James Meehan - Music and Mindsets
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James Meehan: Well, welcome to this week's episode of Culture Makers. I'm here with our friend, Riley Zavala.
Riley Zavala: And I'm here with our friend, James Meehan.
James Meehan: And that's me.
Riley Zavala: And we're wearing the same outfit.
James Meehan: The same outfit.
Riley Zavala: We didn't even plan it.
James Meehan: Well, not really.
Riley Zavala: One sec, James.
James Meehan: You messed up your jacket.
Riley Zavala: You know what, leave that in don't edit that out.
James Meehan: Okay, got it.
Riley Zavala: Because we're real here. Today we're gonna talk about, is it wrong to care about what you look like? Taylor Swift's new, old album, and how to process our emotions. Things like anger, in a way that's really healthy. So stick around and hopefully you'll find something valuable through this conversation.
James Meehan: Yes.
Riley Zavala: Is it wrong to care about when you look like?
James Meehan: Okay, here's the thing, I don't think it's wrong to care about what you look like.
Riley Zavala: It goes back to your heart posture. So are you caring about what you look like for other people? Like for your friends and all of those things, because you're like, oh, I want them to think that I'm this way, I want them to like the clothes that I'm wearing, because I want them to like me. If that's your heart posture, then I think that's wrong. And that's just gonna end you up in a really unhealthy place. Because if you're living for other people in terms of what you're wearing and what you look like, just to like impress other people, then I mean that's just not a healthy thing for you to do to yourself. But if you enjoy fashion, if you enjoy taking care of yourself, you like to put on makeup, or you like to do your hair, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I think that totally makes sense to take care of yourself, to have fun doing that, and to put your best foot forward.
James Meehan: Come on, that's fantastic. Because it doesn't matter what you wear or what you put on your face, the deepest part of you is the image of God. You were created in the image of God. And no matter what you put on the outside of you, you can't take that away from what's inside of you. And so, I think that's really good. And if you happen to want to dress just like us because we're so freaking dope.
Riley Zavala: Yeah we are.
James Meehan: Join the party, come on!
Riley Zavala: Come on!
James Meehan: Come on. Taylor Swift's old, new album. Are you summoning a spirit bomb?
Riley Zavala: No.
James Meehan: "Dragon Ball Z" reference?
Riley Zavala: I love this album.
James Meehan: Dear gosh, this is so concerning. Don't worry, later we will talk about how to process our anger in a healthy way, so that'll be really valuable.
Riley Zavala: No it's not anger, I'm excited. I love, that was my excited face.
James Meehan: Wow.
Riley Zavala: Yeah, that's what it looks like when I'm excited.
James Meehan: That was what that looked like.
— Because, here's the deal. Taylor Swift she's remaking all of her old albums. If you didn't know this, because you live under a rock, that's what this show is for where here we go, we're helping you out. She's remaking them to like, kind of claim them, you know what I'm talking about. To make them her own and she's coming back strong. 'Cause not only is she re-releasing her albums, but then she's adding all the songs that are quote, unquote, "From The Vault". So songs that she wrote during that time that never made it on the album. And if you're like me, I was really into Taylor Swift when I was young. So whenever all this stuff came out, the "From The Vault" songs, most of them, you could find like dupes on like YouTube, with like this really cringy, like, lyric video.
— Oh, gosh!
— And so I know most of them anyways.
— Come on.
— And then the "10-minute" "All Too Well" version came out.
— I don't know anything about this.
— "All Too Well" was one of her best songs on the album. I mean, it ranked as one of the best songs, but it's also a personal opinion, just one of the best ones.
— Interesting.
— It was supposedly about her ex, Jake Gyllenhaal.
— I love Jake Gyllenhaal.
— She came out with a "10-minute Version", which was like, added content. That the Swifties, if you identify as a Swifty, are taking it and bashing Jake Gyllenhaal with it a little bit.
