Joel Osteen - Kiss It Goodbye
I want to talk to you today about "Kiss it goodbye". There's a lady in the scripture, named Naomi. She left Bethlehem with her husband and two sons, because of a famine. They moved to the city of moab, they had plenty of food, life was good, until her husband unexpectedly died. She never dreamed she'd be a widow. 10 years later both of her grown sons passed away, and she was so discouraged, she decided to move back home to Bethlehem. She told her two daughters-in-law Ruth and Orpah, that they should move back to their hometowns as well, and start a new life. Ruth said, "No, Naomi, I'm staying with you. I'm going to Bethlehem to help take care of you". The other daughter-in-law Orpah took her advice and said she was going to leave and move back home.
You would think, Naomi would have been a little sour and thought: after all I've done for you, Orpah, you're going to leave me now, at my lowest moment? You can go get remarried, you can find another job, I'm an old lady. Who's going to take care of me? She could have felt betrayed, insulted. Instead, the scripture says, Naomi kissed Orpah goodbye. Orpah represented the broken dreams, the hurts, the disappointments, that things she didn't understand. Naomi was saying by that kiss: life has thrown me a curve, it hasn't been fair, but I'm at peace, I know God is still in control. And if you're going to reach destiny, you have to learn to kiss things goodbye. You're not going to understand everything that happens, people may walk away, life may not turn out the way you thought. It's easy to get bitter, hold a grudge, lose your passion. Do like Naomi, kiss the bitterness goodbye, kiss the person that left you goodbye, kiss the dream that didn't work out goodbye. God wouldn't have allowed it to happen, if he didn't have something better up in front of you.
But sometimes God will close the door, he'll move people out of your life. There are people and opportunities, that were ordained for your past, that are not ordained for your future. They were right for a season, but that season can come to an end. The key is: how we handle the closed doors? How you handle the disappointments? How you handle the people, that treated you wrong? Sometimes, instead of kissing them goodbye, we smack them goodbye. Good riddance, I didn't like you in the first place, don't let the door hit you on the way out. Naomi could have turned away angry, thought, I'm not gonna kiss you, Orpah. Some friends you are, that would have kept her from the new things, God had in store. She moved back to Bethlehem with her daughter-in-law Ruth. Ruth married Boaz, a wealthy man, that owned all the land. They had a baby. Naomi took care of their son, like he was her own. After all she had been through, all the broken dreams, all the loss, while holding the little baby, Naomi said in effect, I never dreamed I could be this happy, this fulfilled.
Her latter days were better than her former days. God knows how to give you beauty for ashes. He knows how to turn mourning into dancing. But it would have never happened, if she had not kissed Orpah goodbye. Are you at peace with your past or are you bitter over the loss? Upset because your plans didn't work out? Holding a grudge but that person walked away? It's time to kiss some things goodbye. Don't bring bitterness into a new year. Don't bring self-pity, a chip on your shoulder, that was in your past, it doesn't belong in the future. You cannot embrace the new things God has in store, as long as you're holding on to the old.
My father went to be with the Lord back in 1999, some 20 years ago. I lost one of my best friends. I still miss him, but I realize the loss of my father is in my past, it's not in my future. If I would have brought all the hurt, the questions, the self-pity, I wouldn't be where I am. You won't have the strength to move forward, if you're weeping over what's behind. Takes a lot of energy to think about the past, relive the hurts, wonder why it didn't work out. That person you lost, if they were supposed to be here, they would still be here. If somebody left you, I say it respectfully, you don't need them. If it didn't work out the way you had planned, it wasn't supposed to. God's ways are not our ways. Will you trust him, when it doesn't make sense? Start kissing things goodbye. You spend enough energy on the past, that doesn't take you anywhere, kiss that disappointment goodbye. That door didn't close by accident, God is directing your steps. It was either not the right time or because he has something better.
A friend of mine owned a very successful business for years, he was a leader in his field and saw all kinds of growth and increase. He had big dreams to leave his company to his children, to continue the legacy. After 25 years things started to slow down, the competition around him increased, so he started working harder, going in earlier. I would call him and he was meeting with staff at 6:00 in the morning, he was determined to make it work, he did everything he possibly could. But God is called the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end. We get excited about the beginning, talked a lot about God doing a new thing, but we don't hear a lot about the omega, the end. And just as God opens doors, sometimes God will close the door, he'll bring things to an end. And this can be hard for us, because it feels like a setback.
