Adrian Rogers - Family Finances (08/13/2023)
In 1 Timothy 6, the preacher warns families against financial bondage from debt, discontent, and the love of money, which pierces with many sorrows. True contentment comes from godliness rather than wealth—since we brought nothing into the world and take nothing out—while the rich bear responsibility to be humble, trust God, enjoy His gifts, and be generous in good works, storing eternal treasure instead of chasing uncertain riches that fly away.
Signs of Financial Bondage in Families
Would you take your Bibles and turn to Matthew chapter 19. We're going to be talking about family faithfulness, keeping love alive. I asked Joyce, "Will you love me, Joyce, when I'm old and unattractive"? She said, "Of course I do"! Ha, ha. We want to keep love alive. You know, there's something very sad in today's world and what it is, is this; we have so many who have what I call just throw away marriages. It just doesn't work out, so they just throw it away! As somebody said, "They get married as an ideal. Then that ideal turns to an ordeal, and then they're looking around for a new deal". That's sad, that's sad.
I can remember when families really were traditional. I came from a traditional family, I married a girl who came from a traditional family, mothers took care of the home, fathers went off to work, we ate our meals together, we went to church together, we fussed together, we played together, we were a traditional family. That's not true anymore. The typical family in America, in the typical family, both husband and wife work. And millions of households have not a father and mother, but a single parent. And experts tell us, in the coming years half of all children will grow up in homes with a single parent and most mothers will work outside the home. Now, a lot of this is caused by divorce and I was read in Newsweek Magazine, listen to this. "The landscape is littered with victims of the divorce epidemic".
Notice this is not some Baptist preacher, but it's Newsweek talking about a divorce epidemic. "Ex wives raising their children alone, former husbands trying to start new lives and still be good fathers to kids they see only on specified days, and the children themselves often torn between two warring parents". Newsweek went on to say about a study of sixty divorced middle class families in northern California. There was a psychologist, her name is Judith Wallerstein, and she found out of these sixty couples, only 10% of the ex spouses said they had succeeded in improving their lives. Only 10% said, "This divorce made things better". And then she went on to say, Wallerstein says this, "Divorce is seen as a wrenching experience for every family I have seen".
And of course we know that the devastating effect on the children, broken homes produce broken lives which produce broken homes which produce broken lives, and on and on it goes. No wonder God says in the book of Malachi chapter 2 and verse 16, "I hate divorce". That's what God says, God says, "I hate it". Now we have the sophisticated, the intellectuals of today, who'll tell us, "Well, we've come way past, Adrian, what you believe in and what you Christians believe in". So we're being told today that sex between unmarried couples is normal and acceptable; we're told that homosexuality is just an alternate lifestyle; we're told that unmarried motherhood has no great shame to it; we're told that marriage is not sacred because nothing is sacred. And the only law today in America, the chief code in America is, "Don't be judgmental". That's the way we live today.
Money as a Root of Family Problems
Well, let's see what God's Word has to say. Matthew chapter 19, beginning in verse 1 through verse 9, "And it came to pass when Jesus had finished these sayings, He departed from Galilee and came into the coast of Judea beyond Jordan, and great multitudes followed Him and He healed them. And the Pharisees also came unto Him, tempting Him," that means testing Him, "and saying unto Him, 'Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?'" That is, if she's not attractive or if she cannot cook or if she has mismanaged the finances, or if she's irritable, can I just put her away? "And He answered and said unto them, 'Have ye not read,'" and by the way, Jesus expects you to read the Bible, my friend, "'Have ye not read that He which made them at the beginning made them male and female.'"
And let me say this; one of the most damning things today that the devil has done is to blur the distinction between male and female. "He made them male and female and said, 'For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and they twain,'" that is, they two, "'shall be one flesh. Wherefore they are no more twain but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.' They say unto Him, 'Why did Moses, then, command to give a writing of divorcement and to put her away?' He saith unto them, 'Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, suffered you,'" or allowed you, "'to put away your wives, but from the beginning it was not so, and I say unto you that whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication,'" that means sexual immorality, "'and shall marry another committeth adultery, and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.'"
