Allen Jackson - A Celebration of Life - Part 1
Nah, it’s Mother’s Day and I think it’s appropriate to try to glean a bit of a biblical perspective around that. This one’s a bit more personal to me. It’s the first Mother’s Day since my mom went to heaven. Oh, yay God. Her gain, our loss. And I’m determined to celebrate her gain, amen. So if I reference her during the course of this and I’m sure I will, I need this disclaimer on the front. I’m very clear she was not a saint. I knew my mom BC. Most of y’all didn’t. And the transformation in she and my father was so dramatic when they came to know Jesus in a personal way. We were churched. We went to church every week. But we weren’t Christians. You know, you can do that. You can do that here. But when they had a personal encounter with Jesus, there was such a transformation in their lives that I walked into the kitchen and said, «What’s happened»?
And I was 8 or 9 years old. That’s not a normal question for a boy at that age. There was a real transformation in their lives and I continued, I had the privilege, I became a Christian not long after that and I watched God bring change in our lives, and he still is. And that’s the invitation I would give to you today. We need men and women who have not checked a box that says, «I’m Christian,» as opposed to Muslim or agnostic. We need people who are being transformed by the power of the living God on a daily basis. Haven’t coughed all day. You know, I suppose many of you know the story. My mom was healed when I was a boy. The doctors gave her a few months to live. And she prayed. Not to be healed, she just prayed to know the truth.
And God really, in an act of his sovereign grace, intervened and brought health to my mom’s body. She lived more than 50 years longer than the doctor said she could. My takeaway from that wasn’t very complicated because it impacted my life as a boy and it changed my life, I’m quite certain, but was that God can, and you can fill in the blank. God can heal a body. Doesn’t mean he heals everyone I pray for, but I’m not particularly open to people saying that God doesn’t do that because my life was changed when God did. You know, I’ve been in some very fine academic institutions with some very well-trained professors who were very adamant that healing ended at the end of the first century and I’m going, «Well, not completely».
It is not theoretical to me. God can. He can change a life. He can heal a body. He can show mercy to someone who’s pagans because we were. It wasn’t because we knew the right prayer to play. We didn’t know the right response. We didn’t know. We just didn’t know and I’m quite confident our behavior didn’t justify it. It was an expression of God’s mercy. And if you ask me for one statement to help define the ministry that I’ve been involved with all these years, it’s that God can. We wanna be guilty of inviting God in the midst of people’s lives to do those things that only God can do. You know, I like to learn, I like to study. I encourage you on a very regular basis to read your Bibles, to make time to do many things. But at the heart of all of that is this conviction that God can.
And whatever you bring to the Lord, if you’ll keep seeking him, he will show you ways through. I have lived it out, doesn’t mean I always get the answer I want in the time I want it, or the outcome in the way I imagined it, but God can change a life. I think the notion that this biblical notion of family, of men and husbands and fathers, of women as wives and mothers, the family and the children are notions that are considered antiquated, a little out of date. They’re not really chic anymore. You know, you’re far more chic or courageous if you say they’re confusing.
Well, I don’t believe those are things we should be confused about. I don’t find them to be confusing at all, but I’m gonna start with children. Because I think we all need to understand that children is not defined by our age. It signifies a relationship. You know, I’m still a child, not by age any longer. But I’m the child of someone. But I think we think of children only in terms of little people. And the reality is all of us stand in that role as a child. If we got here, we had to have parents. It’s a sovereign expression of God. We don’t choose our parents, any more than parents choose their children. There are characteristics and gifts. Some are shared by DNA and some I think are inexplicable, other than Almighty God.
You know, lots of debates around whether it’s nature or nurture and you watch family systems very long and you’ll go, «Yeah, there’s some other things too». God’s involved in this. Proverbs 23 and verse 25 says, «May your father and mother be glad; may she who gave you birth rejoice»! Biblically, it’s very clear, we are given by God a responsibility towards parents, as children. We’re told to honor our father and mother. When Jesus quoted it, he added a penalty to that. Not just that we would have a long life and be blessed, but that there we’d be penalized if we failed to do that. We have a responsibility before God towards our parents. It comes with a kingdom opportunity.
