Jack Graham - Men of Character

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TOPICS: The Way Home, Character, Integrity, Faithfulness

I want to speak to you on the subject of character, specifically men of character. Because I know if you are a Christ man, you want to be a great dad, right? You want to be, because it's the best job you will ever have. Did you know that? The best job you will ever have is being a dad. And ultimately, if you get to be a granddad, that's a great job, too. But we need to be men of character, men who are faithful to our wives, to our children, to our families, to our church, to our community, to our nation. What we need is godly men. Men like you and you and you and you who are willing to say, "Lord, I'm available to You. Fill me and use me, first and foremost, for my family".

That is the goal for every godly man is to be a man of character. Now we are seeing a problem relative to character not only in the community, but in the church. Sometimes young pastors ask me, what's the most important ingredient for a successful ministry? I don't have to think about it twice. Character, integrity. I had the opportunity several years ago to be at Yankee Stadium. That was a thrill. It's probably about 2008. The great Mariano Rivera, The Closer. The only person ever inducted into the Hall of Fame first ballot unanimously was not Babe Ruth or Ty Cobb or Lou Gehrig or Joe DiMaggio. It was Mario Rivera, the great closer. He's a strong believer in Christ, and we were there at batting practice.

And I had the opportunity, I just sat down with Mariano on the bench, and we were talking about faith and talking about life. And this was the prime of the Yankees. And they'd been through great series of championships, the New York Yankees, a well-known franchise. But they were losing. It was the middle of the year. They were having a bad season, and they had a lot of characters on their team. And one of them was bragging about having the biggest porn collection in Major League baseball. They were in internal fights with the team. There was problems in the team. And I said to Mariano, I said, "Mariano, what's the problem with the Yankees"? And he didn't hesitate. He just said two words: no character.

Warren Buffett was asked, what are the most important ingredients in hiring a successful person in your business? He said, "Well, one is competence: ability; that's so very important. Another is energy. We hire people who are energetic and the other is integrity". And Buffet went on to say, "without integrity, the other two talent and energy will kill you". You see, character is essential in life in anything that you are doing. And certainly, regarding being a parent and being a dad. So no wonder the God asks the question in Proverbs 20, verse 6: "but a faithful man who can find"? Where are the faithful men?

Well, I believe we have many faithful men that are in this church, and others who are watching us right now. You have to remember when you see a star fall from the sky, everybody oohs and awes, and notices a falling star. But there are millions and billions, perhaps trillions of stars in the skies that do not fall, but faithfully shine and do their job. And we need to remember that concerning church leaders and pastors. While falling stars are often noted... How many pastors are there in America? 40-50 million. I don't know, not million, but 40-50,000 churches in the Southern Baptist Convention alone. There are tens of thousands upon tens of thousands of faithful pastors and church leaders who are just doing the job that God has called them to do, loving their churches, loving their wives, loving their families.

So let's don't forget that in the midst of all of this. But to be faithful, there are many faithful men. And 2 Chronicles 16:19 says this "The eyes of the Lord are running to and from throughout the whole earth, looking for men to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless towards Him". That is a good word, blameless. Character is not perfection, because if it was perfection, none of us would be here. None of us. We're all flawed and fail. But we can be blameless in our lives in the sense, as one person put it, you have nothing to hide and nothing to fear. In the sight of God and the presence of your family and your friends, you are blameless.

So very important, dads, men that we be people of character. Picking up where we left off in the message last week in Psalm 128, verse 1, the scripture says, "Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in His ways". To fear the Lord, what does that mean? Not to dread Him, but to walk in His ways. And how do we know the ways of God? How do we know how to walk? God has given us the instruction manual, God has given us His infallible, inerrant Word. Men are not too good at times of reading directions on how to get somewhere. Men, if you want to get somewhere with God, you better read the instruction book. You better get God's Word open and listen to God as God leads us along.

So we have God's Word, and in God's Word we find out what character is; what it's all about. The word character in the ancient world literally meant an image or an imprint. So we use the word similarly today. We say a character is like an imprint on a typing, we type an image or they would put it on coins, an imprint on a coin or on currency, we do the same. So that's character, it's an imprint. And your character is what imprints people around you, the lives of your children and your family. That's character. But what is it. Character is honesty. Character is integrity. That's a similar word, integrity. And integrity literally means one or together. The word integer in mathematics, you can hear it there. Or integrate is the idea of integrity. And a building we says has integrity when it is structurally sound. And integrity, character.

