Joyce Meyer - Take Your Life Back - Part 1
Hi everyone, how would you like to keep a youthful point of view at every age? Today I'm telling you, you're gonna be glad you're here, it's such good stuff. You see, no matter how young or old we are, this is the perfect time to have an attitude adjustment about aging. We can embrace each season of our life with God's help. And no matter our age, she always has good stuff for us. So today, from our talk it out podcast, Joyce is going to share some practical steps for aging well. We're learning about aging without growing old.
Ginger Stache: This is Joyce Meyer's Talk It Out podcast, where Joyce teaches the Word of God in her practical no-nonsense way, and my friends and I talk about the real stuff of living it and we don't hold anything back. I'm Ginger Stache, with Jai, and Erin Cluley, three friends who are all in very different places in life, but we understand the importance of having honest, loving women around you. And when we need a little help, miss Joyce is here, just like she is today, to answer our questions for you. So, consider yourself one of us. Come on in here, and let's talk it out. Joyce, thank you for being here.
Joyce Meyer: Oh, you're welcome. You're welcome.
Ginger Stache: Well, Joyce has a new and it's called, "How to age without getting old". This is good stuff. And you might think by the title that this is for people who are a little bit more advanced in years, but it's not. This book is talking about aging well, and doing now, what matters later. And Erin, you just said, this is a book for your age group too, right, for everybody.
Erin Cluley: It's so good, cuz as I was reading it, I relate to you and your work ethic, and drive to get stuff done. And so, I can see if I don't pay attention now, I can very well end up in a, not the place I wanna be. So, oh, it's so good.
Joyce Meyer: That's one of the main things I wanna get across to people is that it's not just for somebody that's 70, or 65, or who's retired. But if I would have had this book and would have paid attention to it when I was, let's say 40, I could have skipped over a lot of physical trauma that I went through because I didn't have anybody teaching me, or telling me. I mean, the whole thing was do as much as you can, you know? And I would talk to other ministers, "I haven't had a day of vacation in 12 years," and I'd think that was really spiritual. Now, I realize, you know, that was just dumb, you know?
Ginger Stache: Let's talk to our 20-year-old friends. I remember what I was like in college. And you know, just that pace and that running, or 30-year-old friends who are raising their kids and can't keep up with everything. We're gonna talk also about just taking your life back. Giving God the opportunity to do what he needs to do in our life, instead of our life taking over us. And when that happens, our years will be better throughout.
Joyce Meyer: I would say most people today, let their lives run them.
Erin Cluley: Yeah, absolutely.
Jai Williams: 100%.
Joyce Meyer: A lot of, you know, like demands, and everybody wants something: and you think you gotta keep everybody happy. You know, there's expectations from everywhere. And you know, it takes a lot of courage to really follow what you believe is the leadership of the Holy Spirit and be able to say, "No," when you really feel like that you need to say, no. Now, I know we're all at different ages, so, hope you're okay with this on-air, but how old are you erin?
Erin Cluley: I believe I'm 34.
Joyce Meyer: You believe you are?
Erin Cluley: Yeah, sometimes, I can't remember if I'm 34 or 35. But I'm pretty sure I'm 34.
Erin Cluley: Today, I'm 34.
Joyce Meyer: And Jai, how 'bout you?
Jai Williams: I am happily 39, and I'm so excited about turning 40 this year.
Joyce Meyer: And what about you, Ginger?
Ginger Stache: I'm 57.
Joyce Meyer: And I'm 77. Ginger, have you felt changes in your body say in the last decade?
Ginger Stache: Ugh eck!
Erin Cluley: So, no?
Ginger Stache: How much time do we have? Yes.
Joyce Meyer: Well, I think we need to talk about that.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, absolutely. Nothing's in the same place that used to be. In honor, of this topic today, I wore a one-piece suit, just to prove that I can still handle it. Because we've talked about the fact that as you age, that your body's just different. And it takes a while to get a jumpsuit off. And so, when you think that there is a possibility that you're gonna have to take a potty break, I have to plan a good half-hour out, when I'm wearing a get-up like this. So, it's just one of those things. So, many things that change physically in your life.
Joyce Meyer: Yeah, the way we look changes, but also, what about like, energy levels. And I know, you've shared with me that, like when you go on foreign mission trips now, that's different for you than, what'd you say? The heat bothers you more. Tell us about that.
