to feel the void, which led to him seeking comfort in the bed of prostitutes. There’s always a root; there’s always a reason.
Perhaps you don’t know what it is; maybe you haven’t taken the time to discover it, but there is always a reason why you turn to images, videos, and ideas to fill the emptiness you feel. Let me put it this way: pornography is always rooted in unhealed pain. Every time you become addicted or watch pornography, you’re trying to fill a void that cannot be satisfied by that deceptive thing. That’s why you have to keep going back. It’s like when you’re thirsty and you get a quarter cup, a little shot glass of lemonade.
Number one, lemonade makes you thirsty anyway! So, you drink some lemonade, but you want more. I don’t know if I’m the only one, but I can drink a gallon of lemonade and still be thirsty. It’s like that; you keep going to it, but what you really need is water—maybe living water. I came to encourage someone who’s been steeped in these thoughts, images, ideas, and lifestyles, and now it’s played out in action. We need to go back to the root, baby. By the power of the Holy Spirit, we are going to find the thing that allowed you to be hurt—the thing that violated you, the thing that left you with a void—and we’re going to put Jesus in that void today. We’re going to believe that God will fill you up. But you won’t ask God to fill you up if you don’t think you’re empty. You won’t ask God to heal something that you haven’t revealed, and that’s why we have to walk in truth.
That’s why some of you, for the first time today, are going to admit you struggle with this. Some of you, for the first time today, are going to admit why you’ve been distant from your wife or your husband. Come on, I’m talking about real stuff right now. Your wife is sitting in the room and can please you, but you’re in the bathroom masturbating because of the pain of rejection. You used to be rejected, and so that one time when she was on her cycle and said she didn’t want to have anything, or when she was having a bad day, something was going on. I’ve got to talk about real stuff right now because I counsel these people. What ends up happening is that now you find more comfort going and sneaking away with pornography when you could have the real thing in the room. But because there’s an unhealed pain there, some of you convince yourselves—I convinced myself—that it’s better to watch pornography, masturbate, and do all these things because you’re really not hurting anybody else. But you’re hurting the one person who will be connected to anybody else: yourself. Pornography is the only thing that could rob me and make me compare my wife to people neither of us even knows.
Now, I’m comparing her to things that aren’t real, that are edited, done in multiple takes, and so many different things. Oh, I’m about to be real in here today! People who are augmented, blown up, plastic-filled, and augmented, and I allow these images to enter my mind and heart. Now, I am comparing the best thing that ever happened to me to something that never actually happened. Boy, oh boy, this is the lie of pornography! But I want to empathize with you. If you’ve ever been stuck in pornography, there is some unhealed pain there that it’s rooted in.
Let me be honest with you; my first introduction to pornography was before I was five years old. We were in a hotel, traveling on the road, doing ministry with my parents, and what ended up happening was that the movie channels turned from «Flubber» and «Space Jam» to «Freaky Kong.» Let me stop; I can’t explain what happened, but I saw something that made me feel something I’d never felt before. I didn’t have the ability at that moment—I knew it was wrong, but it felt so right. I didn’t have anybody to tell the truth to, or I didn’t feel like I had anybody to tell the truth to. From that moment, at five years old—y’all, my daughter is six right now, she’s about to be seven.
I want you to think about how young five years old is. I want you to consider how many things are now shaped by this. When I walked up to a lady, you can ask my parents, from a young age, I always had a fascination with breasts. My mama said yes, you did! I would walk up to ladies and gentlemen, «Oh, sweet person Michael,» not Pastor Michael at the time—"Oh, sweet Michael.» They would hug me, and I would find my hand down in their shirt, trying to feel something. Those images made me curious about something that I had to explore, and from the age of five years old, I started this war with the images in my head.
and some of us right now are 30 years old, 40 years old, 18 years old, 55 years old, 60, and we’re still wearing an image that we saw in our heads, and then it progressed as we got older. The only time I’m going to tell it all is in middle school. We used to go to Barnes and Noble to look at books because we didn’t have the internet. The internet was just coming up, and you had to have real money to access it back then. So we would go to Barnes and Noble, and I was just so curious and mischievous. I saw that there was a section of magazines that had plastic on them, and I was like, «What is this? Why is this here?» I pulled one down, and it was Playboy and Hustler. When you open yourself to that type of thing, everything else comes with it, so immediately my mind said I had to see this. I wanted more images; I wasn’t satisfied, there wasn’t enough. I wanted to see everything.
What I did was take an ESPN magazine—back then, an ESPN magazine was a huge magazine, I’m telling all the secrets—and I would take that magazine, put the pornography magazine in the middle of it, and go to the children’s area of Barnes and Noble on Yale. I’m exposing you today, you devil. I can’t even. I would spend hours looking at women, looking at men, looking at all kinds of things, and it progressed to when I was in middle school in the locker room. Boys would start bringing pictures they found in their dad’s stash and all this stuff, and it became a cesspool of images, thoughts, and ideas. Little girls would come and flash us in the locker room; they would run by during P.E. and flash us. It wasn’t just on paper anymore; it was in real life. Now I got to see real breasts, that color, that size, and all this other stuff.
