Joel Osteen - The Power of No
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I want to talk to you today about The Power of «No.» To reach our potential, we have to say «yes.» Yes to our dreams. Yes to God’s promises. Yes to the right people. «Yes» is incredibly important. But «yes» alone is not enough. What you say «no» to has as much impact as what you say «yes» to. And «yes» is typically easier. It’s the path of least resistance. But if you don’t learn to say «no, » you will never get to your greater «yeses.» There’s power in «no.» «No» to compromising. «No» to people-pleasing. «No» to distractions. «No» takes discipline to not let our emotions rule us. It’s not something that comes naturally. Our flesh wants to have its own way. And most of us are good at saying «yes.» Do you want to stay up late and watch TV? «Yes, » that’s fun. Do you want to go to the mall and not do your homework? «Yes, » let’s go. Do you want that third bowl of Blue Bell chocolate chip ice cream? «Yes.» You don’t even need to ask.
There’s a battle taking place between our flesh and our spirit. The flesh wants to take the easy way out. It wants instant gratification. But Proverbs says, «A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls.» In those days, when the walls were down around a city, the enemy could easily come in and do whatever they wanted. If you say «yes» all the time and there’s no self-control, no self-discipline, then your walls are down; there’s no defense, no protection, and sometimes we’re our worst enemy. We’re saying «yes» to offense. They did me wrong. «Yes» to compromise, friends pulling us down. «Yes» to mediocrity, showing up late to work.
You can have all the talent in the world and all the opportunity, but if you don’t have self-control, the discipline to say «no» to things you know you shouldn’t do, then you won’t reach your destiny. You may want to tell somebody off; you know, the clerk is rude, and the neighbor offends you. Your flesh — that’s our lower nature — will say, «Let them have it. Be rude back to them. " The easy thing is to agree. «Yes, » that sounds good. Lord, thank you for that idea. But every idea is not from God. You have to discern between the still, small voice of the spirit and the loud, angry voice of the flesh.
Be still. Get quiet and listen to what God is saying. Don’t let the flesh, your carnal desires, dictate your life. You’re in control of your «yeses» and your «nos.» It’s easy to say, «Yes, I’m going to get upset. Yes, I’m going to pay them back.» Try a different approach. Learn the power of «no.» «No» to arguing and having to have your way. «No» to watching things that are poisoning your spirit. «No» to peer pressure, letting people talk you into compromising. Every «no» is leading to a better «yes.» And the «nos» are not an option. They are necessary for you to reach your destiny.
Moses was born into a Hebrew family, but he was raised by the Pharaoh’s daughter and Egyptian princes. He grew up in the palace with prestige and influence. However, as a young man, he saw how the Egyptians were oppressing the Hebrews, enslaving them and mistreating them. Something rose up inside him. He knew that wasn’t right. The scripture says he refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter; instead, he chose to stand with the people of God. Here he had it made -wealth, influence, an easy life. Thoughts were telling him, «Don’t rock the boat, Moses.» But he dared to say, «No, I’m not taking the easy way out. I’m not going to sit back and watch my family suffer and compromise with these people.» He refused to be called by their name.
Look at that boldness. It wasn’t easy. But if you’re going to reach the fullness of your destiny, there will be times you have to put your foot down and refuse things that are less than God’s best. Refuse the addictions that have hindered your family. Refuse to be cynical like those around you. Refuse the offense and unforgiveness that’s trying to poison your life. Had Moses not said no as a young man, he would have never seen a bigger yes; had he stayed in the palace where it was comfortable, thinking things were good here, good could be the enemy of the best. Without that no, Moses would have never brought the Israelites out of slavery, would have never seen the Red Sea part, or the enemies drown in the water. That no may be difficult, but it’s leading to a yes much greater than you can imagine.
The scripture says, «No discipline at the time is pleasant, but later on you will see a reward.» We focus too much on right now. It’s hard to say no to this friend. «Joel, this is dragging me down. I’m comfortable.» You’re right where Moses was. Are you going to obey the flesh or the spirit? God asks for the nos not to make your life harder; it’s because he has bigger yeses, greater things in your future. But the no is required to get to the yes.
«Well, it’s hard to get up early and exercise. It’s hard to not eat things that are making me unhealthy. It’s hard to control my mouth, Joel. It’s hard not to watch things that are poisoning me.» Here’s the key: the pain of discipline is less than the pain of regret. The pain of discipline weighs ounces. The pain of regret weighs tons. It’s going to take courage, and I know it’s hard to do what you don’t feel like. But that pain is much less than looking back and realizing I was supposed to deliver the Israelites, so to speak. God had these big yeses. I could have been at new levels — more blessed, more happy — but I didn’t refuse what was limiting me. I didn’t learn the power of no.