— Oh gosh!
— 'Cause they're like, "Dang, she's blaming Jake Gyllenhaal". And so everybody's all up in his...
— Oh, poor Jake.
— I know, everybody's all up in his comment section, blowing him up, being like, "Are you guys listening to the 'Red' album"? If you go to the comments, it's ridiculous. It's not how we should treat people but it is really funny, but that's not okay.
— It's one of those things where, again, we're gonna talk about this later about how to process our emotions well, but Taylor Swift wrote a song. Jake Gyllenhaal went on "Man Versus Wild" with Bear Grylls. I don't actually know if that's timeline linked, but I remember watching that episode thinking it was the coolest thing ever.
— Oh my gosh, I do feel bad for Jake though, because they dated so long ago that it's like, it's so irrelevant at this point to him.
— It is dredging up the past. And hopefully he's taking it as a joke.
— I think, I mean, I obviously don't know Jake, and Jake, if you're watching, I'm sorry for speaking for you. But I would say that he's probably just kind of like, it's fine, it's passed up. It's more for like the hype and it's gonna die down in 24 hours. So, I'm sure he's taking it like a champ. Way to go, Jake.
— Way to go, Jake. The "Red" album, you're talking about the song "All Too Well", here's the real question. Is that better than the greatest Taylor Swift song of all time,-
— Oh my gosh.
— "Love Story"? "It's a love story, baby just say yes".
— That's the only one of her worst songs.
— No, it's the best song.
— No, it's not. "He's Romeo and I'm Juliet, Sing now a duet".
— Okay, but you should, hey... Okay, stop doing that, you're not Taylor Swift. So, in the comment section below you should tell us what your favorite Taylor Swift album is because me and my best friend just got in a huge fight about it.
— Oh, wow!
— Not a real one, just a fake one.
— No, we got a real fight.
— We got a real fight about it because here's the thing, "Red" is clearly her best album, but then, "Folklore" I would say, it's my second favorite. And she was saying "Evermore" is better than "Folklore".
— Hmm, I can't wait into this conversation because...
— Anyway, moving on.
— "Teardrops On My Guitar", greatest of all time, go! Adele.
— She's releasing her new album!
— Yeah, which people are excited about.
— You're clearly not excited about this.
— Well, not really. I don't listen to that devil music, AKA secular music. "It's a love story, baby, just say, yes". I'm kidding. We've talked about this on previous episodes of Culture Makers.
— Yeah, go check it out, go check it out.
— Go check those out.
— Moving on, Mr. Beast, YouTuber.
— Oh, you just blazed past Adele, it's really good.
— Do you wanna talk more about Adele?
— No, it's fine, move on.
— All right, Mr. Beast, YouTuber, recreated a set from Squid Game, like his own version of it.
— For $2 million.
— Cost him $2 million, first question, where does he get all this money? Second question, what do you think about that?
— Dude, people just give him money for the most ridiculous stuff.
— I know, but people always say, "You don't know where he gets this money from? He gets it from people, people just give it to him". But who are these people?
— You know people.
— Is it just tiny little donations from millions of people?
— It's probably all of the above. It's probably tiny donations and ridiculous donations and he's just...
— From Elon Musk, you heard it here first folks, Culture Makers.
— Elon Musk and Bill Gates, totally fake news. But the stuff from Squid Game is actually so interesting looking. So, I mean, I don't blame him for recreating the set, if I had that kind of money, I would do it.
— Well, that is not at all, what would I do with that kind of money?
— Actually no, if I had that kind of money, I would give it to people because generosity.
— It felt really fake, but okay, so. So, we've got some questions from you, our viewers, that we want to tackle, the one that we've been teasing this entire time is from Lillian M. She asked the question, "Hey, I'm struggling with anger issues. What can I do to control my anger and emotions"?
— Well, James, I think you're the perfect person to answer this question 'cause don't you struggle with anger issues?