So you've got humility, you've got honesty, you've got integrity, you have purity, and you have, one of my favorite words, authenticity. It's being real. None of our kids expect us to be perfect, dads. But our kids rightfully can expect us to be real. The opposite of integrity and character is duplicity, of course. And hypocrisy. When Jesus spoke of hypocrisy, He used an image of a person wearing a mask. In the ancient world when the plays were performed, one character would often use multiple masks to play the various roles.

So Jesus took this word out of the culture, and said, don't wear a mask; don't be a poser; don't be a pretender, posturing your way through life. You're not an actor on the stage as a Christian, and genuineness is what's all about. Genuineness, real. If you get right down to it for the Christian, it is godliness, Christ likeness, and it comes from within. It's an inside job. Reputation is what people think about us, and it's good to have a good reputation. But if you will take care of your character, God will take care of your reputation. Because character comes from the inside out. It's an inside job. And when there is a lack of character, you are exposed to all kinds of disaster. You know what happened to this building when the storm hit with 90 mile an hour winds?

So the wall was holding against the wind, and most of the wall did. But in this particular place in our worship center, it's a vacuum. The catwalk was up there and there was a vacuum. And the engineers tell us that what happened when the high winds came and blew against the side of the building, the vacuum that was on the inside created this explosion that literally blew the side of the building out. And I thought, what a picture that is. What happens to people when if there is not character within and strength within and stability in Christ at the core of our being, then when the pressures come, we collapse. We get crushed. Why? No character. But when there is character, we can withstand the pressures and the circumstances of life.

In fact, that's another attribute of character as far as I'm concerned, is strength and stability when tough times come. And men, that's what we need. We need that kind of character. Christ likeness and godliness. That's what I'm doing right now. I'm defining character. And remember Character for the Christian is the work of the Holy Spirit. There are people who are not Christian that have a certain amount of character. But if you are a Christian, then the Holy Spirit does something unique in us, reproducing the life of Christ. And in Galatians 5 we're told, "The fruit of the Spirit is love and joy and peace and patience and kindness and goodness and gentleness and meekness and faithfulness and self-control".

That's the fruit of the Spirit. Let's talk for a few moments about refining character. How is character refined in our lives? Well, look in your Bibles in James, the first chapter of James, and it says, "When trials come, count it all joy, my brothers", verses 2 through 4. "When you meet trials of various kinds, when you know that the testing of your faith produces", what? "steadfastness". That's a great word. Be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord. You know your labor in the Lord is not in vain. So when the heat is on, when trials come, count it all joy. Add it up, count it as joy, because this testing of your faith produces steadfastness or endurance, character.

And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete; that is, fulfilled and complete, lacking in nothing. Paul gives us this same principle in Romans chapter 5:3 and 5. "Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance and endurance produces character, and characters produces hope". We hope in Jesus. Come, Jesus come. And we do it with character and conviction. And when we think about perseverance and resilience in face of the struggles and the battles that we face in life, don't thing of tenacity (another word I like a lot: tenacious).

Don't think of being trustworthy and true to your convictions as being you know, just grin and bear it. Or perseverance is just enduring it. No, as Christians, we endure with joy. "Count it all joy"! And yes, we can rejoice even in the trials that we're going through when the storms are unleashed against us because we know deep within that there is hope in Christ. We have character. "He who has this hope in Him purifies himself". There is resilience as we are dependent upon the Lord. So if you want character in your life, you have to go through some things. You have to be willing to go through some trials, and we all do. But know that those trials and those tribulations enable us to get stronger mentally, spiritually, and even physically.

The Bible says we are to exercise ourselves unto godliness. Just as you would exercise your body to get stronger, to run harder and longer or to live more. When you exercise yourself in godliness, you are enduring some things to get stronger in your faith. And so we practice spiritual disciplines and we endure hardships and danger. Why? Because God's doing a greater work in us. God's doing a deeper work in us. And so then aligning our character with our families. Aligning our character means that, dads, here's a word to you, that we are aligning our faith in Jesus Christ with our families and we are walking with God, living godly lives, being godly men, being a man of God, fearing God.

And as a result of that, there's several things I want to mention that we will do as fathers. Number one, we will be present. We will be present. Away with absentee dads. Dads, get off your screen at home, get with your kids. Spend time at home with your family. Be present. Go to everything you can go to, games and concerts and all the rest.

My friend Tim Clinton wrote this in Fox News Online. He's a wonderful brother and heads the largest association of Christian counselors in the world. But he said this: "Young or old, male or female, we all look in the stands for our dad. And consider his presence and influence one of the most important factors in life. For good or bad, dads have profound impact on the life of a child by what they say and do, or what they don't say or do. The research is clear. If we were able to stem the fatherlessness issue, our kids would be more able to handle peer pressure, less given to substance abuse, be more secure in their male and female identities, less likely to experience mental health issues, and more".