We focus on the pain right now. We need to think more about later on. Moses was uncomfortable leaving the palace. But later on, when he was watching the Israelites march out of Egypt — two million people free after 10 generations of slavery — not one part of him said, «I wish I hadn’t said no back then. I wish I’d taken the easy way out.» You will never see your greater yeses without saying no to certain things. They may be good; Moses living in the palace, nothing wrong with that. But he sensed there was more in him, that he was destined to deliver God’s people. If you’ll be uncomfortable now, later on you’ll look back and think it was well worth it. When you see where God takes you, you’ll be glad you said no.
Years ago, I was invited to meet with some executives at SiriusXM. They asked me to do a one-hour program once a week that they could run on one of their channels. I was very honored. It was a great opportunity, but I didn’t feel right about it. I’d never done anything on the radio, and it seemed like God opened this door. For some reason, I didn’t have peace. I told them how grateful I was, but I would have to pass. Two years later, they asked for another meeting. The executive said, «You didn’t want to do the one-hour program once a week. What if we gave you your own channel, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week?» I said, «Now that sounds good.»
Had I not said no to the good thing, I would never have seen the bigger yes. That’s right. Trust what you feel in your spirit. What God is going to do in your life is bigger than what you have planned. He’ll speak to you in the still, small voice and through uneasiness. This isn’t right. It may not make sense, but God knows what He’s doing. He can see the big picture. Sometimes you have to say no to what you’re comfortable with. It’s not bad. You’re not doing anything wrong, but God is calling you higher. He’s about to bring you into a greater yes, but He’s asking you to come up higher — to say no to watching so much on your TV or phone. To say no to comparing and competing with your friends and always trying to keep up, outperform — get off that treadmill. That’s not going anywhere. Or to say no to being against yourself, feeling inferior, not good enough, or not attractive.
You have to do like Moses: put your foot down and refuse to live that way. Don’t let the enemy steal your destiny by seeing yourself the wrong way. Are there things that you need to say no to today? Do you feel that conviction? God’s speaking to you. You keep putting it off: «I’ll do it later. I don’t want to be uncomfortable. That’s going to be hard.» The longer you wait, the harder it’s going to be. There’s a window of grace to do what you know you’re supposed to do. God is going to breathe on your life and give you the ability to do hard things. You are in one of those windows now. You wouldn’t be hearing this if you weren’t well able. Don’t miss your moment. What you say no to is going to open the door to a yes that you’ve never imagined.
This is what Joseph did. His brothers were jealous and sold him into slavery in Egypt. He was working for a man named Potiphar, running his household. Well, Potiphar’s wife liked Joseph. She tried to seduce him. When Potiphar wasn’t home, she’d come around, make advances, and let him know that she was interested. But Joseph was a man of great character and integrity. When God has something big in your future, you’ll be tested along the way. Can you handle more influence, more favor, more resources? This is where many people get stuck. They’re not good at saying no. They want the pleasure of the moment. They give in to their fleshly desires, not realizing that’s keeping them from the much greater pleasure that God has in store.
Joseph was alone in the house. Potiphar was gone. Just him and this wife that’s after him. Nobody would have known. Joseph was already disappointed. Life had thrown him a bad break, held against his will in a foreign land. What does he have to lose? But Joseph understood we have to win battles in private before God will bless us in public. What you do when no one is watching will determine how much God can entrust you with. Joseph knew that people may not be watching, but God is watching. He controls the universe. Promotion doesn’t come from people. It comes from the Lord. Paul said to Timothy to run from temptation. Don’t hang around and think that you can withstand it. I’m strong, Joel. I’m not going to give in. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.
If you’re married and someone’s interested in you, stay away from them. You may work with them, but do what you can to keep your distance. If they take the elevator, you take the stairs. If they go out the front door, you go out the back. If they come in at 8, you come in at 7:45. Don’t make it harder than it has to be. The scripture says, «Be careful when you think you stand, lest you fall.» That means don’t play with fire or you’re going to get burned. Stay out of the kitchen or you’re going to eat the donut. Don’t go to the barber shop or you’re going to get a haircut. It says to run from temptation. That’s aggressive. It could have said walk, jog, or move quickly. You have to be on the offensive.