Taking the Financial Bondage Test
Would you take your Bibles and turn to First Timothy chapter 6, and when you’ve found it, let me talk to you a little bit about your family and the finances of your family. I can say without a shadow of a doubt or equivocation that money is a root of all kinds of family problems. «Theirs was a perfect marriage, but for one feminine flaw. He was quick on the deposit, but she was faster on the draw». Now, that happens many times in marriages and sometimes, however, it is not the woman who is the spendthrift, it is the man. Many families, many families, many of our best families, are in financial bondage. Would you like to take a little test before we get into the Word of God and find out whether or not you are in financial bondage? Just begin to count and see how many of these eleven factors are true in your life.
Factor number one: find out whether or not you are charging daily expenditures because of a lack of funds. Factor number two: have you put off paying a bill that is due until next month? Factor number three: do you borrow to pay fixed expenses such as taxes or insurance? Factor number four: does your annual debt retirement on a long term debt exceed 20% of your annual income? Next: are you even unaware of how much you owe? Next: are creditors and bill collectors writing you about past due bills? Next: are you having to take from savings to pay current bills? Next: are you making new loans to pay off old loans? Next: have you even thought about being dishonest concerning money? Next: are you having difficulty returning your tithe to Almighty God? Next: do you and your wife ever argue over money?
What God's Word Says About Contentment
Well, let’s look in the Word of God here. First Timothy chapter 6 and I’m going to break into a thought in verse 5 and read through verse 10, «Perverse disputings of men of corrupt minds and destitute of the truth, supposing that gain is godliness. From such, withdraw thyself, but godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world and it is certain that we can carry nothing out. And having food and raiment,» boys and girls, that means food and clothes, «let us therewith be content. But they that will be rich,» that is, they who determine to be rich, «fall into temptation and a snare and into many foolish and hurtful lusts which drowned men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is the root of all evil which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith and pierced themselves through with many sorrows».
And then, go down to verse 17, «Charge them that are rich in this world that they be not high minded nor trust in uncertain riches, but in the living God who giveth us richly all things to enjoy, that they do good and that they be rich in good works, ready to distribute, willing to communicate, laying up in store for themselves a good foundation against the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life». Now, it is the devil’s plan to keep families in financial bondage. And we’re going to look right here in the Word of God and find out what God’s Word has to say about your money problems.
You say, «Pastor, mine is not a money problem, it is a lack of money problem». Well whatever kind of a problem it is, it may not be truly a lack of money problem and you think it is. Four words I want to write upon your heart: and the word lack, the word lost, the word love and the word luxury. They’re all right here. First of all, I want us to see something about the lack of wealth, the lack of wealth. And I want you to learn this: the lack of wealth, the lack of wealth cannot take away genuine contentment. Look if you will in verses 6 through 8 of this passage again, «But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into this world and it is certain that we can carry nothing out,» now watch this, «and having food and raiment,» food and clothes, «let us be content».
Learning the Difference Between Needs and Wants
Now one of the greatest things that most American families need to learn is the difference between needs and wants. Many of us have wants that are not genuine needs. Madison Avenue is built upon this premise, that they can create in us needs and desires so that we will go out and buy things. Americans want something newer, bigger, better, shinier. And so we’re constantly reading the catalogs, floating through the mall, and the people are generating in us things that we feel somehow are needs and they’re really only wants, they are not necessities. And the children have become victims of these things as they watch television, and those masterminds of Madison Avenue know how to sow seeds of discontent in the hearts and minds of our children and make them see that they will not be happy unless they have the latest product that they saw on television.
And so we have all of these perceived needs, and then on top of that, they tell us what? «You deserve it! You have earned it! You need it! And you won’t be happy without it»! And the truth of the matter is, that the desire for more and more is not making us happy, it is truly making us unhappy. And surveys of married couples find out that a major, major, major problem in homes is not sex, it is not children, it is not in laws, it is finances. But so many of our young couples today get married and they think they have to have in three years what it took their parents thirty years to accumulate. And they can go out and get it with the false god of credit.
Now the Scripture tells us here, that you only have two basic needs, food and clothes. That simplifies it, doesn’t it? I mean, that’s all you need. That’s what the Word of God says, that’s all you need, that’s all I need, is food and clothes. And the Bible says if you have that, be content. Now what is contentment? Contentment is an inner sufficiency that keeps us at peace in spite of outward circumstances. An inner sufficiency that keeps us in peace in spite of outward circumstances. Now if you depend upon natural and material things for contentment, you will never have it. Put down this verse in your margin, Ecclesiastes chapter 5 and verse 10. The Bible says, «He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver».
