Michael Todd - Lay with Fire
What's going on Switch? I said what's going on Switch? Yo, I am so excited to be here tonight, and I am really excited about what God's gonna do tonight. So I need everybody to pull out your smartphones, your dumb phones, or some notepads, because we're about to get into a message that I'm very very passionate about. I'm thankful for Pastor Craig and the whole Switch team for allowing me to be here tonight, and they've given me a short amount of time to cover a big topic.
Tonight, we're talking about sex. Imma look right into the camera. No, I really wanna talk about this thing, and I'm passionate about it, because when I was growing up, I was in church. I had parents who loved God. I've been all around the world, and sung all the songs, but nobody ever really talked to me about relationships, and how they were actually supposed to be. So what ended up happening is culture defined relationships for me, people that probably weren't the best examples defined relationships for me. Sex was a taboo topic. The only instruction I got in church about sex is don't have it until you're married. That's it.
Well, that's not very extensive. And what happens when you've already done it? And what happens when you were exposed to something at a young age that you never thought you would've been exposed to? And what happens when you go to locker rooms and over to your friend's house, and they're talking about things that your parents don't even know you know about? What happens when you're faced with the awkward position of prom night? Oh, I'm coming to everybody's house tonight. See, because if the church doesn't talk about these things, then we leave it open for the world to define. And I really think that I would've been saved a lot if I would've had somebody who would've just been like, will you just put the pastor thing down for a second and be real with me?
And for the next seventeen minutes, Imma be so real with you. That I hope it's going to bring truth to your life. 'Cause John tells us that truth is the only thing that can really set us free. And the statistics that are out here right now when it comes to the topic of sex are scary. That stat... The statistics say... Don't, just keep that in, keep that in, I want that. The statistics say that 50% of every person that is in high school right now has had a sexual experience. It's 50%. So that means half this room. Nobody's gonna raise their hand or say anything. But have had some type of sexual experience. They also say that that number is higher for African Americans. 78% of African Americans will have a sexual experience before they get out of high school. 52% for Hispanic, 47% for white people. Yay white people.
Anyway, what I'm saying to you is everybody is exposed to this thing, but what does God say about this thing? The first thing that I want you to understand... The title of my message tonight is: Lay with Fire, 'cause when you lay down to have sex, you're laying with fire. And what you don't understand is if you don't know what it was meant for, when it was meant for, and what you're supposed to do with it, it will burn you. And many people are in relationships with charred people. Many people are in relationships with people who are burnt up, do you understand what I'm saying? They've been in so many things, and they played with fire, and they realized that they weren't in the place to be in a relationship like that, they did not have God's blessing, they didn't know what they were doing.
And so they go through life from person to person to person to person to person, and they get burned and burned and burned and burned, and then they try to present themself as something that's spotless. But it has a bunch of singes and broken pieces and I really believe that God wants everybody that's hearing this message tonight to know that there is a better way. Everybody say "a better way". No, say it like you mean it, say "a better way". And everybody, let me tell you want the better way is. It's God's way. And I know culture will never tell you this, 'cause it won't come on TMZ, it won't come on E, it won't come on your news feed, but God's way is the better way to handle relationships and sex. And this is the first thing you have to get in your mind.
Take this note down, you've never written this note down before in your whole life, I promise you, it's a good one. Sex was God's idea. See, most people think that it's a bad thing, it's a taboo thing, no no no. This was God's idea. This is what, she giggled... This was God's idea. And until you give the purity and the validity back to it that God didn't make sex bad, He made it good, and He made it, then we allow other people in society to pervert it. Let me prove it to you. Let's go to Genesis, 'cause a lot of y'all are looking at me like, I ain't never took that note in my whole life. Look at this, Genesis 1:28, it says, "Then God said, 'be fruitful and multiply.'"