And after all the hard work, my friend's company didn't make it. He was so discouraged, for several months he would hardly talk on the phone, he told me how he felt like a failure. He had all these plans, but it didn't work out the way he thought. I told him what I'm telling you, the best thing you can do, is just kiss it goodbye. Don't bring a failure from yesterday into today. If one dream dies, get back up and dream another dream. He got his passion back and went out and started a consulting business. All kinds of doors begin to open. Today he has more clients, more influence, more opportunities, than he's ever had. His new company is many times more successful, than his own.
When life doesn't turn out the way you thought, remind yourself, God is still in control. Instead of being sour, losing your joy, kiss the disappointment goodbye. Quit reliving mistakes that you've made. Things that you wish you would have done different, wondering why it didn't work out. Like my friend, you may have done your best, giving it your all, but it didn't succeed. Accept it as God's plan and move on. Our attitude should be, God I trust you not just with my successes, I trust you with my failures, I trust you with the betrayals, I trust you with the things that don't make sense. When you kiss the past goodbye, it releases you into your future.
You have to be at peace with what's behind you, it's not enough to just move forward angry, bitter, mad at God. That's why Naomi kissed Orpah. It was symbolizing this is painful, I don't like it I feel betrayed, but I'm in peace. Takes maturity to kiss things, that don't feel good. This is what the prophet Samuel had to do. He spent years mentoring a young man named Saul, he took him under his wing and he trained him to become the next king of Israel. You can imagine, how proud Samuel was, when he saw this young man now grown and leading the Israelites. Everyone looked up to king Saul, he was tall and handsome, he looked like a king. But over time Saul got off course, he made poor decisions, he eventually lost the throne. Samuel was so disappointed, he thought: God, I put all this time and energy into him, I've invested my life and it seems like it was all a big waste.
You would think God would say, I understand Samuel, too bad, it didn't work out. But God didn't let him feel sorry for himself. He said Samuel, how long are you going to mourn over Saul? God is asking us: how long are you going to mourn over what you've lost? How long are you going to be discouraged over who hurts you, and what you didn't get, and the boss that wasn't fair? I don't believe in giving people the right to feel sorry for themselves not because they don't have a good reason, some people have gone through things that nobody should have to go through, but I've learned, if you stay in self-pity with a chip on your shoulder, thinking you have a reason to live defeated, you will never see the vindication, the restoration, the promotion the favor, that belongs to you. God wants to pay you back, for what was unfair. Don't sit around in self-pity, kiss the bad break goodbye, kiss the unfair childhood, goodbye kiss that injustice goodbye.
God told Samuel fill your horn with oil, I am sending you to the house of Jesse, I have chosen one of his son's as the next king. God was saying, Samuel, if you'll kiss this disappointment goodbye and start moving forward, I'll show you the new king. One of your dreams may have died, that didn't stop God's plan, he has another dream. One relationship may not have worked out: if you kiss goodbye the old, God will show you the new. David went on to become the greatest king that ever lived. When God makes up for what you lost, it's not going to be less than, it's not going to be equal, it's going to be better. Just because it hasn't turned out the way you thought, doesn't mean you have to settle for second best. God has to come up with a plan b, God already knew what would happen. He knew every door that would closed, he knew every person that would walk away, he knew how you'd spend time and energy, but a dream not come to pass. All that is getting you prepared for where God has taken you. Now don't get stuck mourning over Saul, disappointed over a bad break, bitter because of a loss. Kiss it goodbye, move forward and you will see your David's, you will see more than you can ask or think.
When we were trying to buy property to build a new sanctuary, twice the land we found was sold out from under us. We had an appointment at 8 o'clock in the morning to close on the first property, we showed up at 7:45. The secretary walked out and said, I'm sorry the owner sold the property last night. I couldn't believe that he didn't keep his word, I went home so disappointed, and I told Victoria what happened, how we didn't have the property and how we'd never be able to build, how we were stuck, how we couldn't keep growing. I had a sad song and I thought I was convincing. She looked at me and said Joel, God is still on the throne, this is not a surprise to him, we are going to stay in faith and believe something better is coming.
