Bill Johnson - Stewarding an Awareness of the Presence of God
I’ve had certain things happen to me through the years when I became unusually aware of Him, who is both terrifying and wonderful at the same time, and I don’t want to live any other way. Heightened awareness is not imaginary; it’s like Jacob said when he woke up from that dream: «God is here, and I didn’t even know it.» Suddenly heightened awareness reveals a reality that existed before he was aware. A Catholic priest from many years ago, Father Lawrence, wrote a book called «Practicing the Presence,» and his whole ambition was to stay conscious of God 24/7. He never claimed to have arrived, but his point was that whether he was washing pots and pans or in the prayer house praying, his awareness of the presence didn’t change.
There’s something about the presence; if you can look at it this way, there’s nothing in heaven that is separate from the presence of God. Yes, so in essence, God Himself is the person of Heaven, and we are seated in Christ. It is a foretaste of eternity. I’m not saying He leaves us or that we leave Him; I’m just saying there are times when my affections and thoughts are anchored in things that are very inferior. That doesn’t mean He’s left me; it just means that all the things I am born for feel out of reach in this moment until I repent and deal with these wayward thoughts and affections. Stepping back into that place is not about guilt and shame—those feelings won’t get me there. In fact, I had a thought this past week that I need to work on: we experience guilt and shame in the same measure that we overemphasize our role in our own conversion. We are susceptible to guilt and shame in the same way that we overemphasize our role in our own conversion.
Well, «I found God,» you say? Yeah, but you actually didn’t. He found you first. «But I put my faith in Christ.» That’s right, but He gave you the faith to believe. The Stager said, «He called my name. I responded to His invitation. He initiated.» I love God; yes, I do, but He loved me first. Anytime we overemphasize our role in this equation, we are much more susceptible to guilt and shame because it’s a product of not being enough or doing enough.
This may sound kind of dumb, but I wish we were just known as the Church of the Burning Hearts. You know, it’s a silly name, but I really like the meaning. I’m already in trouble; I don’t want to change anything—Burning Hearts. The burning ones, the people who know how to remain in that place of deep affection. I remember how many of you recall the energy crisis of the '70s, with the long gas lines. Well, before that, I remember listening to a man speak. His home had a master bedroom on the second floor, and he said it took forever to get hot water from the downstairs hot water heater up to their bathroom. So, he finally learned to turn the hot water on just a little bit right before going to bed, allowing it to constantly trickle all night long so when he got up in the morning, he could just turn on the tap and have hot water instantly. That’s what a Burning Heart of affection is like. You don’t have to work your way into the presence to pray effective prayers; you’re already there. Why? Because you carry a Burning Heart of affection.
There’s this continuous stream of presence, a continuous stream of being one who burns for the Lord. It’s not a works thing, although works come from it; it’s not a performance thing. It’s not just about singing the right songs and all that; it’s just being conscious. You can do that for a week, and when you miss a day, you’re homesick. That’s all I know to say: you can tell because things aren’t as clear in your mind, things aren’t as clear in your heart, and your understanding of Scripture is not as sharp. Why? Because it’s not something you did wrong; it’s not punishment. It’s not sin; it’s just that we were born for the glory; we were born for heaven. That’s what we’re designed for.
There’s this crazy idea that the church is made up of Marys and Marthas, and nothing would ever get done if it wasn’t for the Marthas. Remember that story? Mary sat at the feet of Jesus, while Martha was angry that Mary wasn’t helping with the work. I’ve heard people say nothing would get done if it wasn’t for the Marthas, and I’m pretty confident it was a Martha who made that up—I’m pretty confident a Martha made up that statement to justify their reasoning for making sandwiches.
Something happens in the glory, and this is absolutely true: in the glory, things happen at such a higher level, pace, and greater efficiency that you get done in one hour what might have taken days otherwise outside of the glory. There’s something about being a people who cultivate awareness of this glorious presence that changes everything. I know of situations when the glory has shown up due to the affection and adoration of worshipers, where that affection just crashes in around a crowd of people who are literally surrounded by their enemies. They are there to kill them, and then that glory comes because there are yielded, surrendered hearts of lovers of God. The glory comes, and this army that surrounds them falls on their faces. Every one of them gets up born again, healed, and speaking in tongues. Why? Because something happened.
They could preach for 20 years and not get that conclusion, but when the presence comes, everything changes. The ambition should be the ambition of the Burning Heart, the Church of the Burning Hearts—changing the name right here, right now. That’s just between you and me: the Church of the Burning Hearts. Something happens in the hearts of those who anchor themselves in that glorious presence.
I want to read a couple of verses and then wrap this up. Open to Matthew 14. I’ve literally got just a couple of minutes, but all right, Matthew 14. It might be good to take a look at what impresses Jesus. Do you remember the story of the centurion in the Bible? He had such a clear understanding of Kingdom authority and unusual faith that Jesus stopped in His tracks and acknowledged his wisdom and faith.