This was the first command ever given to man. This was not an agricultural command. It wasn't, be fruitful and grow some strawberries. What He was saying in this moment is, "Adam. Hey, I gave you this wife, hey bro, check me out. Y'all go over there, do your thang, you hear what I'm saying? Like, be fruitful and multiply". Listen, it was God's idea, and God blessed it. And until we get back to the biblical model that this was, do y'all understand that the first command was not to go and pray? It was to be fruitful and multiply. This was God's plan for procreation, for intimacy, for relationship with people. And so sex was God's idea.
Now, I'm gonna take it one step further, and I'm gonna push you, and this is gonna feel weird, but I want everybody to say that, say "sex", you couldn't even say it, look at you, you're like, oh my God, S-E-X. Sex, everybody say "sex was God's idea". That is the first thing you need to plant in your heart, because when it is God's timing, and when it's right, it is the most pleasurable, amazing thing that produces so much life, because anything God makes, He makes it to be enjoyable and to be a blessing. And this is what God wants for each one of us. And I wanna go a little further. Go to Mark chapter 10 verse six. And it says, but God made them male and female. That means God made our parts, God made our desires, our urges, our appetite, he said He made them from the beginning of creation.
This explains why a man leaves his father and mother, and they're married, and is joined. Everybody say "joined". When I studied this word in the Hebrew and the Greek, it means so much more than what we think. It's a three-fold word. Joined means you're joined physically, through the act of sex, joined emotionally, in intimacy, and then joined in covenant, spiritually. Like, when they say you have sex, you're joined in the physical act, emotionally, and spiritually. See, we don't think about that, because we can go places and Netflix and Chill. We can go places and hook up. What you don't know is that every time you hook up, you are joining to that person physically, emotionally, and spiritually. And it's supposed to be something that's never broken apart.
And so that's why when you just hook up with that person and you rip it away, they always take a piece of you. Because it was supposed to be a bond that was only done with one person, one time, and so if you're hooking up with them, and you rip away, and then you hook up with them and you rip away, and you hook up with them and you rip away you will never be everything God called you to be because people are walking around with pieces of you. Oh, I'm preaching good. All I'm trying to say to you is when God wanted a man and a woman to be connected, it was because they were supposed to be the one they were connected with for life.
And I know society says, you only live once, YOLO... no, believers, we live twice. And what we do down here matters. And us reaching purpose, and so many people connect with people, and they don't realize, see, the things is, it's so much deeper, and you form these things called soul ties. They're gonna have to bring me back and have a whole nother session on just soul ties. Because what happens is, when you connect with people emotionally, what happens is the things that they deal with, they struggle with, it gets on you. You never were mad before. But you had a sexual relationship with that person, and now you're angry all the time. It's because you didn't just connect physically. You connected emotionally and spiritually.
And people used to have so much purpose. And so much confidence. And so much going for them, and then they make that wrong decision, and connected with people outside of the covenant of marriage, and then it robs something from them. All I'm here to tell you tonight, is that there is a process that God wants this whole idea of sex to be in that will produce life from you, not rob you. And so, when I look at this, and I look at this, they should be joined, it says, to his wife, and the two are united into, everybody say "one". Since they are no longer two, but one... It's funny when the scripture says the same thing back to back, 'cause it knows we'll be remedial, and we won't understand it, be like, oh, whatchu mean? Like, two, into one? He say yes, two into, what? One. And he said, let no one split apart what God has joined together.
This tells you that when you're coming to do this act, God's trying to join this together, and He says, don't let anybody split apart, but it's crazy, you've had 16 boyfriends. And seven sex partners. And you're 19. The crazy thing about it, is, when God, back in the day, recognized a marriage, was not when there was a wedding dress, and groomsmen, and cute pics on Instagram. That's not when the marriage was sealed. The marriage was consummated when the man and the wife came together in the marriage bed, and they had sex. Because there's a blood transfer that happens there, and all these things happen right in that moment, and God says, that's where covenant started. Like, that right there, that's what I'm blessing. And this is the thing, when you have sex with somebody outside of marriage, you're saying "I do" without the covenant.