There are rewards offered, but there’s also punishment if we neglect it. So this isn’t an optional kind of a thing, and we think about our families and our relationships, every family faces challenges. The ones that you think are perfect, you just don’t know well enough. I didn’t accuse you or your family. I don’t know you well enough. But one of the challenges is to keep short accounts, and this really isn’t that complicated. There’s some simple things we can do. I don’t like, you know, the things that I can truly understand, I can explain to a third grader. And you can always know, if I’m using, the bigger the words I use, the less I understand the topic. And so this one to me is not particularly complicated. If we’re gonna honor our father and mother, we have to learn to bless them. You can do it with your words, you do it with your attitude, you can do it with your posture.
Proverbs 20:20 said, «If a man curses his father or mother, his lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness». That’s pretty plain, folks. There are no perfect parents. Some are even evil. I meet children, I meet adults who have suffered greatly at the hand of parents who were wicked. And I’m not suggesting that blessing your parents means you should get back in line for further abuse or you should deny the mistreatment that you received. I’m simply saying that once you can acknowledge the reality of that, it’s still possible to acknowledge that your parents gave you life.
And the good news is most of us did not come from family systems that were evil. And there are things for which we can bless our parents. The circumstances of our birth are beyond us, but you and I can make a decision to bless our parents. And I will couple that with another response that’s equally necessary in every family system, we have to forgive. Proverbs 10:1 says, «A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish son grief to his mother». Whether you are wise or foolish can be displayed in the emotions that you bring to the home where you were. It’s not about your opinion or your pronouncements or the degrees that you earn. It’s about the impact you have on the lives of people who’ve made a sacrifice for you to have an opportunity. And we have to be willing to forgive.
Forgiveness is not an emotion. It’s not based on outcomes. We don’t forgive because someone apologizes. Forgiveness is a decision. It’s something self-initiated, it’s a choice we make. You see, as we make our way through life, there are times the responses towards us are not appropriate. And the perception, the reality is, there’s some sort of an injury, emotionally, physically, whatever it may be, and as a result of that, there’s a debt that’s established. We feel like we’re owed something, restitution, restoration, an apology. And when we hold unforgiveness or resentment or bitterness, we’re waiting for the debt to be paid. It’s like a marker. It’s like you’ve got a chip and I’m not releasing the chip until there’s something done. And forgiveness says I’m gonna tear up the marker. I’m not saying the event didn’t happen. I’m not saying you couldn’t have done better. I’m not saying what was done was appropriate. I’m saying I’m choosing not to carry the marker any longer. I’m gonna lay it down.
Now here’s the challenge in that. The biblical prescription is that in order for us to be forgiven, we have to forgive. And all of us need forgiveness. None of us make the journey through time without mistakes. And so the ability to practice forgiveness, to keep these accounts short, to allow the words you use towards the people closest to you to be words of blessing and to refuse to carry resentment and anger and bitterness. You can do that and you can change the trajectory of your life and bring the blessings of God, or you can reject it and you’ll bring a whole different set of consequences. You’ll never make a case so compelling that you’ll cause God to agree with you in your ungodliness.
And so as we walk towards this notion of Mother’s Day and a weekend where we stop to consider our families for a bit, I want to give you the invitation and the opportunity to do both of these things, to bless your parents, your mother specifically, and to be certain that the accounts are short and that you have forgiven what needs to be forgiven. And if your parents have stepped out of time into eternity, you can still be carrying things that you need to forgive. There’s no statute of limitations on unforgiveness or bitterness or hatred or resentment. Please don’t carry those things forward. I saw a little chart. I thought it was worth sharing about our relationships with our moms.