Now, you think if you could just get more, it would satisfy you? The Bible teaches just the opposite. Sometimes people get on a raft in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, or the Pacific Ocean, and they have not enough water, and they’re surrounded by water and they think, «Well, maybe just a little drink of salt water would be better than no water at all,» but if you drink salt water, what happens? It makes you thirstier. If you drink more you, it makes you thirstier and that’s the way material goods are. It’s like trying to satisfy your thirst with salt water.
Contentment Comes from Godliness, Not Wealth
Warren Wiersbe told of an old Quaker who was in his house and next door was a new family moving in, and they were just unloading everything that they had, you know, all the stuff that we gather, that we accumulate, and they were putting all of the toys and all of the tools and all of the finery and all of the gimmick and all of the furniture and all of these things, they were bringing it into their house. And this old Quaker was standing over there watching all of this stuff go into this house and he’d learned what the Bible says, «Having food and clothing, be content». Finally when they got it all in there, he went over there and he said, «Friend, if thou dost ever have anything that thou thinkest thou needest, come and see me, and I will tell thee how to get along without it».
Oh, friend, that’s what we need to learn, the difference between our needs and our wants. Not to want something is even better than to own it. You don’t have to take care of it. I’m telling you, there’s a false god in the land today, and that is the god of credit who will give us things that God has not necessarily supplied. Friend, I want to tell you, there is one thing that money cannot buy and that is poverty. You need credit cards for that. Did you know that a lot of people are making or looking around for a good investment? Pay off your credit card debts and you’ll be making about 20%. Where else can you get an investment like that? I mean, think about it. Why should you pay about 20% more, why should you cut your family income like that, because you carry those little credit cards? I’m not talking about for convenience; I’m talking about so you can have more.
Many of our young couples today need to learn what God’s Word says, «Food and clothes, be content». Some need to get those cards out and have a little plastic surgery. I’m very serious about that. Where is contentment found? Look in the Word of God, look at it. Young couples, look at it. Verse 6 of First Timothy chapter 6, «But godliness with contentment is great gain». Now if you are godly, you’re wealthy. Let me say this, that your personal value is revealed, not by money but by godliness; your personal value. So many times we look at a man, his stocks, bonds, real estates, cars, homes, etcetera, and we say, «Well, he’s worth this or he’s worth that». You cannot measure worth by money! Godliness is worth more than the bank account! That’s what God’s Word says.
We Brought Nothing In and Take Nothing Out
And so, when you ask, «What is an individual worth?» what an insult to Almighty God if you say, «He’s worth what he thinks he owns». If you want to know what any item is worth; do you know how to find out what an item is worth? Find out what somebody will pay for it. I don’t care how much you think you have, you think all that stuff is worth all so much, try to sell it and then you’ll know what it’s worth, what someone will pay for it. Any appraiser will tell you that; isn’t that true?
Now folks, what are you worth? Jesus died for you! You’re valuable. I mean, with His precious blood, He poured out His rich, red, royal blood for you and you are valuable, and don’t you ever, ever, ever measure your worth by your bank account. Don’t you do that! I’m telling you, friend, that your personal value is revealed by godliness. Your personal virtue is revealed by godliness. Do you think that God measures how good you are by how much money you made? That’s exactly what Paul is warning about in First Timothy 6 verse 5. There are those with perverse minds who say that, «Gain is godliness». That is, if you make a lot of money then somehow you’re more virtuous than somebody else. That is not so. Your value is not measured by your money, your virtue is not measured by your money. That’s an incorrect barometer of your worth and of your virtue.
And I’ll tell you something else, your victory is not measured by your bank account. Do you think that the most successful person’s the person that has the most money? That’s what everybody else says. «He’s successful man, she’s a successful woman. Look what he or she has accumulated». Well, I want to ask you a question: who is more successful? The rock star? Or a godly school teacher who has a meager salary? Who is more successful? Now if you tell me that the rock star is more successful, I’m going to tell you, Paul just described you in verse 5, «perverse mind». Supposing that gain is godliness, that somehow that is the blessing of God.
