Joyce Meyer - Ask Us Anything - Part 2
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Ginger Stache: Hi friends. Thanks for being with us on, "Enjoying Everyday Life". Today we conclude our ask us anything discussion from a talk it out podcast. You guys had great questions and it gave us the opportunity to talk about so many great things. Joyce gives some wonderful insights into many issues that were weighing on the minds of some of you, including fear and how to continue to find your purpose no matter your age or season of life. And of course, Erin and I also share our perspectives as well. It's great fun and it's insightful. So, I hope that you find this discussion helpful and encouraging.
Ginger Stache: All right, here's an interesting question. "How do you balance having hope and faith that God can intervene versus just being delusional"? And that's how they said it, but it's a really good question. Like, how do you balance?
Erin Cluley: Can I ask a question with a question? What that question says, how does that work when it's in terms of healing? Because you wanna have faith and hope that God is gonna heal your loved one or whatever the circumstance is, but to not be... what was the word she used?
Ginger Stache: Delusional.
Erin Cluley: Delusional. I just think that's a trap we can sometimes get ourselves into. What does that look like?
Joyce Meyer: Well, I think that you always believe. Jesus said, "Who will I find in faith when I come back"? And I believe that everybody is healed, but I think some people get it when they cross over to the other side. And I just reread something again the other day that just keeps coming back to me. God always answers prayer, but sometimes he says, "No". And he knows what he's doing, we can trust him. And just because we want somebody to stay here doesn't necessarily mean that it's not their time to go.
Erin Cluley: Which then means your faith and your hope is not delusional.
Ginger Stache: Right.
Joyce Meyer: No.
Erin Cluley: Just not the...
Joyce Meyer: But I would always believe, I would believe until the last second. Because that's what God tells us to do.
Ginger Stache: So, the question is, what is your faith in?
Joyce Meyer: Yes, right.
Ginger Stache: Is your faith in getting what I want?
Joyce Meyer: Or is it in God?
Ginger Stache: Or is it...
Joyce Meyer: That's very good.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, yeah.
Erin Cluley: That was really good. You can write that down. Joyce and I.
Joyce Meyer: Best answer of the day.
Erin Cluley: Yeah. Should we stop?
Ginger Stache: That won't last long. We have so many good ones. Okay, this is big for everybody. "How do you handle fear? The fear of everything going wrong, anywhere, at any time, the world seems out of control. So, how do I handle fear"?
Erin Cluley: I just don't think about it. That's not very helpful.
Ginger Stache: So, denial is the way to go.
Erin Cluley: Yep.
Joyce Meyer: Denial works, it's just not.
Erin Cluley: Just pretend it's not happening. No, I think like the fear of what's happening in the world, to me, I think I can't control it anyways, so, I'm not gonna give myself the time to worry about it.
Joyce Meyer: Yeah, I agree with that. Is that the kind of fear you were talking about? Fear of what's happening in the world?
Ginger Stache: She mentions that, but also, the fear of everything going wrong. So, I think with something like this, anywhere, anytime, I think a lot of it is being out of control, right? I can't control what might happen to one of my children. I can't control what's happening in the world.
Joyce Meyer: You have to not take a false sense of responsibility. Now, you know, some fears you have to confront: you do it afraid. But the kind of fear she seems to be asking about, I think is the kind where you have to realize, like you said, you're not in control, you can't, you know, you trust God, that he'll make it work out.
Ginger Stache: What I found, too, is when you trust God and your worst fear still seems to come true, is very difficult. And working through that, learning that even in that, you can still trust God, because there's so much more past what we just experienced in this moment. And living through fear, I think, teaches you more than anything else of how to deal with fear. Because you can't live in fear, but God can help you through fear.
Joyce Meyer: So many things you fear don't happen.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, right.
Joyce Meyer: They say that fear, F-E-A-R, means False Evidence Appearing Real. The devil always shows you the worst-case scenario. And sometimes, it happens, but most of the time it doesn't.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, yeah. "How do you forgive someone that has passed away"? Or do you even have to?
Joyce Meyer: Well, yeah, I think sometimes for you, you need to. I mean, I've heard people say they went to the person's grave site, told 'em they forgave 'em. I think verbalizing it is good, you know. "Father, I forgive you".
Ginger Stache: Yeah, it is more for you, right?
Joyce Meyer: Yeah, it is.
Erin Cluley: Absolutely.
Joyce Meyer: It's more for you. Forgiveness actually is always for you.
Ginger Stache: And it's not based on because they're no longer here: they're not gonna ask for forgiveness.
Joyce Meyer: No, and forgiveness is always for you because it doesn't... you forgiving the other person doesn't really help them. It helps you. They still have to deal with God about what they did. But you don't need to keep drinking the poison.
Erin Cluley: 'cause even if they were still here, you still may not get what you want from them.