Ginger Stache: Yeah, well, when we're on these trips in other countries, we have a short amount of time, and a lot of things to do, you know, a lot of people that we want to get to and help, so, we are just running. And we try to get as much done as we can. So, quite often, we're just eating beef jerky out of our bags, things like that. And I would thrive on that. I love that. Be long days, it's usually very hot where we go, not always. And I've never done well with the heat. So, now, as I've been getting older, I can tell a big difference. And I hate to even say this because I don't like to admit it, you know? We all want to say, "No, I'm good".
Joyce Meyer: You know, that was my problem. You know, I wanted to be, I think from being abused as a child, and my mother not being strong enough to do anything about it, I grew up really just, I didn't hate her, but I hated weakness. And I really disrespected weak people. It was like, "Oh, come on," you know? "Don't give me the, 'I can't do that, that's too hard'". You know? I've learned different now. That we all have different abilities, and you need to respect, you know, where people are at. But I was like that. It was like, you weren't gonna hear me say I couldn't do something. And so, I would push myself. And the thing that I'm wanting people to really understand is that, okay, only a fool thinks they can always do what they've always done. And so, what you could do when you were 30, and maybe even 40, now you're starting to feel it. So, that is your body, it's really wisdom telling you, "You have to make a change now".
Ginger Stache: And I don't like it.
Joyce Meyer: No, you don't like it. But the thing is too, is when we need to change, other people don't like it.
Ginger Stache: Oh, that's true. That's a really good point.
Joyce Meyer: See, when I got to the point where I felt like I was needing to make some changes here, and I mean, I think you can verify this, everybody thought, well, you know, "No, you have to do that. You know, it's not going to be as good if you don't do it. You know, that's not gonna be as good. This isn't gonna be as good". And so, I really felt like I was in a trap, you know, like, "Am I ever gonna get to rest or am I always gonna have to do everything"? And we found out that it's not about us, it's about where God puts his grace and where God puts his anointing. And so, God doesn't want you to kill yourself. And so, like these trips. You'll either stay gone more days, so you can have rest, or you'll take somebody with you that can do part of it, or eventually, we may have to send somebody else. You know, you can't, you just cannot, and I think the younger that people are when they get that through their head, the easier it's going to be to make those changes.
Erin Cluley: I feel as a young-ish person that the weight is on me, that if I don't do it, this won't happen at all. And I am not the end of the world, here. I'm not the end-all be-all of whatever this thing is. I bet God could probably fill in that gap. But in my mind, "If I don't do it, then nobody else is gonna do it".
Jai Williams: Yeah, and I feel the same way. And I remember when I first got married at twenty and I had my daughter, I remember my body changing, right? Like, I remember, I was proudly five foot one and a cheerleader. I was just, that was who I was all through college even. And then, after having my daughter and a C-section, and my whole body just like... err... and that's what triggered, honestly, my first bout of depression, you know? And then, I remember just going through that, not being happy that my body wasn't the same, and really didn't do anything about it because I was just grieving who I was. And then I remember in my earlier 30's, I ended up having a hysterectomy. And that hysterectomy triggered me into like pre-menopausal...
Joyce Meyer: Mmm... That's fun.
Jai Williams: Yeah, like symptoms. And so, then all of a sudden, my hormones are out of whack, my body, like you know, sweating, and cold, and not hungry.
Ginger Stache: Tell me about it girl!
Jai Williams: It was just a lot of things. And so, when I was reading the book, I was just super grateful for, you know, for you sharing all of your wins and things that you've learned, you know? Cuz you say all this, this statement of, "If I could tell my younger self, you know, what I know now". And that's honestly, what I believe this book is. It's you telling our younger selves what to do and not to do, and how to process. I feel like I wasted a lot of time grieving who I was versus saying, "Who can I be right now, and not having to do it all right now"?
Joyce Meyer: When you have to make a change, that's not a bad thing. It's wise to make that change. You know, first of all, our bodies are the home of God, they're the temple of the Holy Spirit. And it's really disrespectful to God, if you wanna look at it just from a spiritual standpoint. It's really disrespectful to God to just run yourself into the ground to where, you know, you just are pushing yourself all the time.
Ginger Stache: That's quite a statement because we think we're doing it for God.
Joyce Meyer: But you gotta remember Epaphroditus in the Bible, I mean, he got sick from working too hard in the ministry. And so, even though, and that was me, "Well, I'm doing it for God". But you're not really, not if you're disobeying him in the process. And people always wanna know, "Well, how can I hear from God? How can I hear from God"? Well, listening to your own body is one of the ways that you can hear from God because we always think, you know, well, "I'll be the one that will get by with it. I know I probably shouldn't, but I'll be the one that will get by with it".