Remember the Syrophoenician woman who refused to be offended by Jesus’s comment that He couldn’t give the children’s bread to dogs? She overcame the offense and stepped into great faith. Jesus stopped and acknowledged that faith. Do you remember when Jesus was ascending to the Father after His resurrection? He saw Mary, out of whom seven demons had been cast, at the tomb weeping, and He was so moved by her love that He stopped the procession and communicated with her for moments before He went to the Father. What moved Him? That love.
When John the Baptist was killed, it says in Chapter 14 of Matthew that Herod had John beheaded in prison. His disciples came, took away the body, buried it, and went and told Jesus. Look at the next phrase: when Jesus heard it, He departed from there by a boat to a deserted place. We don’t know what Jesus is processing, but we do know He had the same emotional framework that we have. The Bible says He was tempted in all points as we are, yet without sin. So, there must have been some sort of emotional or mental challenge to this, seeing this man that He had praised three chapters earlier as the greatest prophet, greater than all of them in the Old Testament. He acknowledges his significance, and now he hears that John the Baptist has been beheaded.
It was so challenging that Jesus, the Son of God, sought a place to get by Himself. The very next scene, He’s with a multitude, and He multiplies the food. What does He do after that? It says in verse 23 that when He sent the multitude away, He went up on a mountain by Himself to pray. What’s the point? In crisis, get along with God. In victory, get alone with God. The very next story says everyone who came to Jesus and was able to touch His clothing was healed.
The last verse of this chapter—what’s the point? Stewarding our moments. We all know how to pray when we’re in trouble; we pray instinctively when there’s a problem. People who don’t believe in God pray instinctively when there’s a problem. But not all of us get alone after a great victory, and it’s in those moments that the metal we are made of is formed. Great breakthroughs came following that second time praying. Get along with God when there’s victory.
In that moment, everyone who just touches His clothes is healed. It was such an extraordinary anointing that anyone who just bumped against Him had access to a miracle. It followed not prayer in trouble; it followed prayer in victory. I believe this heart of adoration that the Lord is wanting to impart for us today as a church family is significant. I know I’ve referenced this for years, so I understand it’s not new, but I do believe there’s an impartation today.
I believe He brought this to my mind because in declaring it, there would be burning hearts all over this room that would find it easy to turn affection towards Him, to anchor into that place of glory and presence, and from that place, see effective prayers. I want to shape the course of history with my prayers like you do, but sometimes the strength of our prayer is actually determined by the place from which we pray.
So Father, my cry for us as a church family is that you would impart grace for this. That we would find our hearts burning for You at the most unusual and sometimes awkward times—sitting on the plane, in the hotel, at our neighbor’s home, or driving to get groceries—that we would be a people who just know how to cultivate the Burning Heart of affection that refuses to be offended and embraces resentment—just Teflon people because our hearts are burning for You. Nothing sticks; nothing inferior sticks to a Burning Heart. God, I pray that You impart this grace to us today.
Psalm 91, verse 1: He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, «He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in Him I will trust.» Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the perilous pestilence. He shall cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you shall take refuge. His truth shall be your shield and buckler. You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, nor of the arrow that flies by day, nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness, nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday. A thousand may fall at your side and ten thousand at your right hand, but it shall not come near you. Only with your eyes shall you look and see the reward of the wicked.
Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge, even the Most High, your dwelling place, no evil shall befall you, nor shall any plague come near your dwelling, for He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways. In their hands, they shall bear you up, lest you dash your foot against a stone. You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra, the young lion and the serpent; you shall trample underfoot. Because He has set His love upon me, therefore I will deliver him; I will set him on high because he has known my name. He shall call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble. I will deliver him and honor him. With long life, I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.
This is a wonderfully well-known Psalm because of its elements of safety, protection, and vindication. I want us to go through this because I believe there are specific things the Lord would want us to take hold of today, especially in light of what is going on all over the world. Today is supposed to be the day we start the revival series; I am—but we are going to restart. This is what I’m doing—this is just Revival-flavored antivirus software.
So, «He who dwells"—first verse. We’re going to go through verse by verse, so please follow with me in your Bibles. «He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.» Stop right there. He who dwells—you remember the Scripture talks about abiding in Christ? If we abide in Him, His words abide in us. When it talks about dwelling in the shelter of the Almighty, we’re not talking about a point of theology; we’re talking about a lifestyle. In other words, it’s not just a verse you’ve memorized; it’s supposed to develop into an ongoing lifestyle of consciousness—an awareness of the abiding presence of the Holy Spirit.