Says when you’re 4 years of age, your mommy can do anything. At 8 years old, my mom knows a lot, a whole lot. At 12 years of age, my mother doesn’t really know quite everything. At 16, naturally, mother doesn’t know that either. At 18, that old woman is clueless. At 25, well, she might know a little bit about it. At 35, before we decide, I wonder if we could get Mom’s opinion. At 45 years of age, I wonder what mom would have thought about that. And at 65, I wish I could talk it over with Mom. You know, this notion of being a mom is so deeply embedded in Scripture that it’s difficult to understand how we’ve arrived at the place that we are without almost the complete capitulation of the church. But I thought I would start with Mary, the mom that was recruited for Jesus.
Are you ever intimidated by God assignment? I am. You know, I don’t think usually they show up with, like, a neon light that says, «This is a God assignment for you». But maybe you know, you’re at work and he gives you some new coworker or an assignment with somebody for a season and they’re really difficult. And you’d just rather not have to deal with them. And then you realize that perhaps it’s a God assignment. And I think, «Ah, couldn’t I have had somebody easy»? Because once those circumstances that are uncomfortable or problematic or once they’re cast in the light of perhaps it’s a God assignment, it brings a whole new meaning to it and now the fact that it’s challenging or difficult isn’t something to be complained about, it’s an expression of trust. You’ve been trusted with a difficult assignment.
Well, I think Mary is a classic example of that. As a teenager, she’s recruited to give birth to Jesus, and it completely disrupts her life forever. Well, I mean, I know you could say on the backside, «Oh, it was wonderful and it’s a blessing,» but in real time, it was just a pain. It brought shame. It brought a lot of commentary no one would like to have. It wasn’t easy. But in Luke chapter 1 and verse 31, this was the announcement that Mary received, «You’ll be with child and give birth to a son, and you’re to give him the name Jesus». It’s a birth announcement. We do those a lot.
Now we do it with social media or digitally, and they go viral. You can share them easily, but this one fascinates me. The birth announcement that God delivered with an archangel, even the name of the child was included. «You’re gonna be with child. You’re gonna give birth to a son». Conception hasn’t taken place yet. «You’re gonna be with child. You’ll give birth to a son, and his name is Jesus». You see, I think we labor under a mistaken notion from a biblical vantage point, children aren’t ours. Oh, we share some genetic material. And we’re given an assignment as a parent, but God is the author of life. And he knows those children, the Scripture’s very clear, before we ever see them or before we hear them utter their first cry. And that is evidenced in this birth announcement to Mary. «You’ll be with child, you’ll give birth to a son, and you’re gonna name him Jesus». They’re a sacred trust to be cherished and prepared and released.
Now, most of you aren’t raising Messiahs. Probably a little more devilment in the house. But they’re a sacred trust to be cherished, prepared, and released. Children make very poor idols. Mothers choose the gift of birth. I don’t wanna miss that. Because that message is largely lost in our culture. We talk in terms of choices. And from that the discussion ratchets up so quickly with so much emotion and so much animation and so many facts. But from a biblical standpoint, the simplest presentations we have are you’ll be with child and you’ll give birth to a son. It’s clear the choice to give birth to that child is very similar to the choice of what you’ll name him. Moms choose to give birth. And I would submit that if you’ve been pregnant and chosen other than the gift of birth, that there’s forgiveness there too. That you can move forward.
In fact, I think Mother’s Day is a good day to take just a minute with that. You know, we are several decades into this discussion about the sanctity of human life and how we view it, and 60 million children is a conservative number that have been lost. Every family has been touched directly or indirectly. Our nation would be a different place, a dramatically different place. And I’m not interested in igniting the debate and the argument. I’m more interested, for the moment, in just staying in the simple presentation of Scripture. And because of how widespread that is, I think there is a candor that we need to take a step towards for just a moment. The temptation is to wanna live through things, live through the seasons of our lives that weren’t godly.