Jai Williams: I used to be the type that was like, "Oh, man, I just gotta keep going, gotta keep moving. Gotta keep, it's for Jesus! The people need Jesus"! As if I was only one that can give 'em Jesus. "I'm the only one that can bring the presence of Jesus". No, that's not true. So, dispelling that and giving myself to the time to say, "I need to rest. I need to heal. I need to like, get poured into for a while," versus just continuing, because I've always done that, so.
Joyce Meyer: And to be honest, I'll put it on myself, a lot of it's our own pride.
Erin Cluley: Oh, amen.
Ginger Stache: That's really true.
Joyce Meyer: It's like, "Nobody can do it as good as I can". "If I don't do this, it's not gonna get done". "I don't wanna say, 'I can't,' because then I'm going to look weak".
Erin Cluley: "Cause I can do whatever I need to do".
Joyce Meyer: Yeah, and I can do what, and you know, we can, that scripture Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ," we can't take that out of balance. We can only do through Christ what he gives us to do. Not just anything we wanna do, but what he wants us to do.
Erin Cluley: I love in your book when you talked about, what some of how you've learned this recently when the doctor told you to rest and you said, "What do I do while I'm resting"?
Joyce Meyer: That was the first thing I said.
Erin Cluley: I've had that thought too. "What do you mean"?
Joyce Meyer: Yeah, he told me he wanted me to rest eighteen months and I thought the man had lost his mind. I'm like, "Eighteen months? What does one do while they rest for eighteen months"? And it was almost like frightening to me to think.
Ginger Stache: Well, let's talk about that for a minute because there were things that you began to deal with physically that were significant, and you had to make some big changes.
Joyce Meyer: Oh, I got sick, very sick.
Ginger Stache: So, it really came as a surprise and yet it also came from a long time of pushing very hard. I mean, you've accomplished amazing things and you've been running and serving the Lord for a long, long time. And how do you explain it? Finally your body was just kind of at point where it was gonna make you rest?
Joyce Meyer: Well, yeah. I mean, if you think about my life, okay, the first 15 years of my life, or from age three to about eighteen, I was abused sexually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and yes, God heals us from that, but it still does take a toll on you. And so, already, by the time I was eighteen, I was having colitis and colon problems, and you know, issues like that. And then, I remember even in my twenties going to the doctor, trying to tell 'em how I felt. And they'd always tell me it was stress, and that would just make me so mad. Because my mother had, had a nervous breakdown, so I thought that stress meant you couldn't handle your life and nobody's going to tell me that I couldn't handle life. And I thought, "You are giving me stress. I don't have stress. You are giving me stress, telling me that I have stress". And I didn't want to hear any other diagnosis. And then, I had a hysterectomy when I was in my real early forties because I was bleeding all the time. And that was fine. I was taking hormones, all was well, control the hot flashes, the you know, feeling like going crazy thing. Then I had breast cancer, and it was an estrogen-dependent tumor. And so, then I couldn't take any hormones. And I thought that was going to kill me because I was working so hard. I mean, I didn't go on TV until I was 50. I didn't start the ministry till I was 42. So, I mean, I didn't go on TV till I was 50.
Erin Cluley: Amazing.
Joyce Meyer: You know, it's hard work to travel. And I would do all these conferences, and I would do everything in the conference. I mean, there was a time when I was doing 36 conferences a year. And I mean, there were like five sessions, some of them. And I would take every speaking engagement I could take. I mean, when I look back, I just think, "You know, that was just really stupid". But I was strong. God did make me strong, and he did want me doing most of what I did. The thing is, it doesn't take a lot of tweaking your life. It's not like you gotta stop everything you're doing. It doesn't take a lot of tweaking to get to where God wants you to be. He's not asking you not to be fruitful and not to do anything. He's just asking you to take those times to recover.
Erin Cluley: What would you say, now looking back? What would you tell yourself then, now that you know what you know now? What would you do differently? Because what's interesting to me is you were building something and so there is so much hard work that goes into it. And you started from nothing to what God has done. So, there's a lot of work, but how do you balance that, like what would you do differently?