Many people stop short of a divine encounter because they’re satisfied with good theology. The Word is the invitation to meet the person; this is not supposed to be just a verse I quote. That’s valuable, but it’s supposed to be the endeavor of my heart to discover the manifested presence of God upon me as a surrendered son, upon me as a yielded vessel. He says, «He who dwells in the shelter of the Almighty shall abide under the shadow of His wings.» The shadow of the Almighty—while the shadow is dark, I’ll never forget my grandmother, my mom’s mom. She was losing her eyesight, and many of us would take turns reading Scripture to her. She would memorize entire Psalms, and my uncle would memorize books of the Bible; they were into that memory thing, which becomes contagious after a while, you know?
I remember she wanted me to read her a particular book by Corrie ten Boom, and in that book, as I recall, she talked about dwelling under the shadow of the Almighty. She made a statement I’ve never been able to shake: sometimes it’s dark because He’s so close. Sometimes His nearness causes things to become out of focus—that shadow of presence. Sometimes we mistake the moment we’re in through natural interpretation instead of the realization of what Scripture says: you’re in the shadow of the Almighty. So, the people who turn their affection towards the ongoing manifestation of the abiding presence of the Spirit of God dwell in a habitation that even when it’s dark, it’s only a testimony of His nearness.
I just read a story, either this morning or last night, about Dr. Charles Price. He was an extraordinary man, a pastor in Lodi, California, and a great orator. He initially preached against miracles and all the things going on, even against Aimee Semple McPherson. He once snuck into one of her meetings to gather information to expose her as a fraud. Someone recognized him—did he have one of those big rubber noses and mustaches? I don’t know. He was trying to hide in the back, and someone recognized him and went to tell her. She stood up and said, «We are so honored today; I understand that Dr. Charles Price is in the room.»
Here’s this guy who preaches against her, and she just wants to celebrate him, and he’s embarrassed to tears. Someone spots him, leads him to the platform, and he ends up getting whacked by God, laid out under the piano, and later becomes a Mighty Man of Faith. He wrote perhaps the greatest book about faith you’ll ever read, called «Real Faith.»
In one of his healing crusades, the miracles that happened were absolutely astounding. If you’ve ever been in these meetings, you pour out your life, pray for hours, and there’s an exhaustion that, if you haven’t done it, you don’t comprehend. He reached a point when a woman approached him, asking if he could come and pray for a relative or friend who was dying in the hospital. But typically, that’s not something you can do; assessments for timing just don’t exist. Yet he stopped for a moment and said, «Yes, I’ll come,» and he told them she would be healed.
He continued, saying, «I’ve come to recognize when I stop for a moment, the Spirit of God, His presence and power, come upon me, and I know that was the witness.» He wasn’t just making things up; he recognized the tangible presence. So, the point being, you have to know how He manifests to you. William Branham had a certain thing that would happen to him; Oral Roberts had something too—his hand, if I recall, was a significant sign. Demonized people wouldn’t come near his right side because if they touched it, demons would manifest. It’s mysterious, but you don’t try to control Him; you cooperate with Him, and that just happens to be how God uses him.
The point is everyone in this room was designed by God to recognize His voice. You are designed by God to recognize His presence. Sometimes I can physically feel when He comes upon me, but other times I recognize His presence through inspired thought. I was in a meeting a couple weeks ago during worship, and I received so much download— I haven’t experienced that level of revelation in a long time. It happened during worship, and I was overwhelmed by His presence because of inspired thought. That’s just one way He shows up, letting us know He is there, ready to do something.
For years, I would feel this fire resting on my right shoulder. I wouldn’t tell anyone about it, except for my personal staff—I had three or four people who worked for me. I would be sitting there in a car and ask them to put their hand right there, and it would be burning hot. This presence would come, and I thought it was strange. But then, I attended a banquet. I was sitting at the front table, and I kept moving my face closer to the fire, trying to understand it. When the banquet was over, someone at the table behind me said, «Do you have problems with your neck? We’d be happy to pray for you.» I started laughing. No, this one’s hard to explain.
Bob Jones once explained it to me: «That’s the dove that remains.» Remember Jesus’s baptism? When He begins to manifest in that way, it’s because He’s positioned you with confidence to do His work. What do you do when a veteran talks to you like that? You take mental notes; you don’t imagine it because you don’t want to make something up. But you do want to cooperate. God’s presence speaks often in riddles, and I’ve had great fun deciphering the mysteries of God.
Sometimes He speaks very clearly. Twice, I was woken up by His voice. There was a season where I prayed a lot about writing. I didn’t have the education to write, the training, or the confidence to try unless He told me He was in it. One night, in the middle of the night, He spoke and woke me up, saying, «Isaiah 30, verse 8.» I woke up, thought that was clear, and waited for more, but nothing else came. So, when I opened my Bible to Isaiah 30, verse 8, it says, «Now go and write.» No more excuses!