«Well, Joel, I know these friends aren’t making good decisions. They give in to temptation, but I’m smarter than that. I’m not going to do it.» First Corinthians says, «Bad company corrupts good character.» I don’t doubt that you’re good, but your good is not going to rub off on them. Their bad is going to rub off on you. It says in Psalms 1, «Don’t sit inactive in the path of sinners. Don’t hang around people who don’t have what you want. You’re going to be like them.»
Are you sitting inactive with people who compromise, gossip, and show no integrity? That’s going to rub off on you. You need to run from that temptation. Quit making it harder. It’s difficult enough to deal with things we have no control over. When Potiphar’s wife comes, so to speak, we can’t stop that. When things randomly pop up on your computer, perhaps you were born into a family of dysfunction. None of that is our choice. We have the grace to resist. But when you’re putting yourself in environments of compromise and temptation, with people who don’t honor God, you’re making it more difficult. Well, all the guys party on my ball team. They all go out afterward and mess around. Find some new friends. Find a new team to play on.
Your destiny is too important. The calling on your life is too significant. What God has assigned you to do can impact your family for generations to come. You have to learn to say no, to live holy with integrity, doing the right thing when no one is watching. The people you spend time with need to push you up and not drag you down. And I know we need to be lights and help those who are struggling, but you don’t need to be around that on an ongoing basis. Don’t sit inactive with people who are bringing out the worst in you. Staying in healthy environments is essential. Where you position yourself and who you choose to spend time with will make you or break you.
I heard about this lady who was on a diet and doing so well. She used to go to this bakery all the time on the way to work to buy desserts. She was so determined that she started driving another way so she wouldn’t have to pass by it. She didn’t want to be tempted to stop. One day the road was closed, and she had to take the old way. She prayed, «God, help me to resist the temptation to stop. Help me to stand strong.» The closer she got, the weaker she felt. She could taste those desserts. She said, «God, I’ll make a deal. If there’s not a parking space right up front, I won’t pull in.» A few minutes later, she came home with a dozen desserts. She told her husband, «I couldn’t help it. On the eighth time around the block, there was a front-row spot.» Do yourself a favor. Run from temptation. Stay away from people and things that you know will pull you down.
One day, Potiphar’s wife came up to Joseph and grabbed him, saying, «Come with me.» She pulled on his coat, but the scripture says Joseph tore himself away. We’re talking about integrity and discipline. He had plenty of excuses. She was the aggressor; it was her idea. But Joseph knew the power of no. He understood that if he said yes to compromise, yes to being unfaithful, he would never see the greater yeses. He wasn’t thinking about right then; he was thinking about later on. How is this decision going to impact my future? Don’t let short-term pleasure keep you from a long-term blessing.
That’s what Esau did. You remember in the scripture he had been out hunting all day long and hadn’t caught anything, and came back so hungry, so famished. He smelled his brother’s pot of stew. Jacob had just cooked a great meal. He said, «Let me have some of your stew, Jacob. I’m starving.» Jacob replied, «I’ll give it to you if you’ll give me your birthright.» Well, his birthright was his inheritance. Esau was the firstborn son, and the firstborn got a much bigger portion. Esau thought, «Man, I’m so hungry. I can’t take this anymore.» He let his emotions rule instead of him ruling his emotions. He gave away his birthright for a pot of stew. Later on, he regretted it greatly. He got short-term pleasure, but it cost him a lifetime blessing. Don’t let that be you. Learn to say no to rule over your emotions.
When Potiphar’s wife saw that Joseph wasn’t going to give in, she started screaming and falsely accused him of trying to harm her. He was put in prison for something he didn’t do. Another setback. Joseph could have been bitter, but he said no. He could have slacked off, but he kept being his best. He was put in charge of the whole prison. The baker, one of his cellmates, was released from prison. He promised to help Joseph, but he forgot about him. Joseph could have gotten sour; that was the last straw. But he said no. If you’re going to fulfill your destiny, you have to get good at saying no.
It’s easy to say yes, let our feelings rule, live bitter, and pay people back. But yes won’t get you to your destiny. The no takes discipline and self-control, but those no’s always lead to bigger yeses. I know it’s difficult to bite our tongues, walk away from Potiphar’s wife, and have integrity when no one’s watching. But that pain of discipline is going to bring a great reward. You are passing the test; you are proving to God that He can trust you with greater favor and greater influence. Many people are conditioned to say yes and just do what they feel. God is looking for Josephs — people who take the high road, do the hard thing, and run from temptation.