Joyce Meyer: Right.
Ginger Stache: Exactly.
Erin Cluley: Regardless of where they are. Yeah, it really is about what you need to do to let go.
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Erin Cluley: That's hard though.
Ginger Stache: It is, it's really hard.
Erin Cluley: That's a hard one.
Ginger Stache: But it sets you free.
Erin Cluley: Absolutely.
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: It does. Forgiveness is so important. I think it's one of the most important things in the world today that needs to take place. There's so many people that are angry. And we need to forgive and realize that we can trust God.
Erin Cluley: Yeah.
Ginger Stache: I love this question. This says, "Joyce..."
Erin Cluley: I love it already, too.
Ginger Stache: "Where are the strong-character, single, godly men?"!
Erin Cluley: Oooh, good one!
Ginger Stache: Question mark, exclamation point, question mark, exclamation point.
Erin Cluley: Where are they, Joyce?
Joyce Meyer: "Where are they, Joyce"? Well, I've got one at home that I've had for 56...
Ginger Stache: But he's not single.
Joyce Meyer: No, that's right, he's not single. Where are they? Uh...Well...?
Ginger Stache: I understand people asking the question. I'm sure it's a hard...
Erin Cluley: That's a great question.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, it's a hard situation.
Joyce Meyer: I think it has to be a divine intervention. I think God has to bring 'em on. They're not in the bar, I don't think. I would hope that church would be the best place to find one. But...
Ginger Stache: There's some losers there, too.
Joyce Meyer: But there's losers there, too. But I think that you need to put yourself in a position where you might meet someone like get in a singles group. You know, don't just go sit in church and think because you're sitting there, Mr. Wonderful is gonna to walk up and say, "Will you marry me"? But I understand the question. It's hard to wait, but they're out there. You just gotta trust God for... I call it a divine connection. One thing I will tell you not to do because I did it, don't get desperate and marry somebody just because you're afraid you'll never have anybody because I did that when I was 18, and of course, it didn't work, and he cheated on me and it was just a nightmare.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, that's good encouragement, though.
Erin Cluley: Can I ask another one?
Ginger Stache: Absolutely, you can.
Erin Cluley: This is not on your list, but I think, I bet women would love to know this. What is a female's responsibility to start dating? Because I think there's a lot of conversation in the culture today about whether it's the woman's job to wait to be pursued by a man, or is it okay for a woman to make the first move and talk to a guy?
Joyce Meyer: Well, I come from the culture where you waited for the guy, so.
Erin Cluley: Would you change your view now, or would you stand by that?
Joyce Meyer: I don't know.
Erin Cluley: Okay, that's fair.
Joyce Meyer: I don't know.
Ginger Stache: What do you think?
Erin Cluley: I don't know either. I do, I take that back, I know. I know what I think. I think a lot of that goes to confidence. Because I think, I remember when I was dating, it was so much easier to think, "Let them just come to me. That's gotta be the right answer because then I don't have to put myself out there and feel like I might be rejected". And so, I think from my vantage point, if we can be confident enough of who we are in Christ and that we, as women, have a lot to offer, and whoever this man is, it's his loss if he doesn't wanna talk to me. But it's about the confidence of who you are in Jesus. And I just want girls to know that they are, be who you are, be confident in who Jesus made you to be.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, and realize your value.
Erin Cluley: Yes.
Joyce Meyer: Right.
Ginger Stache: Like don't accept being treated less than God wants you to be treated.
Joyce Meyer: Right, yeah.
Ginger Stache: And there are good men out there.
Erin Cluley: There are.
Ginger Stache: It might take a while and I don't know where to find them. I wish I had an answer for everyone, but don't sell yourself short like Joyce said.
Joyce Meyer: That's right.
Erin Cluley: Yeah, that's good.
Ginger Stache: "How can I be more confident in my prayer"? So, is there anything about praying that you would encourage somebody with?
Joyce Meyer: Well, I think the answer to that, for me, is to remember other prayers that God has answered for me.
Erin Cluley: Yeah, that's great.
Joyce Meyer: I don't think we remember enough. I think we forget what we should remember and we remember what we should forget. You know, there's so many, David, when he was depressed, he remembered a time when he had led the band into Israel and they were bringing the ark in. And when he was facing Goliath, he remembered the lion and the bear that he had already killed and that gave him confidence. So, I think remembering times when God has done other things for you.
Ginger Stache: This is an unusual question. I'm just gonna throw it out because we may or may not have an answer, I don't know. "This might sound strange, but should we be praying for satan to be saved one day"? Because we...
Erin Cluley: That's a great question.
Ginger Stache: We pray, you know. We pray for people to come to know the Lord.
Erin Cluley: Right.
Ginger Stache: Satan's not exactly people.
Joyce Meyer: No.
Ginger Stache: What do you think?