How many people are you married to, that you didn't really wanna be with? I'm trying to tell you 'cause nobody told me. And so I thought I was just being a guy, and doing all these other things, and I'm sad to say I wasn't a virgin when I got married to my wife, because I was trying to do things how society told me. But there were pieces of me that got taken prematurely. There were pieces of me that I was trying to prove myself to other people, and robbed me. Images that were planted in my mind that it took years to get out, because I was not doing things the way God wanted it to be done. But as soon as I found out, I said, why wouldn't somebody tell me? That's why I'm sweating here on my nose right now. 'Cause I want you to, with everything in you, know that there is a better way, and it's God's way. Because God has a plan of one. Everybody say "one".
Let me give you God's plan of one, and I want you to write this down, maybe you need to tattoo it on your back, something like that. But let me tell you God's plan of one. God's plan was there to, every person to have it. One God, with one man and one woman, one marriage, one sex partner, one flesh, one lifetime, one picture. That's what God wants for every one of us, and I know some people like, well, Pastor Mike, am I excluded? 'Cause... My one is gone. I didn't know. Matter of fact, I got somebody in my phone right now, that we were planning this weekend to hook up. But, I'm hearing what you're saying, and maybe there's a different way for me to do this, and what I'm saying is, thank God for the grace of God.
That looks beyond all of your faults, everything you've ever done, everything you did yesterday, everything you were planning to do, and He says, "that's why I sent Pastor Mike to you today". That's why we're doing this series, that's why. Because I wanna give you a hope and a future that is so much more than you could have in a moment of pleasure. I wanna give you something that can change you, and be a gift for the one you're supposed to be with, and change the eternity of your family. But that means that you're gonna have to make a decision today, because if sex was God's idea, point number two, sex has been perverted. Like, you can scroll on your Instagram feed and see twerking contests, people talking about who they hooked up with. The only reason I'm saying this is because it's become normal to you.
Come on, let's be honest, if we see a sex scene in a movie, and our parents start tripping out, like, oh my God, turn your head, you're like, oh my God, Mom. I've already seen this. Let's be honest. Because it's normalized now. And what the enemy's plan is to do, and he's been doing it since he was in the garden, he wants to pervert everything that God says is good, and he wants you to think it's bad, so that you do those things and desire the things that are not like him. And nobody ever told me. Because when this thing was perverted in my head, it messed me up. Just like it messed a lot of people up in 1 Corinthians. Paul was talking to a group of people who lived in an area of Corinth, and back then, it was the equivalent of the Las Vegas strip.
And some of you know what they say about Vegas. What happens in Vegas... And see, y'all ain't even old enough to drive, and look at y'all, already know it. No, I'm just playing. And so, this place catered to lust, catered to sin. And Paul was talking to people who were trying to come out of that lifestyle, they had given their life to Jesus, but they were trying to figure out how to live in this sexually charged culture. And that sounds like today, when we literally can wake up in the morning and scroll on our newsfeed, and an image being planted in our heart, or listen to our favorite song, and it's talking about certain things.
Well, I want you to see how God used Paul to help these people overcome and figure out a pattern to be able to live a pure life in a sexually perverse society. Look what it says, 1 Corinthians chapter six verse nine. Don't you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the kingdom of God? And I love this part, don't fool yourselves. And many of us are fooling ourselves, that we can reach the full potential of God's plan but still have this area of hidden sexual sin in our lives. And it's one of those things that'll take you out in the ninth season 'cause nobody else will know, but you'll know. And it'll be that one thing that's a crack for the enemy when you're about to go to your highest height, he is able to pull on that thing, and I had that thing in my life for years. And I was fooling myself, like, I'm going after God, I'm doing these things, but I'm typing in these websites.
And I'm sitting down with these people. And I'm doing it just 'cause it's my birthday. And all these excuses that we give ourselves, but God's telling us, and I'm telling you, don't fool yourself. You will not inherit the kingdom of God. And some of you are saying, well, what does 'do wrong' mean in this, people who do wrong will not... They go on and clarify, look at it. Those who indulge in sexual sins, who worship idols, commit adultery, male prostitutes, practice homosexuality, are thieves, greedy people, and I like that one, 'cause all of y'all, some of y'all are so self-righteous, that you was like, that's not me, Pastor, that's not me Pastor, that's not me, and then they say greed, that's you. You won't even share your fries.
