Matt Hagee - A House Divided
We live in a nation that's divided. And the words of Mark 3:25 have been presented to us in hours of crisis before. The first time that they were used in a political speech, it was recorded in the race for the U.S. Senate in the state of Illinois, June 16, 1858. On the list of candidates that day was a young republican attorney by the name of Abraham Lincoln. And he wrote these words to the republican party in the state of Illinois. He said, "A house divided against itself cannot stand". Now one of his advisors told him, "Abe, if you put that line in this speech, you'll lose the election".
Mr. Lincoln replied with these words: he said, "I didn't author these words. The Almighty did. If there is an offense or a complaint, please take it up with him". He delivered the speech, and just as he was told, he lost. In 1858, Abraham Lincoln lost the senate seat in the state of Illinois. One of his critics said, "The speech of 1858 may have cost him the senate, but it won him the White House". At a time when the nation needed someone to stand on the convictions of truth, that kind of character won president Lincoln the White House.
Well, like Lincoln of old, I believe today, if we are going to change the direction of this nation, we have got to be willing to stand up for conviction upon God's truth. Right now, the Word of God may be considered politically incorrect. And in this hypersensitive world, simple truths may sound harsh and offensive. So what? We've got to get back to standing up for God's truth, because it is that truth that will set you free. And people say, "Well, we live in a world where everybody has their own truth". No, they don't! There is no your truth and my truth. There is only his truth. "Thy word is true". And today, we're going to use the truth to define the roles and relationships that God has for those that he created. They're called male and female.
I hate to break it to you, but there's only two options, and you're either one or you're the other. The Bible says, "If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do"? And the foundation of the relationship between male and female is exactly how God designed the world to work. It's his natural order. Hebrews tells us that by the word of the Lord, we understand that the world was framed. The foundation and the framing of any structure is how it stands upright. If the foundation is gone, the building falls in from top to bottom. If the framing is gone, the building falls in all directions.
Right now, our world is falling inside out and upside down. Why? Because we have removed the foundation of God's natural order, and we are ignoring his word upon which our world is structured. So as simple as it sounds, we've got to get back to being men of God and women of faith, or the future is lost. And there is no government program that's going to make that easier. The thing that's going to make it possible is the decision that you and I make to be who God created us to be. So today, we're here at a day of decision for each and every one of us. The time has come, mister, to decide: are we going to be who God called us to be, or are we simply going to be numbered among the masses, content to live and die, and never make a difference?
I don't believe that God of providence and sovereignty put you on this earth not to make a difference. The difference that you make may not be enshrined in a hall of fame. The difference that you make may not be inscribed on walls of honor. But if the difference you make is to love your wife, and lead your family, and teach them the principles of God's word, then the difference that you make will last for all of eternity. The time has come to answer the question that Joshua asked his generation in Joshua 24. He said, "Choose you this day whom you will serve". And he said, "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord".
Child of God, I am here to tell you, as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord, the Lord who made heaven and earth. It is the Lord who gave us the life that we live. It is the Lord who provides us and protects us in all of our ways. The God that we serve is a God who never fails. He is a God who is present in our past, who is helping us today, and is making a way in our tomorrows. The God that we serve is a God who moves mountains of impossibilities, and bridges the great divide. He's the God who breaks yokes of bondage and sets captives free. The God that we serve is mighty to save. He is able to deliver. He is called faithful and true.
So as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord! We have to understand who God created us to be and why he created us that way. For the balance of this message, I want to give you a point of alignment that will bring your family into proper order. And let me begin by saying there are no perfect families. Do you know why? Because you're in them. Ephesians 5:23, it says, "The husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church". Say that with me. "The husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church". Now everybody wants to get stuck on the first half of the verse, "The husband is the head of the wife". But the reality of it is, is both the husband and the wife are to be submitted to Christ who is the head of the church.
Before the wife can submit to the husband, the husband has to be in his proper place, which is submitted to Christ. You can't ask her to follow if you can't be led. A godly man has a role to play, because real men love Jesus. And they live for Jesus. And they have six traits that prove it. Let's begin with the first one.
Godly men are confident. Your confidence, as a man of God, comes from the Word of God. The Bible says that faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God. We read in the Word of God, "We walk by faith, and not by sight". The point is this: if, as a godly man, you're not connected to the word, you're walking blind. There's no way you can have confidence walking, even in familiar places, with your eyes closed.
And men, who do not read the Word of God, are walking around with their eyes closed. They're aware of the things that are around them, but they can't see well enough to know what to do, when to move, when to stop, when to start. And it's impossible to live in confidence when you're blindfolded. Confidence comes from the Word of God. Men of God are committed. Hebrews 3:14, it says, "We have become partakers of Christ if we hold the beginning of our confidence steadfast to the end". Say that with me. "To the end".