While I was supposed to be doing math, while I was supposed to be doing English, while I was supposed to be figuring out my identity in Christ, I became obsessed with these images, these thoughts, these ideas, and the varieties. I would see people in clothes, and I wouldn’t even see them in clothes; I would be trying to figure out what was under those clothes. What type of bra did they have on? Did they have a thong or boy shorts on? All of these images were silent all the time, this was all happening in the background. Not one word was spoken out of my mouth, but everything was running in my head because it was actually in my heart.
«What do you need prayer for?» Michael doesn’t need prayer for school. Every youth camp, every church event, I just wanted to pray that I stayed focused. I was not telling the truth. The truth would be, «What do you need prayer for?» I have the images and a sexual addiction and things that I keep going back to while trying to stop, but I don’t have anybody to tell. The enemy kept me in a lie of secrets, and he kept me in a lie that was spiraling down and slowly seeping me of purpose. It was taking away my desire to progress. I didn’t want to do anything, even the things I was good at; I wanted to do only what satisfied my flesh at the moment. This went on for years until we got dial-up AOL internet, and I was doing music. I remember my dad coming in and saying, «Mike, do you need the internet for your music stuff?» I said, «Yes sir, I definitely need the internet for my music stuff.» But one of my friends told me that on the internet you could find pictures, and not just pictures; they took it up a level. You could find videos of people producing. Before, I had to imagine everything, but now I could see it for real.
I remember setting alarms to wake up at two o’clock in the morning. See, y’all don’t even know what those noises are, but if you had AOL dial-up, that mug told on you. «You’ve got mail!» That thing was loud. I would dial up and just type in whatever was on my mind, and there would be images that came up. «For $6.99, you can see the full-length video, and for $2.99, you can…» I can’t tell you how many times I subscribed and unsubscribed. To be honest, I took the free one-day trial. I remember two times I took my dad’s card to try… See, when you start down this path, the flesh is never satisfied. It wants to keep going.
1 Thessalonians 4:3 tells us that God’s will is for me to be holy and stay away from all sexual sin. Better said than done; that’s hard. Then it progresses. You get cell phones, and I loved the iPhone, but it was the worst thing that ever happened to my sexuality. I loved the access it gave me to different things, but that access started to kill my destiny because I could be in the backseat of the car with Fred Hammond playing «Blessed» on the radio, and I could be back there with the sound off on my phone, looking up pornography. Every parent who’s shocked right now, calm down; that phone you gave your kid when they were nine meant they’ve seen pornography. Let me help burst this bubble in church. We will live in the truth.
What ends up happening from there is it becomes habitual. I have it everywhere that I go. I don’t even have to really hide it; it’s pouring into my pocket, no accountability, nobody to share it with. I only get with friends who do the same thing, so now I have accountability in the wrong thing. I have community in the wrong thing. What ends up happening is it leads you down a path that robs you. I came to a point where I had to realize that the video would never fill the void. The visual would never fill the void. I was insecure as a young man; as talented as I was, I was a lot more chubby back then, and people used to make fun of me sometimes. I never really talked about it; people used to make fun of my nose and how big it was and all this different stuff. I would have insecurities about certain things that made me think I would not approach a young lady. I wouldn’t go towards them; I would satisfy myself, and that pushed me. That was the pain that pushed me to pornography.
And you think you’re talking about your kids, saying little things about them, saying, «Oh, that’s just a joke.» What are you pushing them to? You think they’re fine, saying, «This is just how our family talks»? What are you pushing them to? You may never know; you may be dead before they ever tell anybody what they’ve been doing to try to fill the void of the lies and the hurt that you spoke into them in the name of a joke. What ended up happening was that the people around me and my not having my identity formed in Christ—because I was so young when those images came in—pushed me to pornography, which had a hold on me for years. The same way this strongman Samson was bound, it only takes a bound person meeting the right opportunity to meet their demise.
Let me say it again: a bound person with the right opportunity will meet their demise. Look at Judges 16:4. Some time later—we don’t know how long—Samson fell in love with a woman named Delilah. Now this is already after porneia, or pornography, or sexual immorality had already gotten to his heart. Then the opportunity met his damaged heart, and her name was Delilah. She lived in the Valley of Sorek. The rulers of the Philistines went to her and said, «Entice Samson. We know he has an issue; we know there’s something secret. We’ve seen him with the prostitutes; we know there’s something drawing him away. There’s something in him. Entice him, and tell us what makes him so strong and how we can overpower him and tie him up securely. Each of us will give you a hundred pieces of silver.» I did the math. There were five people who said this; it was 5,500 pieces of silver. When you do the calculation, it would have been the average of over 31 years' worth of yearly wages they were about to pay her to entice him.