Success is not measured by the amount of money that you have in the bank, and I’m telling you that your value, your virtue, and your victory is not measured by money! You let people put this stuff on you, and you go around sitting in a corner perhaps, or walking with Jesus and loving God with all your heart and thinking you’re a failure, the devil told you that. The Bible says that, «Godliness with contentment is great gain». Now, you can be successful and have money and you can be successful and not have money, but success is not measured by wealth or poverty, it is measured by godliness. But folks, I want you to listen to me: if your desire, if your burning goal, if the thing that consumes you is to be rich, then you’re headed for trouble, if that is your priority. And many people who desire to be rich become victims of get rich quick schemes.
The Bible says in Proverbs 28 and verse 20, «A faithful man shall abound with blessings, but he that maketh haste to be rich shall not be innocent». Now you say, «Well, Pastor, what is my relationship to these things»? Well, doesn’t the Bible say in Matthew 6:33 that, «Godliness with contentment is great gain»? So what therefore is my ambition? To be rich? No, it’s Matthew 6:33, «Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you».
The Inevitable Loss of Wealth
Now God knows you have need of things. God knows that you have need of food and clothing. And not only does God want you to have your needs met, but God is a good God, as we’re going to see, who’s going to give you a lot of things you don’t need just because He loves you. And God is not a God who is a cosmic killjoy, who makes you squirm like a worm in hot ashes. God is not saying that, «All I want you to have is food and clothes». That’s not what God is saying. But God is saying, «That’s all you really need; and if you have Me and food and clothes, you can be content,» that’s what He’s saying.
Now here’s the fourth and the final thing I want you to see. And we’re talking about the lack of riches, the lack of wealth that cannot take away contentment. And then He’s talking about the loss of wealth. He says, «You know, you’re going to give it all back anyway, you’re going to put it all back in the box». Then he talks about the love of wealth. He says, «If your desire is to have wealth, you’re headed for trouble». And then he talks about the luxury of wealth. Some people do have wealth. Now notice First Timothy 6 verse 17 to 19, «Charge them that are rich in this world that they be not high minded nor trust in uncertain riches but in the living God who giveth us richly all things to enjoy that they do good, that they be rich in good works, ready to distribute, willing to communicate, laying up in store for themselves a good foundation against the time to come, that they may lay hold of eternal life».
Responsibilities of Those Blessed with Wealth
Now here’s the fourth and final thing, the luxury of wealth brings responsibility. And by the way, I would say compared to most people in the world, everybody in this congregation is wealthy, compared to most of the people in the world. Now there may be some exceptions to that, but I would say by large we’re all luxuriously wealthy compared to most of the people in the world. Now let me tell you this. The word responsibility goes with the luxury of wealth. You see, we are stewards, we’re not owners. I mean, God says, «What do you have that you’ve not received»? Psalm 24:1, «The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof». All God has done is, He’s loaned it to you. God has made you a steward over it; you’re not an owner. Now if you think you’re an owner, you don’t understand the Bible.
Now let me tell you the difference between a steward and an owner. An owner has rights. A steward has responsibilities. God is the owner: He’s the one with the rights. We are the stewards, we have responsibilities. The Bible says in First Corinthians 4 verse 2, «A steward is a man who’s to be found faithful». I’ve talked to you about the financial bondage of those who don’t have much and have put themselves in debt. Did you know that you can be wealthy and be in financial bondage? Did you know that? Let me tell you about the financial bondage of the wealthy. A wealthy man is in financial bondage if he seeks satisfaction in his money. Why? Because he will never find it.
Did you know that even a poor man has an advantage over a wealthy man? At least the poor man has hope that «If I could get enough, I’d be happy». The rich man says, «I have it and I’m still not happy». He doesn’t even have the hope anymore. So there’s the financial bondage of the rich, when they seek satisfaction in their ownership. All right, I’m going to tell you again, a wealthy man is in financial bondage when his wealth increases his worries. Now you think about it, there’re people today who cannot get a good night’s sleep, not because of their poverty but because of their wealth. Proverbs 15 verse 6 says, «In the house of the righteous is much treasure, but in the revenues of the wicked is trouble».
Now, if your revenue is based somehow upon your inordinate desire to get rich, all you’ve bought for yourself is trouble, you’ve pierced yourself through with many sorrows. A rich man is in financial bondage when he becomes a slave to his money. I mean, if you’re a slave to your money, you’re still in bondage. The Bible says in Proverbs 23 verse 4, «Labor not to be rich». That is, you are a laborer, you are in bondage, money is a wonderful servant, it’s a poor master. A rich man is in bondage when he has no treasure in Heaven. Matthew 6:20, «Lay up for yourselves treasure in Heaven». A rich man is poor and in bondage if he dies a Christ-less death. Proverbs 11 and verse 4, «Riches profit not in the day of wrath».