Just to live through those hard times just like if you’re walking through the valley of the shadow of death, just hurry. But the message is that when you’re walking through that valley, the only way really to flourish in that valley is to understand who your protector is, not just to hurry. In those seasons in our lives where those very difficult decisions have been made, usually there’s an anxiousness just to get to the other side and then to do our best not to talk about it. But keeping those things buried is like carrying unforgiveness. It’s a weight, it’s a burden, it’s a handicap. And I think it’s appropriate this weekend to take a moment and just the biblical prescription for when we find ourselves engaged in something ungodly isn’t to deny it or to justify it or to explain it or to blame it on someone else or the circumstances were really difficult.
The biblical prescription is repentance. It has a technical meaning and really it’s twofold. It means we change how we think. We made an ungodly choice and we thought it was okay, we thought we could get away with it. We thought we could overcome it. We thought there’d be no consequence. And the reality is there is always a consequence for ungodliness. So our thought was wrong, and our bad thought led us to bad behavior. So repentance says, «God, I’m sorry my thinking was wrong. And because my thinking was wrong my behavior was wrong. And I’m sorry. And I ask you to forgive me». And I think it’s appropriate, not just for ourselves, but to have that tool in your own tool kit to help other people.
Stop shouting at people, and extend to them the grace and the mercy of God to change our lives. I’m gonna say a little prayer. I’m not gonna ask you to stand. I’m gonna stay seated with you. But in those places, and this isn’t just for the women, fellas. I’m pretty sure there wouldn’t be those crisis pregnancies unless there were men involved. And we’ve lived through way too much ungodliness without ever stopping to clean it up. And if we’re really gonna have the kind of breakthroughs that we need to secure the futures for our children and grandchildren, we’re gonna have to do more than live through our sin. We’re gonna have to be repentant. «Well, it was a hard time». Okay. «There weren’t good choices». Understood. We still made bad ones.
So I’m gonna say a prayer and to the degree that’s touched your life, maybe it’s something that you have already presented to the Lord and you’ve already worked through. I don’t think it’s a bad idea. I don’t think it’s unhealthy or unhelpful to simply say to the Holy Spirit, if there’s anything there. And there’s some ways you can recognize that the conversation makes you uncomfortable. The memory of the individuals involved triggers all sorts of emotional responses, from anger to resentment to grief. We need to be forgiven and we need to forgive. Can we do that? You just bow with me in prayer for a moment?
Heavenly Father, I thank you that you’re the author of life. Or that there’s no child hidden from you. That you know us and we’re knit together in our mother’s wombs, that those lives are a gift that begin with you and then are entrusted to us for a short season. And Lord, our lives have coincided with a cheapening of life. Lord, we have seen millions of children sacrificed for convenience. Oh Lord, we come today not to point an accusing finger at someone else, but to acknowledge our own complicitness in this. Forgive us. Forgive us when we’ve set your boundaries aside. Forgive us when we have been casual with things that we should not have been casual with. Forgive us for our disobedience.
Lord, we ask for your mercy in our lives. And we forgive those who we feel like betrayed us or let us down or disappointed us. Lord, we release them. We cancel the marker. And I thank you now that through the blood of Jesus, you will cleanse us, redeem us, sanctify us, justify us. Lord, you paid a tremendous price that we could be clean. So we choose not to treat it casually or flippantly, but to recognize it took the life of your Son that our lives might be clean. And now by faith we receive that forgiveness. And I thank you for the good things you have for us, for the freedom that awaits us, in Jesus’s name, amen.
Lord, we ask for your mercy in our lives. And we forgive those who we feel like betrayed us or let us down or disappointed us. Lord, we release them. We cancel the marker. And I thank you now that through the blood of Jesus, you will cleanse us, redeem us, sanctify us, justify us. Lord, you paid a tremendous price that we could be clean. So we choose not to treat it casually or flippantly, but to recognize it took the life of your Son that our lives might be clean. And now by faith we receive that forgiveness. And I thank you for the good things you have for us, for the freedom that awaits us, in Jesus’s name, amen.
How about just a big deep breath? You know, sometimes we carry that stuff a long time. And it’s not something you earn, but it’s not a simple thing to lay down a burden, an emotion, that you have carried for decades and decades. And the fact that you’ve buried it in the past or hidden it from the video, there’s a freedom that’s available to us.