So Delilah said to Samson, «Please tell me what makes you so strong and what it would take to tie you up securely.» If any woman ever approaches me, sweet-talking me, leave her alone. This goes on three more times, and Samson was so comfortable in his delusion that he didn’t even realize he was compromised. I call this message «The Compromise of Pornography» because that word «compromise» is interesting. The first part of it is «comp,» which means «free.» If I go somewhere and they say, «I’m giving you something complimentary,» this is comp: here’s a drink or here’s a room we’re comping for you.
What happens with pornography is it makes you think it’s free, that it’s not hurting anybody, that it’s something innocent. This is a comp visual. I’m not really doing anything to anybody. This isn’t really doing anything. It’s comp. But the last part of that word is «promise,» and what you’re doing is giving away for free the promise that God has for you. You are compromised; you are in a place that you don’t even realize that you are handing over your destiny, that you are willingly giving up your children, that you are standing and handing over the freedom that Christ gives you. The comp is actually giving away your promise.
You can become so twisted in sexual perversion and thoughts and images that you haven’t even watched in a long time, but you never dealt with the root of what you were dealing with, so it’s just sitting there underneath. There are people that are married right now, and you can’t figure out why your sexual life is not going to another level. It’s because it’s not just you and him laying in that bed; there are so many people weighing down that bed. That’s why some of you can’t figure out why you can never commit.
Right now, studies show that many men have erectile dysfunction and cannot perform or be attracted to a woman because they spent years with pornography, pleasing themselves. They are more attracted to the idea of a woman than an actual one. And this is how stupid the enemy is: this is coming against the actual creation process of humanity. If the devil can keep men away from their God-given reproductive relationships, he cuts off a generation from being born because they will not be intimate with a woman. These are the lies. You can get so stuck in this stuff that it’s more pleasing to please yourself than to sacrifice for another.
Samson gets so deep into this thing that he’s just toying with Delilah. The truth comes out in the midst of deception. Remember I talked about the truth? Be careful when you get so comfortable in deception that you then feel comfortable to tell the truth. He’s laying in the lap of his assassin. Get that picture: he’s laying in the lap of porneia; he’s laying in the lap of his downfall and ends up telling her, «Yeah, my secret is if you cut my hair, all my strength goes.» She rocks him to sleep the same way that pornography has walked our generation to sleep. It’s not a big deal, but it is eroding all your relationships. You can’t even hire a woman in your company without thinking impure thoughts about her. It’s all just rocked us to sleep.
Now, it’s so normal; it’s just something we have to live with. «This is just being a man. This is just being a woman; this is what we have to live with,» and it’s rocked us to sleep. The Philistines came in. Look what they did; they cut off his hair, and then they gouged out his eyes. They went to the place of vision. That’s why pornography is so deadly; it goes through the gates and takes over all of this through the eyes. That’s why I have to give you this point: what pornography leads to is more dangerous than pornography itself.
Let me just go ahead and tell you: what pornography leads to is perversion. What people don’t understand is that pornography is the gateway to living a perverted life, a twisted life. I’m going to explain it to you because many of you don’t see the connection. The Bible tells us in Proverbs 14:12 that there is a path before each person that seems right, but it ends in death. What I discovered on my journey, and I hope this truth brings you life today, is that I wish somebody had told me this earlier. I wasted 20 years. I could have been helping people; I could have been perfecting my gift; I could have been working on what God called me to do. Instead, I spent 20 years in a cycle that seemed right to me—a cycle of messing up, coming back, and doing all sorts of other things—that ultimately led me to a life of perversion, from which I didn’t know if I could return without the grace of God.
Perversion does not begin with outright perversion; this is why pornography is so devastating. What pornography provides you with is a pre-vision. When I look at pornography, I receive a pre-vision of something God wants for me, but outside the context He designed it for. So when I see that image, that magazine, or that video, it gives me a glimpse of what I’m supposed to have but in the wrong context. This is why you must stop pornography at the first sight of it. If you see «nudity» or «TV-MA,» those labels used to make me want to watch. I wasted time on dumb movies just because I saw those ratings. What I wanted was a pre-vision, a distorted vision shaped by culture, influenced by others who were hurt.
When you walk through a pre-vision, you no longer have the vision God has for you; I walked through a pre-vision and would watch pornography every night when I came home. What happens when you walk through the door of pre-vision is that you give the enemy permission. The enemy can’t come in unless you let him. Many of us have given the enemy that permission. So when I see pornography, the first thing I do is walk through the door of that pre-vision. «Oh, this is how women and men are supposed to act. This is how we’re supposed to connect. This is how I’m supposed to talk to a woman. This is the lingerie she’s supposed to wear. This is how their bodies are supposed to look.» I receive a pre-vision—not God-ordained, but one from a pervert.