I didn't want to hear that, I wanted to feel sorry for myself. The flesh likes to have a pity party. She was telling me what I'm telling you, kiss it goodbye, move forward. When things happen like that, that you don't understand, you can be sure, God is up to something, he is working behind the scenes. Now I came back to a place of peace. I knew if God wanted us to have that property, no person could have stopped us. And just the opposite, if God doesn't want us to have something, all of our efforts won't make it happen. He's the alpha and the omega, he knows how to not only open doors that no man can shut, he knows how to close doors that no man can open.
Are you upset over a door God closed, people he moved out of your life, a dream he didn't let come to pass yet? Six months later we received word, that the Compaq Center was coming available. Right then I knew, why those doors closed. Buying property would have been second-best, that would have been keeping Saul, the Compaq Center is David, more than we can imagine. I'm asking you to be at peace with your past, peace with things you don't understand, not bitter, not angry, not with a chip on your shoulder. Maybe you didn't have a good childhood, nobody was there to speak faith into you, God knew how you would be raised, that's not going to keep you from your destiny, it's leading you to your destiny. Kiss it goodbye and move forward.
You can't become who you were created to be with the chip on your shoulder, thinking that you're at a disadvantage. If you'll take the hand you bend down and make the most of it, God will open doors you couldn't open, his favor on your life will take you, where you couldn't go on your own. Why don't you kiss the self-pity goodbye? Kiss that condescending spirit goodbye. Kiss always having to be right goodbye. Don't bring a bad attitude into a new year, being sarcastic, critical, seeing in the worst in everybody. Some people can wear designer clothes, put on makeup, have nice hair, they look great on the outside, the problem is, none of that can cover up what's on the inside. If we would work half as much on the inside as we do the outside, we'd be much better off. But if you don't kiss a bad attitude goodbye, the problem is, you'll be at the same place next year as you are right now.
And sometimes we're waiting for God to change things, God is waiting for us to make a decision. You have to put your foot down and say, I am not coming into a new year with old thinking. I am kissing the chip on my shoulder goodbye, I'm kissing the guilt goodbye, I'm kissing a barely get by mentality goodbye. When you kiss it, this means in your mind you're putting it into it. You're saying, this addiction is not going to control me anymore, I am free. Well you've made a lot of mistakes. Yes, but I've kissed them goodbye. I am not living in regrets, beating myself up, I am forgiven, I am redeemed I'm wearing a robe of righteousness. You've always been in dysfunction, that's how you were raised. You've always been hot-tempered, you always been angry. Yes, that's how I was raised, but that's not who I am - I'm kissing that goodbye, I'm putting an end to what's been passed down, I'm breaking the generational curse, and I'm starting the generational blessing.
You need to announce to that dysfunction, you may have been in my 2018, but I have bad news you are not in my 2019. Mediocrity, depression, bitterness, anger, I'm kissing you goodbye. I won't be seeing you this year, we are parting ways, hate to say it and not gonna miss you, see you're not going to be you. Kissed loneliness goodbye. Father, thank you, that you have somebody awesome already headed my way, thank you, that the right person is chasing me down. Goodbye lack, struggle, not having enough, you were in my yesterday, but sorry, you're not in my today. Father, thank you, that I will lend and not borrow. Thank you, that whatever I touch will prosper and succeed.
Maybe you need to kiss goodbye to the way you see yourself: inferior, unattractive, not a good personality, not talented enough - kiss that wrong self-image goodbye. Victory starts in your thinking. Abundance, health, freedom, it starts in our mind. You can't think the same way and expect different results. Start embracing who God says you are: you are fearfully and wonderfully made, you are a masterpiece, you have been crowned with favor, you have royal blood flowing through your veins. Nobody in this world has your same fingerprints, you didn't come up in a sembly line, you are an original, one-of-a-kind, made in the image of Almighty God.
I wonder where you could be at this time next year, if you'd start kissing things goodbye, kiss the offense goodbye. Quit letting people hurt your feelings, quit letting what they say ruined your day, tune it out. They have a right to say what they want, you have a right to ignore it. You shouldn't let that get down in your spirit. With joy I'm praying, that these people at work will quit talking about me. I don't want to discourage you, but they may never quit talking about you, they are jealous of the favor and blessing on your life. Take it as a compliment, they don't talk about average people, they talk about exceptional people. They don't talk about people that aren't doing anything, they talk about people that are taking new ground, people that are making a difference, people that stand out.