He speaks that way. I had written my first book, but my life became consumed with conferences and everything happening here. I was thrilled with what God was doing, but my schedule grew to where I was traveling 185 days a year, pastoring, dealing with the school, and everything else we do. One time, I checked into a hotel in Texas with maybe 15 or 20 students. The lady behind the counter said, «Your room is 308.» I thought, «That’s a good caliber of a rifle; my most accurate rifle is a .308.» For those of you who’re into this, 90 percent of you won’t even know the language I’m talking about, but the 10 percent of you are about to be blessed. That gun will shoot under quarter-inch groups at a hundred yards, three shots, center to center—under a quarter inch! So, when she said I had room 308, I said, «Yep, it’s a good caliber of a rifle.»
I laughed it off and went to my room. The next morning I woke up at 3:08. «Alright, what’s up?» I’ve had these things happen before, and I asked Him a question. He was silent. A few days later, I was home, in my office, and I remembered the question about writing. He told me, «Isaiah 30, verse 8,» and I just filled my calendar. There was no time to write; why does He speak in mystery? Often, it’s so you linger longer in His presence.
Why does He speak in mystery? Because He wants an exchange. He wants dialogue: «What do you mean by this? What do you want with me because of this?» He desires the sense of purpose in our embracing journey. We are not robots commanded to fulfill a commission; we are in a relational journey that requires exchange and dialogue.
Everyone in this room who is born again is here because He spoke, you listened, and responded. None of us found God; He found us, right? It’s like running from God through a forest, tripping over a rock, looking up, and seeing Him looking back at you. You say, «I’m so glad I found you!» That’s how all of us got saved. We ended up seeing that there was only one reasonable option, and that was to give ourselves to Him.
We are alive because we heard Him speak and responded. The Holy Spirit is the central person in our life. Every triumph, every victory, every enablement, every bit of grace, everything we experience in this life while following Jesus is active because the Holy Spirit lives in us. The Holy Spirit is God on Earth. Everything about our life either succeeds or fails because of a relationship with Him.
I’m not referring to an emotion, although emotions are inclusive; I’m not talking about feelings, although feelings are included. It’s a relationship with a person. This Christian life is a relational journey and a relationship with God on Earth who is the Holy Spirit, who perfectly represents Jesus and completely and perfectly manifests the will of the Father.
I’ve been fighting for an adequate illustration, and I have not yet come up with one. Maybe I will by next week when I won’t need it. Have you ever gone through life, and someone says, «Oh, what a beautiful song?» You didn’t even know a song was playing, but once they mentioned it, you could hear it. I mean, it wasn’t made up in your mind; you could hear it, but you weren’t aware.
You might just be going through life, not thinking of anything, and someone says, «Why do you smell that?» You didn’t smell it before, but as soon as they mention it, you think, «Yeah, meat!» or maybe something else. But meat primarily. Yes, barbecue—thank you, Jesus.
As soon as someone mentions it, you become aware. What I’m looking for is for us to have a heightened awareness of the presence of God. I’ve had specific experiences throughout the years that caused me to become unusually aware of Him. It’s terrifying yet wonderful all at the same time, and I don’t want to live another way. Heightened awareness is not imaginary; it’s a reality.
It’s like Jacob said when he woke up from that dream: «God is here, and I didn’t even know it.» There’s a sudden heightened awareness of a reality that existed long before he was aware. The Holy Spirit lives in you; He’s also called the Paraclete, the one called alongside to help. So, the point is, today, I’d like to help facilitate a heightened awareness of God on earth that I have actually received as a down payment of an inheritance.
I struggle with understanding how God could give us Himself as our inheritance, and the initial payment is the Holy Spirit, referred to as the down payment in Ephesians—the down payment of our inheritance. Lara Randolph made a comment years ago: «If God is as big as He says He is, He shouldn’t be that hard to find.» With someone that large in our lives, it should not be difficult to discern His presence.
If it is, I must have my heart and mind anchored in things that are inferior, deadening what He has created in me as a capacity to recognize Him. This concept has been real to me for nearly 20 years, but I feel like I’ve just scratched the surface. I ache for what Jesus taught—I ache for the ascended lifestyle, living in that place of fellowship with Him. It’s not an ecstatic emotional journey; it’s a part of our journey where He lets us see through His eyes and feel what He feels in His heart.
We become so one with Him that He can trust us to ask anything. I don’t want to have my way with God where He does whatever I want; that’s terrifying. I don’t want that. But I am interested in being the fulfillment of His dream. He designed it so we can live in the felt realization of His presence and host His word in our soul as the greatest of treasures. The end result is that things would happen—not out of self-gratification but because of His delight over us. His delight in us pales by comparison to everything else.
You’re here on a Sunday night because, in some measure, you ache for this as much as I do. We’re not just trying to spend time; we don’t need any more meetings. We’re looking for the reality of Christ, that which He has destined us for, to become a felt reality and an actual part of our lives.