When I walk through that door, I give the enemy permission to plant any image he wants in my mind, normalizing what God says is bad and evil, so I start wanting it. The greatest thing God gave you is choice. When you face attacks from the enemy, you still have a choice; you don’t have to be overtaken. This is why He says in the Word, «I place before you life and death,» and then gives you the answer: choose life. Don’t give sin permission to enter because if the enemy gains permission—not from anyone else but from you—that pre-vision turns into permission.
I walk through the door, and no matter what anyone else says, those little thoughts from what I saw at five, twelve, or eighteen, which tried to follow me into marriage, begin to take hold. This is dangerous; you start making provision for the enemy. Let me define this. You receive a pre-vision; that’s something you didn’t mean to see, something someone exposed you to, like an uncle or a cousin. You can’t narrow that down to specific people; it just happened to you—this pre-vision.
After the pre-vision, you get a choice to make. Most people act like permission wasn’t their choice, but this is your choice. «Permission» means you give consent or authorization. I was too young to understand it; I had no one to talk to. Those pre-visions—seen on the movie channel or in Playboy magazines—made me feel like I had to give them permission, like I was missing out, like I didn’t know enough to be in a relationship. The enemy does this to you: «How are you going to be with just one person? You need to know more.» This is how he traps many women; you don’t want to be someone who doesn’t know how to impress and perform.
When we give the enemy permission, we begin to provide for our desires. The word «provision,» means the providing or supplying of something. This part was the most dangerous for me; when I started making provision, I was catering to it. I’d skip things I enjoyed to make time for pornography. I spent money I didn’t have to ensure my «baby» was provided for. I hid and bought apps, doing everything to ensure that the images I granted permission had enough time—excuse me, I was devoted to pornography. I surrendered my will and said, «Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it for you.» I chased girls; I jumped in and out of people’s windows. I made provision for lust.
Romans 13:14 says, «But clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires and lust.» For over two decades, I knew nothing but how to make provision for my sin. I would know I needed to wake up in the morning for school or had a big presentation, but it didn’t matter. Many nights, I got no sleep because the flesh is never satisfied. I’d impose time limits: «Only 30 minutes.» But then three hours would pass, or I’d say, «Only two hours,» but then five hours would be lost. It was draining my life, planting images I didn’t want, robbing me of what I did want.
Many of you are experiencing this now; it feels innocent. You’re walking through a pre-vision—an image, an Instagram post. Instagram can be pornography for you too. The Bible tells us if you look upon someone lustfully, you’ve already committed adultery in your heart. As a person thinks in his heart, that’s who he is. You don’t have to touch someone to fantasize or judge them; this applies to both men and women. What you’re receiving is pre-visions, and there are people you need to unfollow today.
There are people whose posts are always an image of their body, igniting your desires and giving you pre-visions of what you want. I’m getting personal here because you might think, «I can handle this.» But you are a grown person still broken inside; your sin is controlling your life, and perversion is leading you astray. You might think you’re managing it well now, but wait until it impacts your children.
My father, Tommy Todd, aka the Captain, the man of God, faced this same issue, though his pre-vision was different. He tells me of a time walking in New York with a pocket full of quarters while with the Grambling State marching band. He took those quarters out and paid to see peep shows. It wasn’t magazines or being with prostitutes; he would insert a quarter, and a curtain would open, revealing a nude woman. Those pre-visions he stayed up all night watching gave the enemy permission. He didn’t know that he would have five sons. The Old Testament teaches that the sins of the father can pass to the third and fourth generation.
He didn’t stand up and change it. He tried to keep it hidden. He was still a good person, but he didn’t discuss the hurt he experienced. Unbeknownst to him, all five of his sons dealt with pornography; two of them even had children out of wedlock. Growing up in a Christian home, with prayer and fasting, everything good—if you don’t shut these pre-visions off and give them permission to not only ravage your life but also go to your children, it’s dangerous. It’s ironic; my father’s desire to ensure we had enough internet access inadvertently enabled my lust. He didn’t know this, but that unchecked aspect—that we never talked about—gave me a tool to indulge in sin.
This is incredibly dangerous; when you make provision for your lust, you open the door to perversion. This door has consequences that some people struggle for a lifetime to come back from. The definition of perversion is to lead astray morally, to turn away from the right path. I know some of you feel overwhelmed, saying, «This is too much; I can’t handle it.» That’s okay; click it off if you need to. But understand this: there’s someone whose life may change because of this message.
When you open the door to perversion, it leads you into open spaces with no limits. This is how it begins; you start watching men and women engaging in sexual acts, and it’s never enough. The bar keeps getting higher, and soon you’re viewing all kinds of perverse acts. You end up watching bestiality, men with animals, people engaging in degrading acts. When you open the door to perversion, everything becomes fair game. That’s why I said pornography is the gateway drug to perversion. Once you enter that space, you will steal, lie, and manipulate; you’ll do whatever it takes.