Godly men are committed men, because they don't quit. And sooner or later, in this life, quit will look really good. But godly men don't quit: they endure. They don't quit on their God. They don't quit on their marriages. They don't quit on their kids. They don't quit on their grand kids. They endure. They set an example. They make up their mind: I can do all things through Christ. They refuse to give in.
Godly men are men of courage. And you need to understand that courage is not the absence of fear, but it's the ability to face fear and control yourself. Men never want to show that they appear in any way weak, and so they often deny fear. I'm not afraid of that. Yes, you are. I ain't afraid of that snake. Well, reach down there and touch him, bad boy. Trust me, the world that we live in is a scary place, and there's nothing wrong with admitting it. Courage is not the absence of fear: it's the willingness to face fear. And I've got good news. "God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of sound mind".
A godly man is not only a courageous man, but he's a source of counsel. One of the greatest plagues that we have in the world today is pacifistic men, who say to their sons and to their daughters, "You'll figure it out". No, they won't. You need to tell them. Oh, they'll figure it out. I want them to find their own way. The Proverbs says, "A child left to his own way will bring his parents shame". What sense does it make that we train our dogs, and we chain them up at night, and we don't train our kids, and we turn them loose in the street? "Train up a child". That means be a source of counsel. Be willing to say what needs to be said. We have a world that is in great need of wisdom, because people are in search of it and don't know where to find it. The Bible says in Proverbs 11, "Where there is no counsel, people fall. But in a multitude of counselors, there is safety".
Counsel is something that you, as a godly man, have a responsibility to offer to the next generation, because that's why God gave them to you, and that's why God gave you to them. Counsel can come from experience. Counsel can come from knowledge. Counsel can come straight from the Word of God, but counsel has to be shared. And it's a godly man's responsibility to share it with his next generation.
Godly men are concerned. This is the intimacy factor. Godly men are intimate people. They have a heart. There's a passion in their purpose. Look at Jesus. The Bible tells us that Jesus wept when he stood outside the tomb of Lazarus. Why did he weep for Lazarus? He knew he was going to bring Lazarus back from the grave. Jesus wept outside of the tomb of Lazarus, because his friends were hurting. And when they hurt, he felt it. He sympathized with them.
Godly men feel what other people feel. They weep with those who weep, and they rejoice with those who rejoice. Because the opposite of doing so is to be so self-centered that you're not aware of what others are going through. The sixth thing that a godly man does is he communicates. He doesn't dictate. What's the difference? Dictatorship is one way. I'll tell you how it's going to be. Communication is a two-way street of sending and receiving, hearing and repeating.
Communication requires focus. And every family needs a godly man to communicate. Husbands need to communicate with their wives. And fathers need to communicate with their children. Your children want you to communicate with them. When they ask questions, they expect answers. Don't be afraid to answer the question. And when you answer the question, tell them the cold-hard truth. Trust me, they probably know more than you do most of the time. Parents are so deceived. Oh, I don't want to break my kid's sense of innocence. Trust me, this world is going to shatter it if you don't turn on the light.
Now ladies, let's talk about your role. God looked down upon the man that he created, and he said, "It is not good for this brother to be alone". If I leave him here by himself, he's going to mess everything up. And so he brought a woman into creation that was a compliment to the man, not a control. The two are to walk side by side. And the world that we live in is saturated with the idea that it cannot be that way, there cannot be a companionship: there cannot be a compliment, one has to be over the other, and vice versa. This creates a great divide between being the woman that God created you to be or the one that the world wants to recruit you to be. But let's look at what God's word has to say about who he created and why he created her.
In Proverbs 31:12, it says that she does him... Who is "Him"? "Him" is her husband. "She does him good and not evil all the days of her life". Paul said to the church in Ephesians, "Wives, submit to your husbands as unto the Lord". The modern movement for women would say, "Well why on earth would a woman want to submit herself to a toxic man"? Because the Bible says, do it as unto the Lord. You don't do it because he deserves it. You do it because God asked you to do it. And when you do what God asks you to do, you qualify to receive the promises that God said you can have. So if you want God's blessings in your life, submit to your husbands as unto the Lord. You cannot claim a promise that you haven't obeyed in order to receive.
So let's compare biblical grace versus feminist control. The first comparison is this: grace compliments. Say that with me. Grace compliments. Feminist control criticizes. What's the difference? You need to understand, because you do not have a perfect husband, he will mess up sooner or later, and it's probably going to be sooner. When he messes up, the fastest way to get him back on track is not to criticize him, but to compliment him. You go, "Well, how does that work"? It's very easy. Men are like Labrador dogs. If you scratch their ears and you feed them, they will be loyal and faithful to you all the days of their life. You are such a good boy. You are a good boy. Compliment him. "You did a wonderful job. May I make a suggestion"?