Then he said, "Our prayer is that of Malachi 4:6: 'And he will turn the hearts of their fathers to their children. And the hearts of the children to their fathers'". And then he closed with these words: "To all the dads who are showing up, your kids see you. See you at the game." So a big part of being a great dad is to just show up and be there. Be prayerful, of course, pray that your children will come to know Jesus as their Lord and Savior. Pray that your children will be discipled and grown their faith. Pray that they will learn to be servants of Christ and have a mission and a purpose in their lives. Pray that thy will be generous with others. Pray that God would give them wisdom. Pray for their spouses, even yet to come.

Be prayerful for your children. And I might say, children, all the boys and girls of all ages in here, are you praying for your dad? I mean, dad, that challenge just like a moment ago to pray for their children. And we should; we must. But let me just coach you up a little bit. Children, you need to be praying for your dads and your moms, of course. Are you praying for your dad? You may not realize some of the things that he's dealing with or going through, or the struggles that he's facing, and you need to know that your dad is a man. He's a man's man; he's God's man.

You know, you can be born a male and not be a man. And you can be a man and not be a godly man. So pray that your dad would be not just a man, not just a male, but would be a godly man. Pray for a godly father. Be protective of your children. That means setting boundaries, discipling your children, and doing everything you can to protect your children from the works of the enemy. That's on you and me, Dad. I would say get anything out of your house that's detrimental to your children, starting with the alcohol. Get the alcohol out of your house. It's not doing anything for you or your kids.

You say, "Well you're just an old school Baptist preacher, Jack". No, Alcohol, "strong drink is a brawler", according to the Scripture. Alcohol has many defenders, but no defense. I've been a pastor for all these years and I can't name you one good thing that alcohol has done for anybody. So if you want to protect your kids, you might just want to start there. I remember I used to hear my pastor, Fred Swank, say, "I'd just soon have a rattlesnake in my refrigerator as alcohol". And I say Amen. Be positive with your kids.

Ephesians 6:4 says, "Don't provoke or exasperate your children". What that means is, Dad, sometimes, especially over achieving dads, we can be demanding of our kids and domineering. So don't exasperate your children. Love them. Everyone needs affirmation. Everyone needs encouragement. Everyone needs approval. Everyone needs support. So stay steady.

I remember hearing about a guy who's walking down the street with a baby stroller, with a baby just going crazy crying and squalling and just throwing a fit, and the man standing there going "Easy Albert, easy, easy. Albert, easy". And someone walked up and said, "Man, you've been so patient with that child". Said, "What do you mean"? Said, "Well when you were saying easy to Albert". He said, "No you don't understand. I'm Albert. He's Ben. Easy, Albert". Be persistent. Stay in there. Hang in there and don't quit. You never stop. You never, ever stop being a parent, do you? You never stop loving your children. And you're a lifetime, you're a lifer when it comes to being a dad or being a mom.

In his book, The Tender Warrior, and I close with this, Stu Weber writes these words: "Fathers and husbands need to learn faithfulness. Stand by your promises. Never, never let go. No matter what. When marriage isn't fun, stay in it. When work is crushing your spirit, don't let it beat you. When the local church is overwhelmed with pettiness (or I might say scandal), stay by it. When your children let you down, pick them up. When your wife goes through a six-month mood swing, live with it. After all, she lives with you. When it's fourth and 14, and no time on the clock, throw another pass. Stay with it. Be the man. Be faithful. Understand that the heart of staying power is sacrifice. Give oneself up for the good of another. For the ultimate example of staying power, our eyes only have to look to the Lord Jesus Christ. When He could have turned away from the cross, He stayed the course, setting His face like a flint all the way to Calvary. When He could have come down from the cross and sidestepped the suffering, He stayed. When He could have summoned armies of angels to deliver Him and call down divine airstrikes on the adversaries, He stayed. He persevered, and He stayed under all the way until the moment came when He could cry out, It is finished"!

Aren't you glad that He stayed? He stayed. And because of Christ, you can, too. You can stay with it; you can be faithful. So who can find a faithful man? God is looking His eyes to and from, throughout the whole earth, here and here and here and here and everywhere you are. For the man, the woman whose heart is blameless, steadfast towards Him. And God will find you. If you think you're just out there alone on an island trying to get this done. No, God will strongly support you in this. So be the dad, be the man of character that God made you to be. It's never too late. Some of you might be thinking I've already blown it as a dad. I've already messed up. My life is too far gone. No, it's never, as long as the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, as long as there is a cross and a resurrection, it's never too late for you. And you can come to the Lord today. And so we say, come to Jesus.