It's a test. God is seeing if you're ready to go to the next level. If you get upset, bitter, start thinking about how you're going to pay them back or are you going to kiss it goodbye and keep running your race, enjoying your life? Those adversaries are getting you prepared for your destiny. Where you're going, there will be opposition, critics, people trying to pull you down. The good news is, no weapon formed against you will prosper, they cannot stop you. The forces that are for you are greater, than the forces that are against you. Stay on the high road and stay focused on what God has put in your heart. You don't have time to get distracted by all the negative chatter. What people think about you is none of your business. What they're saying shouldn't concern you. There'll always be somebody, that doesn't like you, kiss it goodbye and keep moving forward.
Now, there may be some relationships you need to kiss goodbye. And I'm not talking about your husband or your wife, somebody just thought they got their word for 2019. Your time is too valuable to spend it with peace stealers, people that try to get you all riled up, or with dream killers, people that tell you what you can't become, or with compromisers, people that cause you to give in to temptation.
I've had this friend a long time, I don't hang out with them, they may get upset. What you're unwilling to walk away from is where you'll get stuck. If you don't kiss the wrong people goodbye, you'll never meet the right people. And if someone is not adding value to your life, making you better, pushing you toward your destiny, you need to make a change. And sometimes it's just a new season. The friends you had five years ago may not be the friends you need now. Everybody can't go where you're going. It doesn't mean they're not good people, you've just outgrown them, you're going at a faster pace. If you continue hanging around them, it will limit your growth. You need to gradually spend less and less time with.
Them Naomi's daughter-in-law Orpah, she was a good person, Naomi loved her, they had spent years together, but Naomi recognized, Orpah sparked in her story was over. She didn't try to talk her into stay. If someone is supposed to be in your life, you can't make them leave and if someone leaves easily, they're not supposed to be there. Quit trying to talk people in the state. You don't have to convince anyone to love you, to call you, to come see you, you are a gift, you are a prize, you have something amazing to offer, if they don't want to be there, that's a sure sign, they're not supposed to be there. God has people already ordained, that you can't make leave, people that want to celebrate you, people that love spending time with you. If somebody wants to leave, let them leave. Your destiny is not tied to the people that walked away. Be respectful, but kiss the Orpah's goodbye.
God told Abraham to leave his relatives and move to a different city. I'm sure, he loved his relatives. For a season everything was fine, but when God was about to promote Abraham and do something big in his life, he knew, his relatives, and the people where he lived, wouldn't be able to handle it. The people closest to you may not see the greatness in you. When they're familiar, they can dismiss you as just being ordinary. Sometimes you have to kiss people goodbye, so you can become all you were created to be.
This is what my father had to do. At 17 years old he knew, he had more in him, but his parents told him to just stay on the farm and pick cotton with them the rest of his life. And they loved my dad, they were trying to protect him, but they couldn't see his seeds of greatness. They didn't see a man that would touch nations, they just saw their son. Nothing special, he's just one of us. My father very respectfully kissed them goodbye and went out and started ministering. God opened amazing doors and he went on to leave his Mark. Don't let people talk you out of what God put in your heart. When you come to the end of life, you're not going to have to stand before people and give an account, you're going to stand before God. I would rather disappoint people, than disappoint God, I would rather hurt a few feelings than to miss my destiny.
Is there something you need to kiss goodbye? A hurt, a bad attitude, an area that you're compromising in. Don't bring it into a new year, that's in your past, doesn't belong to your future. The apostle Paul said, forgetting what lies behind, I press to the high calling. If there's a high calling, that means there's a low calling. You can go through life holding on to hurts, wrong attitudes, with people that are not good for you, but that will keep you from new levels, from the high calling, that belongs to you. It's time to start kissing things goodbye. Kiss that failure goodbye, this is a new day. Kiss guilt goodbye, you've been forgiven. Kiss the bad break goodbye, God has something better. If you'll do this, I believe and declare, you're about to come into the high calling, new doors are going to open, new relationships, favor, healing, breakthroughs, the fullness of your destiny in Jesus name.