Joyce Meyer: We should not pray for satan to be saved. It's already a lost cause. It's already been stated, the book's been written, been closed, he's done.
Ginger Stache: We know how the story ends.
Joyce Meyer: We know how the story ends, so, no.
Ginger Stache: Well, that's kind of nice that it's one thing off our prayer list.
Joyce Meyer: Yeah.
Erin Cluley: It's so true, check.
Ginger Stache: Okay, Joyce, this is a great one for you. "My mom has just turned 73 and she's a spunky one, not ready to shut down..."
Joyce Meyer: Why is it good for me? I'm only 30.
Ginger Stache: That's exactly why. This is for your future. "How do I encourage her in fulfilling her purpose at this time? She often wonders if her purpose is finished, but I'm encouraged to see all that Joyce is still doing and going strong".
Joyce Meyer: Well, I heard Dick Van Dyke say something and he's in his '90s and I thought it was really, really good. He said, "When you get older, in order to be happy, you need two things. You need someone to love, and you need a purpose". And so, I would say to her, even, I think a great purpose is always doing something for someone else. So, even if she volunteered at like, I just heard a story recently about a guy's mom who was just depressed all the time and miserable and it makes you cranky when you're depressed and hard to get along with. And she started volunteering at a place that helps veterans and they get clothing donations and food donations. And she's just involved there now in separating those and helps manage the sales they have. And she just is absolutely loving it. So, you need to be with people and doing something that you feel like you're contributing.
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Erin Cluley: That's great.
Ginger Stache: And there is always purpose, isn't there?
Joyce Meyer: Right, everybody. There's always somebody that needs your help.
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Erin Cluley: You know, we had a lot of conversations about this when my grandma was 94, yeah, just about 95. She passed a couple of months ago, but she couldn't do anything. I mean, she had declined so much. And so, I remember talking to my mom, like, "What do you think God's purpose for her is still here"? I mean, he's left her here for something, so. But that woman, up until right before she passed away, she couldn't go anywhere, but she spent all day in her room and she had all these prayer journals, just all pages after pages of who she's praying for. She would write down how she heard God answer her.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, what a wonderful legacy.
Erin Cluley: Yeah, and so I thought she can't go anywhere. There's not a lot of people she's communicating with, but man, I know I was prayed for every day until she passed. What better purpose?
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: It's very good. You can always find a purpose if you want to.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, that's beautiful. Okay, next question. "How can I turn to God through PTSD or a panic attack instead of like my eating disorder or other places where we tend to turn in times of panic"? They tend to be kind of our knee jerk safety, but they don't work.
Joyce Meyer: So, I wanna make sure I'm understanding the question. If somebody is having a panic attack...
Ginger Stache: Or they're dealing with trauma.
Joyce Meyer: They would normally run to food.
Ginger Stache: Right.
Joyce Meyer: Well, one story I remember, and this is not to tout my book, but the book that I wrote, "Battlefield of the mind," one girl told me that she was bulimic. And she said, "I started, when I wanted to make myself throw up. I would bow down in front of the toilet and read your book". Because she had to get a new mindset. She had to believe that she could overcome that. And so, she realized that satan was putting those thoughts in her head that she had to go make herself throw up. And she was set completely free. So, whether it's a Bible or something else you wanna use, I'm not saying it has to be my book, but I think you have to turn...
Ginger Stache: Something full of God's word though.
Joyce Meyer: I think you have to turn to the word: turn to God.
Ginger Stache: You've talked a lot about how replacing a bad habit with a positive habit is a great way to change the results of what you're getting in your life.
Joyce Meyer: Yeah, maybe somebody's having something like that. Maybe it's just, I know one person who, when they get angry, they found if they'll just get away from the situation and go for a walk, they can get back some balance and some common sense.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, good, make a change. Okay. I'm gonna ask one more question.
Erin Cluley: Okay.
Ginger Stache: This is the last one. "When you've prayed and fasted and asked other Christians, you trust to pray, and you've not seen an answer for months and nothing has changed, what is there left to do besides trusting God and doing good"? Now, the thing about this is they've obviously heard what the word says, they've heard Joyce maybe talking about trust God and do good and how important it is.
Joyce Meyer: Well, the thing that comes to me is there's nothing left to do unless, maybe I'm wrong, but maybe God has told this person to step out in something and they're not being obedient. Because I have found, for me, that a lot of times when I pray, God doesn't just clear the situation up for me, he shows me something that I need to do. You know, like, I was having really bad stomach problems, one time, and he showed me, it was the mints I was eating. They had something in them that, it was a sugar free, so they had something in them that was bothering my stomach. You know, little things like that are, so, I don't know. You know, but, I mean...
Ginger Stache: So, ask God the questions, "Show me".