Anyway, but he's saying all these people will not inherit the kingdom of God, not drunkards, or people who are abusive, cheat people, none of these will inherit the kingdom of God. And then it goes on to say verse 11, some of you were once like that. I can stand and say that. Like, I unashamedly stand and say, I was not a good person. I was addicted to pornography. I was a manipulator, I had sex before I got married. How can you stand, Pastor Mike, and so boldly say that? Because the grace of God delivered me. I once was like that. And I think this is the problem with our generation. People who were once like that, they try to hide it.
Some of y'all parents was ratchet and wild. But they never share it with you because they think they might expose you to something too early. But because of the blood of Jesus and what he did in my heart, I'm not what I wanna be, but I'm not who I used to be. And I overcome by the blood of the Lamb and the words of my testimony. So how do I stay free? I gotta talk about it. How do you stay free? You gotta talk about it. Some of you have overcome things but the enemy's trying to come back with those things 'cause you never told anybody that used to be you. And this is how we overcome... I'm getting too hype in here.
It's just because I remember climbing in windows. Trying to fulfill an appetite that would never be quenched until Jesus came into my heart. I remember doing what everybody else thought was popular and feeling empty and crying myself to sleep at night. And if it wasn't for the grace of God, and that's what Paul is saying, he says, some of you were once like that. But you were cleansed, you were made holy, you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the spirit of our God. This is something I just wanna tell everybody. You may not be down with all this Jesus stuff and Christian stuff, and you have all these other things that are speaking for your attention, but the Church will try to tell you sometimes that you need to change before God can change you.
But this tells us that God is not obsessed with your habits. He wants your heart. And if He ever gets your heart, He'll help you change your habits. And this is what you need to know and I need to know, because some of you are so deep in stuff, and sexual impurity and sin and frustration and lust, that you're like, I don't know how to do this. What I'm telling you is you don't have to know. But I know somebody who knows how to do this. And you can call on the name of Jesus. Somebody shout at me "Jesus". Come on, one more time, say "Jesus". That's the name that changes everything. You hear what I'm saying? And when you call on that name, no matter what you're in, it's the name that sends Christ like a flood. And it helps you get out of the things that you were in. And this is the crazy thing that nobody told me. When you allow sexual impurity into your life, it never comes alone. It invites everybody else in with it.
See, when you start being sexually impure, lying comes in, deception, doubt, selfishness, you've never met anybody who's sexually impure, but a good person, really, on the inside. When you invite that in, it brings all of its friends. And that's why this is one of the biggest things that he was telling these people, because they started saying, well, you say, we're allowed to do anything, verse 12. But not everything is good for you. And even though I'm allowed to do anything, I must not become a slave to anything. My question for you tonight, Switch, is what are you a slave to? Are you still trying to figure out, is this sin? Is this sin? Is this sin? Is this sin? Or have you made a decision to push back from what culture says, and say, I don't even have to be on the line. I know who I am in Christ, and I'm not trying to figure out what's a sin or not, I'm trying to figure out, will this help me reach purpose or not? Is this relationship gonna push me into the place God has called me to be?
Pastor Mike, again, why are you so passionate about this? Because I found out that this whole series is like, when can I have it, when can I have sex? When can I have it? The thing that I found out is that sex has a container. And the container for sex is marriage. It's such a powerful thing. Such an amazing thing. That God says, I have to give this thing a container. Or it can damage everything it comes in contact with. We just saw how fire uncontained can literally burn up people's entire lives on the West Coast. Houses and cars and people have died because wildfire. But the same fire that can kill stuff is the same fire that heats your home. The same fire that allows you to cook your food. Why is it different? Because it's in the right container.
