Mensa Otabil - A Soft Answer
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We are looking at the Book of Proverbs. There’s a lot to learn from the Book of Proverbs; it’s a book of wisdom, and it teaches us practical ways to handle life when there is stress, when we’re tired, and when we need guidance. The Book of Proverbs has a lot to teach us, and when you take time to look at it, you’ll realize that words play a significant role throughout the book. Almost in every chapter, there is something said about the effect of words on our lives.
So, in Proverbs chapter 15, there’s so much to learn about words. We start from verse number one, and it says, «A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.» Today’s lesson from Proverbs tells us how not to escalate situations when conversations are getting heated. The Bible tells us that a soft answer turns away wrath. The word that is translated as «soft» means gentle, kind, or a good answer-an answer that responds with gentleness and kindness. It doesn’t change the truth, but the structure and composition of the truth are kind and gentle.
The passage says that it turns away wrath. The Hebrew word translated as «wrath» here carries the idea of something heated up -something hot and poisonous. These days, we might call it toxic. The picture here is of people who are talking, and as they are talking, the argument or whatever they’re saying escalates. It gets heated up, and everybody knows someone’s going to say something at that moment, and everything will go haywire. The Bible says that when the conversation heats up, a soft answer will dissipate the wrath, which is very helpful whether in a marriage or in any relationship. When you sense that things are heating up and the atmosphere is becoming toxic, think of how to respond.
A soft answer will dissipate the situation, but then it says a harsh word will stir up anger. When we are in that situation and things are heated, a harsh word is going to spoil everything. The word that is translated as «harsh» means something that pierces, something prickly, something that causes pain. You know many times, when we are talking with people-especially in a debate-when emotions are high, a word drops into our heads and you know, «When I say this, it’s going to hurt; it’s going to sting,» and you actually know the effect it’s going to have. You probably know it’s going to destroy this marriage or ruin this relationship, but we are so caught up in the heat of the moment that we release a harsh answer, a harsh word, and it pierces and cuts. All of a sudden, everything is destroyed.
So Proverbs is telling us that when we are in that situation, we should not intentionally say something that will cause pain to the other person. We should not intentionally say something that will pierce the other. We should not say anything that boils up the anger. The word for anger there is heat, something that just explodes, and everything gets destroyed. So think about it the next time you’re talking, the next time you’re in an argument-when things are boiling up-remember Proverbs: A soft answer will dissipate the situation, will cool down tempers, and you will live another day to resolve that problem-even if you don’t resolve it in that debate at that time.
Let’s pray. Say with me: «Heavenly Father, teach me to speak gently and kindly. Let my words bring healing to a hurting world. In Jesus' name, amen and amen.»