Joyce Meyer: I think the things that I would do differently is, I would really look at what I was doing that was bearing fruit, and what I was doing that I was just doing that really wasn't bearing any fruit. And that's really what I try, then eventually, I even had to get to the point where I had to look at, "Okay, what was bearing fruit for our ministry". You know, everybody wants a favor, and I don't ever wanna be the kind of person that won't do a favor for somebody. Everything that I do doesn't have to have a monetary value for me. I mean, there's many times when I go and speak and tell people I don't even want an offering. That's a way that I can give. But I finally learned that if I'm constantly doing favors for other people, then that's bearing fruit for them, but then I still have everything that I have to do to make this work. And so, I really would have said, "No," to more things a lot sooner than what I did. But I really just didn't wanna say no to anything.
Erin Cluley: I think there's such a mentality in our culture to push till you can push no more. And you just fight, and you grind, and you do everything you can because, especially as women, we're strong, and capable, and independent, and we can do anything we need to. Yes, but also, there's a price to pay if you do all of that.
Joyce Meyer: Well, and when I started the ministry, I had a baby and three teenagers.
Erin Cluley: I just don't even know how you did it.
Joyce Meyer: A baby and three teenagers. Let me say that again, a baby and three teenagers.
Erin Cluley: So, you didn't sleep either.
Joyce Meyer: Well, you know, actually, I did sleep decently. But I probably only slept six hours a night. But I mean, I just never, I never quit. I mean, I worked from the time I opened my eyes in the morning until 10, 11 o'clock at night. And it was non-stop all the time. And then, I would do dumb stuff like come back from a conference and go to the shopping mall, and shop the rest of the day. And then go out the next day and shop. You know, I just didn't know how to be still. I wanted to be doing something all the time. And you know, when I got real sick, December of 2017, I can say it was a surprise, but really if I look back, and if I'm honest I had been having different things that I was ignoring. So, I just wonder, you know, like talking to our audience, what kind of things are you ignoring that your body is trying to tell you?
Ginger Stache: That's a great question, yeah.
Joyce Meyer: Because we do ignore things like, "I don't wanna go to the doctor". You know, some people say, like, "I don't like doctors. I'm not going to the doctor".
Ginger Stache: Yeah.
Joyce Meyer: Well, you know, good for you, but your body is trying to tell you something.
Erin Cluley: Yeah, absolutely.
Ginger Stache: And your body told you, under no uncertain terms, right, I mean, you just had to make major changes. So, for that young mom who's watching right now, right, she's building a family, maybe she's working, maybe she's trying to serve others along the way: how does she balance that aspect of I wanna do what God wants me to do and not just everything that comes down the pike? How does she kind of take her life back?
Joyce Meyer: Well, different people have different means of being able to do things. But let's just say that you're a mom, and you can afford it, how 'bout getting a babysitter once a week for you, even if it's for you to go have four hours by yourself to just relax, to do something you like, to get a pedicure, get a massage, take a walk, sit in the park, just be quiet? And to also, realize that...
Ginger Stache: I can just hear everyone at home, like, "Yes"! Playing it over and over, "Honey, come listen to this"!
Jai Williams: "Listen to what Joyce just said"!
Joyce Meyer: And you know, there may be people that can't afford that, but maybe you know another mom that you could trade with.
Ginger Stache: Oh, yeah, that's great.
Joyce Meyer: You know, maybe you know, "I'll do this for you this week, if you'll do this for me". One of the things I've found out is if you want to do something bad enough, you will find a way to do it. And a lot of times we use that as an excuse. And I know that from working out. I mean for years, I just said there's no way I can work out. I mean, Dave kept trying to get me to work out regularly, you know, with weights. And I was just like, "I don't have any time for that". And so then, I would decide to try, and me, I'm gonna get in shape in two days. And so, I'm doing way too much and I hurt myself. And then I say, "See, I can't do this. Every time I try, I hurt myself". And then, finally, I looked at myself, like you said, one day and everything that used to be up here was down here somewhere. And God just had to speak to me. And he said, "You're not gonna be around for the last third of your journey if you don't do this". And so, people have to get some kind of exercise, they have to rest, they have to sleep. They need to drink water and not some sugary drink all the time. I'm not saying you can't eat sugar, but you can't live on candy bars and potato chips. And you know, there are changes that people need to make. But I thought there was no way that I could work out, and now, for 16 years, I've been working out three days a week. So, let me just say again, if you really want to do something bad enough, you can find a way to do it.
Ginger Stache: So, that means you started working out when you were in your sixties.
Joyce Meyer: Sixty-two.
Ginger Stache: That's so encouraging.
Jai Williams: It's never too late.
Ginger Stache: Exactly, we can start it at any time, and it will make a difference.