— Nope, never been angry in my life. When I was in middle school, I was a wee little lad.
— You used to fight people.
— I used to fight people...
— Yeah, I remember.
— All the time because I had such intense anger issues. And I had no idea how to process my emotions in a healthy way. Now, what was funny is back then, I started doing all sorts of weird tips and tricks I would find on the internet. One of them was when you find yourself getting angry, just curl your toes, and do that 10 times.
— Really?
— And what they would talk about is that when you would do things like that, you're actually getting out of your emotions and into the physical sensations of your body. That's something that I would try occasionally.
— It worked?
— And it was kinda helpful. It's sorta like deep breathing. People recommend that often, like, because what it does is, it forces you... Gross. It forces you to slow down, to pause, to get out of the moment, and back into the control of your body. And so you control something you can, to help you gain control of something that you maybe can't, like your anger emotions. The other thing that was really helpful for me, it was doing Mixed Martial Arts, Brazilian Jiu-jitsu, trained that for a bunch of years. And it was really helpful because...
— That makes sense.
— Through things like Martial Arts, you learn great things like discipline and self-control, because contrary to popular belief, getting angry does not make you a better fighter. It actually makes you sloppy and worse. I remember all the people...
— Interesting.
— Who would say things like, "Oh bro, when I get mad, then I'm just like a different person. Like I could whoop on somebody". And I just remember thinking like, "Oh yeah, you've clearly never trained Martial Arts".
— Dang, so great!
— So those are some of the things that I used to do. Now, honestly, one of the things that's most helpful is just taking time every morning and slowing down, breathing deeply and praying and asking God to guide me throughout my day. Because what I do is, I take time in the morning to slow down, to create space, to pause and reflect because whenever you get in the busyness of your day, there's usually not the same amount of time that you have to slow down and reflect on what is the best option, instead, you're sort of in reaction mode all day long. And so, that's one of the things that helps me basically practice my response before I ever get to the craziness of the day. And then in the middle of those really crazy times, the reality is, oftentimes, we won't be in full control of what we're doing and so we may lash out and react in a way that is less than what would be considered, loving and kind. And I think one of the best things that you can do after you've realized that's happened, is just go back to the people that you lashed out at and say, "Hey, I'm really sorry that I just lost my cool. I really wanna be better, will you forgive me"?. And it's even those tiny little conversations where you go back, you pause, you reflect on what you did wrong and commit to trying to do better, that will help you take these tiny little baby steps to have a little bit more self-control over your emotions.
— Dang, that's so great. Literally, what you were saying about the morning time is, I have... This is what good accountability and community looks like. I have friends who can tell if I didn't have time for like, my Jesus time, which I don't know if that tells you more about them and how they know me, or more about me and how I act. But literally, if I find myself being like more impatient, more quick to anger or just, I mean, I'll find myself like flustered easily or whatever. They'll be like, "Did you have your time with Jesus this morning"? Oh, that calls me out every time. But it's great. It's great to have that accountability because I'm the same way, I never realized in the moment how it affects me, but it really does change the way your day goes. And how you go about your day...
— Absolutely.
— When you have that time. And then the other thing I would just say is taking time in the moment. For me, I know it's better to actually remove myself from the situation, if I'm like really angry, and just give it a second. Because usually, I'm more angry and more likely to be irrational and respond out of that anger, like, in the first immediate moment, that even if I take a minute or two minutes to walk out, and then I'm thinking through it and logically. And then I'm like, oh, this is actually probably better to respond this way. So I even told my friends and the people around me, "Hey, if I need a second, because I'm angry, just give me that moment". 'Cause sometimes you have this friends who chase after you, and are like, "Are you okay"? And it's like, "No, I really just genuinely need a moment". And they know that. So they give me that time, come back and then we handle it much better.