And then when you make that suggestion, that's where you're restructuring and helping things turn out for the better. "You did a wonderful job watching the kids. May I make a suggestion? Don't feed them ice cream for lunch". Grace appreciates. Control compares. How does grace appreciate? Look at 1 Peter 3:6. It says, "Sarah obeyed Abraham". That word "Obey" means she appreciated Abraham, "Calling him Lord". Now this sounds like a simple-old verse, but let me tell you, it's profound when you understand the relationship between Sarah and Abraham. It says in this verse, Sarah appreciated Abraham, calling him Lord. Wow!
Mister, how would you behave if you came home and your wife said, "Yes, my Lord"? How did Abraham get that gig? Not because he deserved it, but because Sarah was obedient, not to Abraham, but to God. Sarah called him "Lord," not because of the outcome of his life. Sarah called him "Lord," because she believed that God had a purpose for his life. Think about it. Abraham goes to Sarah, and he says, "Sarah, I am following a God that no one has seen and only I can hear. And he has promised me a city whose builder and maker is him. And I'm going to be the father of many nations".
Now you would think that after a few years, Sarah would have changed her mind about things, because she's almost a hundred when she gets pregnant. Abraham, you promised me when we were kids, a city, and we're still living in a tent. You promised me children and I don't even have a son. You promised to love and cherish me, and twice you tried to give me away as your sister! Trust me, that's a problem. But the Bible doesn't say that she tried to control him by comparing him with everything that he didn't do.
The Bible says that she honored him. She appreciated him by calling him, "Lord". Every time it didn't go the way that he thought it should go, she said, I still believe in you, Abraham. I still love you, Abraham. I still think God's got good things for you, Abraham. I promise, Abraham, I'll be here because I know that some day the breakthrough's coming. You say, "Well, how do you know she talked to him like that"? Because when God gave Abraham the urge to have a child, he still wanted to have it with Sarah. If she had been nagging him for nine decades, he'd have said, "God, I'll do this with anybody but her". Feminine grace is consistent.
A godly woman is a consistent source of support, a consistent source of encouragement, a consistent source of counsel. Husbands, learn to value the counsel of your wives. God gave them perspective you don't have. If we did everything the way I see it, it would be a lot bigger mess. God gave my wife perspective that I couldn't even begin to fathom. She sees things differently. I'm always out in tomorrow. She's like, "We've got to deal with today". This is called "Compliment". It's a source of counsel. It's a source of encouragement. Don't resent it. Thank God for it.
A godly woman is a consistent source of counsel. A controlling woman fluctuates. She's not consistent. She's got the attitude of give me what I want or else. Grace nurtures. Control complains. When you realize how blessed you are to have what you have, you'll give God thanks that your kids are healthy enough to dirty the house, and they're healthy enough to eat the food that's in the fridge, and they're healthy enough to get dirt on the clothes as they go outside and run and play. And every day that you do it, you'll say, "God, thank you, because I don't deserve it. But you gave it to me anyway".
Grace follows out of love. Control judges the outcome. What do I mean by following out of love? You consider the motive, and you honor that instead of the outcome. Because ladies, I'm going to tell you again, your husband will mess up. It's what we do. And when we do, if you look at the motive of what we were trying to do, much more than what we accomplished, everything will be fine. Because if he loves you, his motive is going to be for you and not against you even if he doesn't do it perfectly. It's amazing to me how when two people are dating, nothing they do irritates each other.
You can pick wildflowers on the roadside, and she'd go, "Oh, a bouquet". You're dating her: you see her walk in the room, you go, "Oh, here she comes". You get married, you go, "Oh, here she comes". What changed? The grace factor. One judges motive. The other looks at outcome. Feminine grace always considers the motive. Control judges the outcome. Why? Because if it's not the way I want it, like I want it, when I want it, there's going to be trouble. Grace is distinguished in value. Grace stands out above the rest, because the Bible says in Proverbs 31:30, "A woman who fears the Lord is to be praised".
Control always wants to dominate. Why? Because they're living underneath the curse in Genesis. People think this battle of the sexes thing started in the 60's. You're wrong. It started in Genesis 3:16. Sin has always been a separator. And when Adam and Eve brought sin into the world, it not only separated them from eden, but it separated them from one another. Because God showed up, and he said to eve, "Because you have heeded the voice of the serpent and eaten the fruit... Your desire will always be towards your husband, but he shall rule over you".
That's where the battle of the sexes began. Now, I've heard some educated seminarians try and teach this from the sexual consideration. Oh, the Lord was talking about sex drive: that a woman would always desire her husband. What planet did you fall off of? But I have had them walk through the door where the problem is she wants control and he won't lead. Now why? Because you're trying to do it your way instead of God's way. And today, I want to give you the opportunity to get back in alignment with God's way, because if you do, God will pour out blessings upon your family, upon your children, and upon your children's children. But you have to make that choice today.