Joyce Meyer: "Is there something that you want me to do"? And if not, then you... See, there is no end to prayer. There's no end to trust, there's no end to prayer. Jesus said, "Who will I find in faith when I return"? We're not to faint in prayer, we're to continue to pray. And so, you never... I prayed for my dad on and off for 30 years before he finally gave his life to the Lord. So, when do you say, "God's not gonna answer my prayer"?
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: And I think also, you might consider, at that point, am I asking for something that is out of God's will?
Ginger Stache: Well, I also think, and I can relate to what they're saying, "What else can I do"?
Joyce Meyer: Sure, yeah.
Ginger Stache: "Besides trust God and do good".
Joyce Meyer: That's our biggest problem. "What can I do, what can I do, what can I do"?
Ginger Stache: Exactly, and sometimes there isn't beside...
Joyce Meyer: There's nothing, no.
Ginger Stache: But trusting God and doing good in the meantime, helping others, doing what you know God is asking you to do may take a long time, but it doesn't mean that God's not working in the situation.
Joyce Meyer: One writer that I absolutely love and have gotten a lot out of, calls it "Acceptance with joy".
Ginger Stache: Oh, that's hard.
Erin Cluley: You said like it was great, but think about what you just said to us.
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: But, I mean, it's like, "This is the way it is right now, and I'm gonna accept it and I'm gonna be joyful". The Bible says, "Serve the Lord with gladness". And it tells us that "Godliness with contentment is of great gain". And so, Paul said he was content, whether he was abased or abounding. So, we could translate that into saying, "I'm content, whether I'm getting what I want or whether I'm not".
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Erin Cluley: That's great.
Ginger Stache: Which boy, that's a God thing, isn't it? To really be content, whether things are going really well or fairly badly, that is definitely God's intervening with our attitudes and our emotions, and not really planting ourself on how we're feeling every day.
Joyce Meyer: If it's okay, I'd like to end the show with one comment. Now, I'm 81, and I've been serving God for 48 years. And so, obviously, I've learned a lot during that period of time, tried everything imaginable to get what I wanted, tried, failed, all these questions, I understand every one of these questions. I relate to 'em. Don't think any of 'em are foolish. Ask 'em, we're glad to answer. But the bottom line of it all comes down to trusting God. If you trust God... I'm rereading a book on disappointment with God that I read years ago, and reading it now, I think, you know, "I'm never disappointed in you because if I didn't get it, then I wasn't supposed to get it".
Erin Cluley: Yep.
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: You know, it wasn't, or it's not time. You know, so trust. You know, I think that's really the end result of what God is working us toward in every area of life is, "Do you trust me"?
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: "Do you really believe that I love you enough that I will do the best thing for you"?
Erin Cluley: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: And, "I love you".
Ginger Stache: Yeah, well, what a great way to end not only this program, but you realize it's been like five years that we've been doing, talk it out, now.
Joyce Meyer: Really? Wow.
Erin Cluley: Do you know, I know that because I brought a present for you both today to celebrate our five year anniversary?
Ginger Stache: Aww.
Erin Cluley: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: Aww, well, thank you.
Ginger Stache: That was so nice.
Erin Cluley: You have to open them right now. I look forward to your reactions when you open it.
Ginger Stache: Look at the cute, little bags.
Joyce Meyer: I just said my love language is gifts.
Erin Cluley: Yeah, wait till you open it, though.
Ginger Stache: "Wait till you open it, though".
Erin Cluley: Because wood is the five-year anniversary.
Ginger Stache: "Happy five-year anniversary," piece of wood.
Erin Cluley: I gave you a piece of wood.
Ginger Stache: "Love, Erin".
Joyce Meyer: That is so wonderful, Erin.
Ginger Stache: Thank you!
Erin Cluley: I know, I thought that would speak to your heart, right there.
Joyce Meyer: Thank you, I really wanted a block of wood.
Erin Cluley: I know, it's nicely shaved.
Joyce Meyer: I was believing for a block of wood.
Erin Cluley: I know. Well, now, you got it.
Ginger Stache: I will cherish it: I will use it as a doorstop.
Erin Cluley: Yep, the variety of things you can do with that.
Joyce Meyer: I thought I might use it to prop something up on.
Erin Cluley: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: You know what I could do with that?
Erin Cluley: What?
Joyce Meyer: I could set my coffee on that every morning so it doesn't make a stain.
Ginger Stache: That's such a good idea.
Erin Cluley: That's perfect.
Ginger Stache: That's a very good idea.
Erin Cluley: You're welcome.
Joyce Meyer: My coffee that's made out of my Nespresso pot.
Erin Cluley: With two teaspoons of heavy cream.
Joyce Meyer: Two teaspoons, heavy cream.
Erin Cluley: I think it sounds great.
Joyce Meyer: Thank you.
Ginger Stache: Well, thank you, Erin.
Erin Cluley: Oh, you're welcome. That was just silly.