— That's so good. So figure out how do you react in those moments? What's best for you? Is it to take a minute to get away? Is it to process through it in the here and now, whatever that looks like. And I would just encourage you to find some daily time to spend with Jesus, because the fruit of the Spirit, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Those are all things that come from being in the presence of God. And those are all things that help us respond better in the moment.
— So good.
— Brooke S wants to know, any tips on getting out of the mindset of focusing so much on the works aspect of our walk with God, rather than just having faith.
— That is a great question, I love that question so much.
— I hate it, I'm just kidding.
— I found that there are two types of people in this world when it comes to Christianity, that lean naturally one way or the other. So, some people find themselves leaning more towards grace of like, they just do whatever they want. More towards grace and faith, they're like, "Oh, da-da-da-da". I'm one of those people. I lean more towards grace versus like there's some people who maybe lean a little bit more legalistic of like, "I have to do these things so that God will love me". And then, they realized... And I always have those friends that realize that and they catch themselves and they're like, "Nope there's grace and truth". So it's like, we should pay attention to how we're acting, we should pay attention to how we're responding and operate out of that, because Jesus lives inside of us and we should live as Jesus. But at the same time, there is so much grace and so much faith involved, that we don't have to do everything perfect so that we have a relationship with God. He's already given it to us. For me, some of the things that have been the best for me is again, having a... I keep bringing up accountability and community, but it's great, because that's what you need in your life.
— For sure, absolutely. Having friends that will help bring that truth and processing 'cause there'll be times where I process with other people and I'm like, this is kind of what I'm finding myself in, or I'm finding myself doing more works instead of being, just trusting the Lord and all those things. And my friends being like, "Hey, but there's also this side of the things". You don't have to have everything figured out. You don't have to do all of the right things so that God will use you. And having those people to remind you of that. What else would you say?
— I would say, yes. I would say, the idea of faith and works is a and, and not an or.
— So good.
— And this is the thing that's so important to recognize, is that when we look at the scope of the New Testament, we see the writings from Paul, where he seems to lean really heavy on faith and grace, and not so much on works. But then we've got the Letter of James that is really heavy works, but they're not contradicting each other. Actually what they're doing is complementing each other.
— Yes, absolutely.
— And now, the way that we define faith in Switch, is that faith is trust based on evidence that leads to obedience. Because if you really trust that God is good and he's Lord, and he knows what's best for your life, then that should lead to you changing the way that you live. But here's the thing, us changing the way that we live does not earn God's love because grace, what is that? It is the unearned favor of God. There is nothing we can do to earn God's favor, but in response to the grace of God, we trust, we follow Him. We obey him because we know that life according God's ways is so much better than our ways. And so the fact that you're asking that question means you're wrestling with the very real tension that is choosing to follow Jesus faithfully. So I'm really glad that you asked that question. If there's anything else that we can do to support you in your journey of becoming a Culture Maker, a fully devoted follower of Christ, M\make sure you leave that in the comments down below and we're just thankful that you chose to spend some time with us. Riley, any last words?
— And, we're actually in the middle of a series, "By Faith".
— What! Fear Ain't In This House, Faith. Fear, False Evidence Appearing Real.
— Stop, stop!
— Fear, real, really, everyone, always, love. Love, Look Over Vine Energetic. Energetic, Everyone Needs...
— Oh my gosh! Ever Really God Eternal Trinity In Christ.
— They logged off. They're done, they're done. They're done. You're done. You're done.
— I don't watch those cults, I'm too holy.
— Okay, oh my gosh, we're derailing! "By Faith" is a new series that we're in. If you're watching this right now, you can join us on Switch Online.
— Too bad a long time ago.
— Focus right here. If you're joining... If you're joining us right now, join us on Switch Online. If you're watching this in the future, it's actually on our YouTube channel, we upload them every week. So "By Faith" is the name of the series, go check it out. We talk all about faith. And so that would be what I recommend you pay attention to, get into that, get into the Word.
— Okay. Goodbye.
— Wow! Bye!