It all originated with a little pre-vision that you then gave permission to, leading to the making of provision, eventually diving deeply into perversion. This is how some people become predators—how someone can father a child and then molest them. How is it that a man can see his baby girl, born with his DNA, and then, as she grows older, begin to abuse her? You don’t start at that point; it begins with simple pre-visions that escalate into full-blown perversion.
Let me share this with you from the Bible; it describes the most dangerous place to be. I’m speaking to you because I want to tell you the truth. If I don’t tell you the truth, you won’t seek it, and the truth is the only thing that can set you free. Look at Romans 1:24: «So God abandoned them to do whatever shameful things their hearts desired. As a result, they did vile and degrading things with each other’s bodies.» They traded the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served things God created instead of the Creator Himself. The writer of this in 2020 is speaking truth on platforms like Instagram and Twitter today.
They traded it in and worshiped and served created things instead of the Creator, who is worthy of eternal praise. That is why God abandoned them to their shameful desires. Even women turned against their natural relations, indulging in sexual acts with one another. Men burned with lust for each other, committing shameful acts and suffering within themselves the consequences of their sin. They thought it foolish to acknowledge God; they viewed God’s way as outdated and irrelevant. The fight within you reflects God’s truth, which seeks to penetrate and transform your life.
Heart, but I need to ask you: is your heart open enough to receive the message right now? That’s why I read that in the beginning, it says, since they thought it was foolish to acknowledge God, He abandoned them to their foolish thinking and let them do things that should never be done. Perversion filled their lives. Look at the result: their lives became full of every kind of wickedness—twisted, turned, perverse, sin, greed, hate, envy, murder, quarreling, deception, malice, and gossip. Is that the world we live in today? They are backstabbers, haters of God, insolent, proud, boastful. They invent new ways of sinning and disobey their parents. They refuse to understand—oh gosh, they refuse to understand! They break their promises, are heartless, and have no mercy. They know God’s justice requires that those who do these things deserve to die; yet they do them anyway. Worse yet, the worst part about it is they don’t just do it to themselves; they encourage others to do it with them.
I have to expose this because pornography is not an innocent picture or video; it is the gateway to perversion, which is the point. What God says is: if you really want it that badly, go ahead. It’s like the prodigal son saying, «I want my money now! I want my inheritance now!» And the dad is trying to talk sense into him, saying, «Listen, man, just stay here.» He’s like, «But if you really want to go down this road of perversion, here it is.» Where does that end up? The prodigal son eating slop with pigs when he was born to be royalty. I don’t know who you are, but what’s happening to many of us is that when we go down this road of perversion, we give the enemy permission, and then we begin to provide for it, ultimately ending up in perversion. It leaves us eating in a place we never thought we would be.
But I have good news for you! Through Jesus Christ, something else can happen today. I believe it’s going to be a turning day for so many people. What happens when you let God into your life and invite truth into your life? We can use the same steps. Follow me right now. If we can get a vision of who God called us to be, if we can get in the Word and find out that God says we’re His masterpiece, then even though I’m steeped in pornography and all this stuff right now, God says that I’m the head and not the tail, that I’m above and not beneath. I see myself free from lust and pornography, able to sleep without going to that website. I see myself having a vision of wholeness, walking in victory as a man of valor, as a woman of virtue—a prosperous person who is able to bless others.
I’ve got a vision—that’s what God wants to give you today, a new vision of yourself. A vision of who He called you to be before you were formed in your mother’s womb. He is saying, «I need you to read your Word because I have a vision of you.» And this is what you need to understand: Proverbs 29:18 states, «Where there is no vision, the people perish,» or another translation says, «They cast off restraint; they stop caring.» But blessed is the one who heeds the wisdom of God’s instructions. How does a young man or young woman like me, who was so steeped in perversion that I lied and got myself into situations where I had car insurance fraud on my record and was doing all kinds of things, overcome? Do you all know where that came from? That came from the seed of pornography, from those visions that led me down the path of perversion. It’s like when you get off on one highway exit and end up way over there; it’s no longer a straight line. This path takes you to all kinds of places you never thought you’d go.
I’m thinking thoughts I never would have thought before—thoughts I used to judge other people for thinking. I found myself having those thoughts daily. Why? Because the vision took me to perversion. But if I can get a new vision of who God wants me to be, I can see myself pure. Some of you ladies need to see yourselves not having sex with any other guy until you’re married. You need to see yourself as too valuable to waste your treasure on pigs. Why would I cast my pearls to pigs? Some of you guys need to picture yourselves saying, «Yeah, I could go and hook up with them, but what I carry is the seed of generations. I will not waste my seed!»
I will not waste my seed on something pleasurable for me that does not fulfill what God called it to do, which is reproduce. Many of us are masturbating and wasting our seed. I know it’s graphic, but it’s the truth, and God is saying today, «I want to give you a new vision.» When I give you a new vision, guess what? You give me permission. When you start to see what God sees about you, you give God permission to guide you and lead you into all truth. That’s why we need the Holy Spirit, because He said He would pray on our behalf for the things we don’t know how to pray. He will lead us into the truth that we don’t know how to get to ourselves. He doesn’t want us to go out here and figure it out alone. He says, «I will be the paraclete, the one who walks alongside you and helps you.»