What I'm telling you is that passion that you have, God knew it was there, I remember praying this prayer one time, God, why would you not just take these urges away until I get married? And I know you've prayed it too. He said, because I need to teach you how to have self-control. And He said, you can't have self-control by yourself. You have to allow me to live through you, and give you the things, and have you live a spirit-empowered life. I wanna show you one picture, because I want this to stay in your mind. This changed me forever. Water is a powerful force. And water in the right container can power an entire city. This water going in the right direction is giving light, bringing life, bringing entertainment to so many people. But this same water outside of the container causes devastation.
Look at this. This is Houston. People lost everything. And even when the waters receded, there was mildew and drywall that was rotted. There will always be signs that this place was met by something that wasn't controlled. I don't want your life to look like that. Sex was God's idea, but sex has been perverted. And now, what we have to do is submit our sexuality back to God. What are you saying Pastor Mike? I don't care what you've done, and I don't care what's happened to you.
Today, you can change the tide by saying, God, I'm presenting You my life. And I'm giving You my sexuality. I'm gonna make a decision to wait until you bring the right person into my life, and we get married so that we can have the container. That when we have sex, it'll be amazing! But until then, all my affection is for You. If you're in this room today like me, had to make a decision, God, I'm about to surrender my sexuality back to You, I wanna pray for you. If you're in here, and I don't care who's around you, and I don't care who you came with, because this is not about them. This is about you. If you're saying, like me, God I need to surrender my sexuality, for the first time or again, I want you to lift your hands. I want to pray for you right now. Come on, all over this building. So many courageous people. I'm so proud of you. Let me pray for you:
Father, I thank You. God, this is a hard topic to talk about, but there's some people of faith in here that have made a decision, Father God, to say I need it. And Father, everything that we've been doing in the DMs, and everything that we've been watching on the down-low, and everything that's happened to us, and everything we won't even speak about, some people have been silent this whole time, God, 'cause they didn't even know that You cared this much about them, but Father I'm thanking You as they surrender, You take over. Father, I'm thanking You that everything that has tried to come and damage them and hurt them and stain them, today, Father God, You are bringing them into a knowing that this thing about their sexuality was all Your idea, and now we have to do it Your way. Thank you for the self-control, the spirit-empowered life of freedom, that allows people to obey You, to withstand, to not listen to culture, and to obey Your word. And Father, for that person in here who's struggling 'cause it's been going on so long, it's been a cycle, and they feel like they can't break it, God, I'm thanking You that Your power, Your spirit comes in to break the chains of lust, perversion, hurt, today is a new day as we surrender our sexuality to You.
Listen, while people's eyes are still closed, and heads still bowed, maybe you've never accepted Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior. This is where it all changed for me. We're not asking you to change everything you're doing today, God says, again, if I get your heart, I'll help you change your habits. And there are people in this room that are saying I'm tired of doing it my way. It doesn't work. I'm tired of putting on facades and fake, and filtering everything to make it seem right. I want real peace. I want real joy. I want real love. And that's only found in Jesus Christ. If you're in this room, and I feel this with everything in me, there's several people in every room that need to make a decision to make Jesus Christ the captain of your life.
Today, if that's you in this room, I want you to make the step that changed me not into a perfect man, but into a progressing man. And I'm telling you, on the count of three, when you lift your hand, I believe something is going to happen in you. All over this room, if that's you, one, we're so proud of you, two, I'm thanking God for you, three, if you wanna make Jesus Christ your personal Lord and Savior, I am so excited for you. Come on, just put your hands down right now. At Switch, we're a family. Nobody prays alone. So I want everybody to pray this prayer with me for the benefit of those who are coming to Christ. There were several people in this room, and if this was for nobody else but you, this was all worth it. Everybody together, just say:
God, we need You. Thank You for sending Jesus for my sin. For my mess-ups. Today, I ask you to be the Lord of my life. Thank You for living and dying just for me. I make You my Lord and Savior. Change me, renew me. Transform me. I'm Yours. In Jesus' name, Amen.