Do you think you’re going to roll out and say, «Here God, here are a few millions, Lord, here are a few thousands. Lord God, let me on into Heaven». No. «Riches profit not in the day of wrath». So, what are the responsibilities of the luxury of wealth? Well, let’s look at them and see. The luxury of wealth brings responsibility, and he mentions four of them, and then we’ll be finished very quickly here. Number one, be humble. Notice First Timothy 6 verse 17, «Charge them that are rich in this world that they be not high minded». Hey, folks, if you’ve got more than somebody else, don’t you strut your stuff. You’re not better than somebody else because you happen to have more. Be humble. Warren Wiersbe says, «Material wealth is either a window through which we see God or a mirror in which we see ourselves».
Number two, be trustful. Again in verse 17, «Don’t trust in uncertain riches, but trust in the living God». You think you’ve got much goods laid up for many years? Friend, an air bubble can hit your brain in the next fifteen seconds. What good is your money then? Next, be joyful. Notice again what he says in verse 17, «But in the living God who giveth us richly all things to enjoy». Again, God is not a cosmic killjoy. God is not trying to say, «I want to keep you poor, I want to keep you down in the dust». No, God is a good God. Psalm chapter 84 and verse 11, «The Lord thy God is the sun and a shield. The Lord will give grace and glory. No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly». And the devil will get you to think that somehow, God doesn’t want you to have a good time, but He does! And we’re going to talk next week about the family fun.
God gives us richly all things to enjoy. And if God has given you a fine house, and God has given you a fine car, and God has given you a bank account, and God has given you good things, I am so happy for you. That’s wonderful! Just don’t trust in it. Don’t trust in that. Trust in, «The living God who giveth us richly all things to enjoy». Be humble, dear friend, be trustful, be joyful. And last of all, be generous, if God has given you much. Look at it here in First Timothy 6 verse 18, «That they may do good, be rich in good works! Ready to distribute! Willing to communicate»! Don’t squeeze it and hold it. You are a steward; it belongs to God. If God has given you wealth, it is an opportunity and it is an obligation. And by the way, let your children see you give. Let your children, let your family be known as a family that knows how to give and how to distribute.
The Greatest Wealth: Godly Children and Eternal Treasure
Now we’re talking about family finances. And the devil has tried to ruin our families and to keep us from understanding what this Good Book says. Now listen to me. The greatest wealth that you have is not in the bank. If you have children, your greatest wealth is your children. You know people say, «Oh, children, they make a rich man poor». You’ve got it backward. They make a poor man rich. Friend, a poor man can’t take his money to Heaven. I’m taking my children to Heaven. I’m taking my children to Heaven. Thank God for a Christian family. Thank God for the things that really matter! «Godliness with contentment is great gain,» and that godliness comes when we give our hearts to Jesus Christ and trust Him as our Lord and Savior.
Would you bow your heads in prayer? Heads are bowed and eyes are closed. Would you begin to pray for your own heart and then pray for those round about you? Just pray, «Dear God, I want to be godly so I can be content. God, I want to be godly so I can give You glory». How many would say, «Pastor Rogers, I’ve given my heart to Jesus Christ and He has saved me, and I know because He has saved me, because I’ve been saved and born again, if I should die today I would go straight to Heaven». Or you might say, «Pastor Rogers, I don’t have that assurance. But if a person can know that they’re saved, I want to know it».
Well, friend, you can know it. The Bible says, «These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God that you may know that you have eternal life». And it comes by believing on the name of the Son of God. Now if you want that assurance, here’s what I want you to do while heads are bowed and eyes are closed, I want you to pray this prayer:
Dear God, I am a sinner. My sin deserves judgment, but I need mercy. Jesus, You paid for my sin with Your blood on the cross. You died to save me if I would trust You. I do trust You. I believe You’re the Son of God. I believe You died for my sin on that cross. Thank you for doing that. I believe that God raised You from the dead. And right now, right now, right now this moment, this very moment, I receive You as my Lord and Savior. Come into my heart, forgive me, cleanse me, save me, and begin now to make me the person You want me to be. In Jesus' name, Amen.