But He’s a gentleman; He’s not going to knock down your door. You have to give Him permission. That’s why the Bible says in Matthew 18:18, «Do you know what type of power you have? Truly, I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.» Do you know you can give permission to God? Then you get permission from God to loose and bind things. Some of your prayer lives need to become more aggressive; you’re too soft with your prayers. I remember when I was battling through this and had already given the enemy permission to show me whatever images and do all these other things. When I got filled with the Holy Spirit, I started loosing and binding things. I said, «In the name of Jesus, I command the images in my mind to bow to the Word of God in my life. I take every vain imagination captive by the power of the Holy Spirit. I am attracted to that, but I will not give in to my desires. I bind every lie of the enemy of insecurity inside me that makes me feel I need to go to this instead of being rejected from that.»
I’m telling you right now, you have permission to loose and bind things in your life; that’s what God gives us. If you give God the ability to give you a vision and you give Him permission, then God is so faithful; He always provides. Man, God started surrounding me with books, commentaries, videos, and a community of people who would say, «Okay, I’m struggling; I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I’m dying on the inside.» I allowed God to give me a cocoon of resources and people. The best thing He ever gave me was my wife. The greatest provision God ever gave me was Natalie Todd.
I remember two years ago, walking through a deliverance process. Let me say this: if it took you 20 years to get into it, you might have to walk out of it. I know everyone in church tries to make it seem like God can take it away in an instant. That wasn’t my story. I walked into it, and I had to walk out of it all the way into marriage. God showed me something that happened to me. A little neighborhood boy came over to our house when I was young and began playing with my private area. I had pushed that memory so far out of my mind that I didn’t share it with anyone. A year ago—maybe two, while leading the church and doing great things for God—the enemy tried to bring that memory back up and cloud me with shame.
I didn’t even do it; I didn’t even ask for it—it happened to me. But that perversion tried to still have a hold on me while I was touching the whole world. God made a provision! I was at the office at 15:19, and I called Natalie. I said, «I’ve got to tell you something.» She said, «What? Come here!» I ran home in the middle of the day and found her in the bedroom. I was on the floor, a grown man crying in her lap, saying, «Baby, this happened to me when I was young.» At that moment, God’s provision came through my wife. She began to speak into me the grace of God, telling me how valuable I was to Him. She began to tell me that this was the last day that this could ever have a hold on me because God does not work in darkness—He only works in the light.
I can’t tell you what the prayer was, and I can’t tell you what happened, but I know that day God sent provision through another human being to pray for me and hold me accountable—to understand my struggle more deeply. Then God took me from a place of perversion and brought me to another door. Somebody say, «Another door.» See, when you allow God to do it, there’s another door. Somebody say, «Another door.» When you allow God to give you a vision of who He wants you to be, you don’t watch the images; you don’t stay on the pornography. You don’t go there. You move into the permission for God to do whatever He wants in your life. If you want me to be a pastor, if you want me to lead these young people, if you want me to stay here or go there, you have permission to do whatever you want.
God, You are a great provider. I was young, but now I’m old, and I’ve never seen the righteous forsaken. If you want deliverance, God said He’ll provide for you. When you walk through this door, the door of perversion is no longer an option. God turns the door of perversion into the door of promise. Somebody needs to shout with me right now that God is exposing the lies, and today is going to be the day that some of you, for the first time in your life, say, «I’m done with perversion! I’m knocking down the door of my promise!» Somebody just got a shot of praise right there! I said, give God a shout of praise right there! Somebody’s promise is being unlocked right now. Freedom is coming to you right now! It’s time for the promise.
But that’s why I can no longer compromise with pornography. I can no longer let those images in. I don’t care if they’re on social media—whatever it may be. Delete them! If they arouse you in any way, cut them off! If that show makes you feel tingling in areas that aren’t supposed to be tingling, stop watching it! But it’s my favorite show! Is it worth your destiny? Because once perversion is there, it knows no bounds, as the Bible says. The flesh is never satisfied.
So today, I’m asking you: let’s not just get a vision, permission, provision, and a promise for the wrong things. Let’s get it for the right things! That’s why God says in Philippians—this is my favorite verse in the entire Bible—because this verse got me out of my pornography addiction: «For it is God who works in you, both to will and to do His good pleasure.» Another translation says, «He gives you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.» I confess this over my life all the time: I don’t just want the desire, God! People have tried to stop pornography with willpower. That ain’t gonna work! You need the power of the Holy Spirit! And today, some of you need to surrender your sexuality completely and fully to God.