A friend of mine has struggled with alcohol as long as I’ve known him. He got to the place where he accepted it, thinking, «This is just who I am.» About two months ago, he woke up one morning with this new passion, a resolve that he had never felt. He didn’t really know where it came from, but he said, «I made up my mind that I was done with alcohol, that it wasn’t going to keep destroying my life.» He had said yes for years, but that day he rose up and said no. That was a turning point. He has not touched alcohol since then. He’s like a different person. He never dreamed he could be free and feel good, not be hung over all the time, but live healthily and excited. And I know that wasn’t normal; that was the hand of God, supernatural deliverance. But it all started when he made the decision to say no.
And maybe there are things you’ve been saying yes to for years, things you’ve gotten comfortable with. «Joel, I’ve always struggled with this addiction» or «always had a problem watching things I shouldn’t» or «always, you know, being unfaithful, jealous, or complaining.» Let this be the day you rise up like my friend and say no. No to compromise, no to jealousy, no to temptation. When you do your part, God will step in and do His part. There will be a supernatural grace to break the bad habits and to bring down strongholds that have held you back. It may be a little painful, but you’ve got to dig down deep and be disciplined. Later on, you’re going to see the hand of God take you where you’ve never dreamed. He’s going to give you the favor and the courage to do what you couldn’t do before.
There’s another man in the scripture named Gehazi. He was Elisha’s assistant. One time, Elisha prayed for a man with leprosy, and he was healed. The man was so excited and so grateful that he asked Elisha if he could pay him or give him some kind of gift. Elisha said, «No, it was God who healed you, not me. You don’t ever have to pay for prayer. You can’t buy a miracle. The blessing of God is always free.» But this man was determined. «Come on, Elisha. You’ve done so much for me. Let me at least give you some silver or gold.»
Again, Elisha refused and wouldn’t take anything. The man and his party left and headed back toward their city. Gehazi, the assistant, overheard the conversation. Something whispered to him, «You should go get that treasure. This could be easy money. Nobody will know.» Temptation comes to us all: to be dishonest, to be unfaithful, to be offended. The flesh wants to say yes. That feels good. I like it. But the scripture says if you live by the dictates of the flesh, you will die. That means if you let ordinary impulses rule, you won’t reach your destiny.
When Gehazi felt that desire to be dishonest, that impulse to secretly take those funds, he could have simply said, «No, I’m not going there. That’s not who I am.» But he let his guard down, allowed his emotions to rule, and snuck away when Elisha wasn’t watching. He caught up with them. They wondered what was going on. Gehazi said, «We’ve had some unexpected guests join us.» Elisha was wondering if you’d still give us that silver and gold. They said, «Of course, » and loaded him down with all the treasure. He made it back to Elisha, acting normally, like everything was fine. Elisha said, «Gehazi, where have you been?» He said, «Nowhere, just right here.»
The scripture says immediately his skin was filled with leprosy. What we do in private matters to God. Elijah didn’t see him take the funds; he wasn’t there. But God sees everything. There were some big yeses in Gehazi’s future, but he didn’t say no to the little things. God would have given him far more treasure than he stole. That was a test. Gehazi, can I trust you to say no to being dishonest? Joseph, no to being unfaithful. Moses, no to impressing my people. David, no to getting revenge on King Saul. Nehemiah, no to getting distracted and fighting with the critics. They all said NO and went on to greater YESes, not Gehazi. He didn’t learn the power of no, how to not let his emotions rule him.
You never hear anymore about Gehazi. What’s really sad is Elisha was Elijah’s assistant. Remember, he got a double portion of Elijah’s anointing. Gehazi was Elisha’s assistant. He was next in line. He should have had four times the anointing of Elijah, but he didn’t pass the test. Don’t let that be you. Learn to say no to compromise, no to wrong friends, no to distractions that are wasting your time. Life’s short. We’re not going to be here forever. It’s easy to get stuck in a rut, a negative cycle. Like my friend with that addiction, it’s time to break those patterns. Examine your life: how you spend your time, your friendships, your environments. God is calling us up higher. He has greater levels, but the greater requires greater discipline, greater consecration.
What do you need to say NO to today? It may not be some great sin, but something that’s limiting your growth, causing you not to blossom like you should. Are your walls down? There’s no self-control. Let this be the day that you rise up and say, «No, you’re not going to let the natural impulses dictate your life. You’re going to rule your emotions like Joseph. You’re going to run from temptation, not sit inactive with people that pull you down.» Let me tell you, if you learn the power of no, I believe, declare, you’re going to come into greater yeses, something you’ve never seen: favor, promotion, healing, breakthroughs, freedom, the fullness of your destiny in Jesus' name. And if you receive it, can you say amen today?