You can’t do this without the Holy Spirit. So, practically, Pastor Mike, what do I do? The first thing I had to do was confess. I want you to write this down: confess! You need to tell somebody, and I know this one hurts. You feel like this could damage some relationships, or this might be the end of your marriage, or this may be the thing that takes you out. This is what I’m asking everyone: extend the grace you need right now to others.
Wives, let me talk to you for a second: this is going to be the first time that some of your husbands may tell you the truth. I feel this strongly in my spirit. Remember, God can only work in the truth. They’ve been scared because they love you, and if they tell you, they know it could hurt you and break your heart. It will hurt, but I’m asking you to lovingly restore them with grace. Be what they need right now, and then you can heal together. But there’s more, some men listening to this: today is the day you get to come out. You get to tell the truth. You get to live in real freedom, and yes, there are going to be consequences. But do you know what happens when the enemy loses his power over your life? You experience freedom.
I have been free from pornography for over five years, and when I tell you this, remember, I’ve been married for ten years. It followed me into my marriage; it was on and off as I tried to figure out how to stop. But now, I brought my wife into the fight with me. We have code words now. I say, «Girl, I’m thirsty,» and she replies, «I’m a water fountain.» You hear me? Whatever you need, we can fight together because the enemy wants you to be divided; he wants to divide and conquer. But God wants you to be unified because only in unity is there a commanded blessing. This is where we pull the cover off in the church today and say, «We’re going to tell the truth even if the truth hurts.» You need to confess.
Let me put it this way: you have to confess to God and repent to Him for forgiveness. So, some of you at the end of this service are going to tell God, «God, I’m sorry, I’m repenting, I’m turning from this,» and God is faithful to forgive you. But He doesn’t stop there. Most of us want to just stop at confessing to God, but He clearly says in His word in James that you have to confess one to another. You have to confess to people for healing. So, you confess to God for forgiveness, but you have to confess to another person for healing, and that’s what I’ve done with my wife, with my pastors, and with my mentors. I’ve confessed, «This is my struggle, this is what I dealt with.»
And I can’t tell you what happens, but God, by His grace, allows you to feel this burden lift. It’s like something comes off of you because you are no longer holding something you were never meant to hold. This is going to be the practical step that some of you make. «Pastor, give me another practical step.» Okay, I’ve got you right now: you need accountability. You cannot do this alone. You need community. You need correction. And watch this «C» word—Amber Lee talked about it earlier today—and you need counseling. Christians need counseling. You can have faith and still have undealt with trauma. You need somebody to help you unpack that.
Someone needed to help me unpack the perversion that happened to me when I was young. You need somebody to help you unpack the way you felt in your family or never felt significant or were overly sexualized or whatever it was that happened. You need somebody to help you unpack that so you can truly live in freedom. And then you need community around you. I was able to tell my closest friends four months ago what happened to me as a young child. They gathered around me. Even when I heard that they heard it, I was embarrassed and ashamed, but they said, «Hey, listen, this is what happened to me, and this is how we’re praying for you, and this is how we’re standing with you.»
That community and that counseling, and even correction, might turn that off. Give me the passwords to that. If you are anywhere close to me, you know the passwords to my phone and my email. I have to be around people I trust because everybody knows my passwords. Why? Because I lived in secret too long, so now I have to go to the opposite end of the spectrum. I don’t have any reflective glass where nobody next to me can’t see my phone. I leave everything open because I will not be pulled back into bondage. I will stay free. There are all types of resources available to you. You can get things with Covenant Eyes, and you can read books like «Every Man’s Battle,» and all of that, but you need to come back to the dig on Wednesday nights because we’re going to give you practical resources.
We’re going to work you through it; we’re going to give you wisdom. Pornography can no longer defeat God’s people. And if you want to change and transform, it’s available to you, but you’re going to need to confess, you’re going to need accountability, and this one thing helped me: you’re going to have to fast. Now, I know this isn’t a popular term in church, but the Bible tells us in Mark 9:29 that some things only change by prayer and fasting. I can tell you that when you stop the cravings for food and lustful things, it does something in your spiritual life. You push away something, but it’s teaching you the same stamina to be able to say no to the enemy. While I’m saying no to this, I’m pressing into this. Why? It’s not just a diet; I’m saying no to the things my flesh wants and yes to the things that God wants. Some of you need to fast, fast all TV, fast all social media, fast sugar, fast sweets.
When I say this, how badly do you want to change? How badly do you want this to stop in your bloodline? Will history say that you were the one who took a stand and became a man of purity and value or a woman of virtue? The last thing that really helped me was generosity. I didn’t know it would help me, but when I decided to start tithing for real, something broke off of my life in the area of perversion. I used to put my treasure into things that would provide for my perversion. I used to pay for websites; I put extra gas money in the car to go to people’s houses and do different things. I was putting my treasure—like the Bible says in Matthew 6—"where your treasure is, your heart will be also.»
When I made a decision to put my treasure in the kingdom of God, it was like my heart was ripped from perversion, and it went to the things of the kingdom. I don’t know who this is for because you may have tried everything, but this is one thing you might not have tried. I’m telling you freedom came to me as I began to do this. My wife, Natalie, and I made a decision. Whenever we get paid, at least 10% goes to God’s local house. We began to do that, and I’m telling you the level of freedom. You know when something was on you, but you could still feel it even when it was off you? I’m telling you, I didn’t feel that weight anymore.
Some of you need to walk down these steps and let God take you and lead you into a new level of living. I had to tell the truth today because perversion and pornography will no longer be able to ravage the people of God any longer—not without you knowing. It starts with the little image, the little thing, the pre-vision. If you give it too many pre-visions, you’re going to give it permission. If you give it permission, you’ll start making provision for it. And if you make provision for it, it turns into perversion. But God can give you a pre-vision of who you will be, and you can give Him permission to come into your life. You can bind those things that are not like Him, and then you will start experiencing the provision of God to give you everything you need, both the desire and the power to do what pleases Him, and you will end up in your promise.
I am in my promise right now, and I know some of y’all are saying, «Pastor Mike, I can’t do that. You don’t know how messed up I am.» The Bible tells us that all have sinned; everybody has sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Religion would make you feel ashamed, but I told my story so you don’t have to feel any type of way about being clean. I’m the pastor of the church, and I just told you how deep I was in sin. God can free you. Sin comes to do what it does. When God made us, we came here into this fallen world with a pre-vision. We watched a little porn, we went through trauma—we were molested, we were hurt, we messed up. It happened; we were drunk in college, and somebody gave me some pills.
My life felt stained, and God says He wants me to be pure and holy. But how can I do that? Then, I enter into a relationship with somebody, and I call it my relationship goal, but all that happens are soul ties. Us connecting and all those one-night stands don’t keep things clean; my filth makes them filthy. And then Jesus comes and sees that everybody He loves would be steeped in sin. God in Him made a plan and said, «You’re going to have to go down because nobody on earth knows how to be pure anymore. I need you to take all of the punishment and pain they should experience for their sin.»
The wages of sin leads to death, but He says, «I don’t want to give them that penalty, so I need you to take it. All they have to do is receive what you did for them, and then I’ll allow them to pour everything they did— that sin—into you. When it comes into you, I’ll take what the world said was supposed to take you out, and I’ll turn it white as snow.» I feel prophetically that this is what God is doing as you surrender to Him. But God, I’m still filthy? He says surrender! Would you please submerge your life, the lies, the perversion, the pornography, the pain, the molestation? Would you please submerge it in Me? If you would put it in Me, I’ll overflow you; I’ll allow that thing to wash you. I feel the presence of God right here. Everything—the abuse, the lies of the world, everything the enemy tried to create in you—I’ll make you white as snow. I’ll take it off and make you clean. Hallelujah! Thank you, God!
Today, God is saying, «I’ll take your filthy rags, and if you submit them and surrender them to Me, I’ll make you white as snow.» It’s taken me a long time to get to this point, but I feel deliverance in this house right now. If you’ve been walking around trying to do good works and be better—all based on self-will—today is the day to surrender your sexuality. It took us 19 sessions to get right here, but today God is saying it’s time to give up and allow me to not just let you compromise anymore.
I want to give you My promise. My promise is that I’ll save you, I’ll heal you, I’ll deliver you, and I will set you free. If you want freedom today, on the count of three, I want you to lift your hand wherever you are. It doesn’t matter who is there; it doesn’t matter who’s around. This is not about them; this is about you and God. Some of you are 65 years old and need freedom, 72 years old and need freedom, 18 years old and need freedom, or even seven years old and need freedom. God says, «I’m here to give you freedom right now.»
If that’s you, on one, you’re making the greatest decision of your life. Whether you know how to pray or not, I need you to pray right now because eternity is in the balance. Two, you’re making the greatest decision, and your name is going to be written in the Lamb’s Book of Life. This decision you’re about to make took me from being a liar, a manipulator, and deeply perverted, and it changed me—not into a perfect man, but a progressing man—and that’s through this one decision. Three, lift your hands all over the world, even on rebroadcast right now. There are people making a decision to surrender to God. Put your hand down. I feel the presence of God wrapping His arms around you right now.
Come on, just wrap your arms around yourself like this. I feel the presence of God. He’s coming to give you peace; He’s not shaming you anymore. He’s not giving you guilt anymore; He’s taking it all away. Somebody just pray this prayer. We do not pray alone. There are tens of thousands of people going to pray with you right now. Just say this:
God, thank You for sending Jesus for my sin. Today, I ask You to be my Lord and Savior. I turn from perversion, and I turn to my promise. My promise is You. I believe You lived and You died just for me, and today I surrender. Today I surrender. Today I surrender. Change me, renew me, transform me; I’m Yours. In Jesus' name, amen.